Major Depression and Eating

I was diagnosed with depression in 1997 and took meds on and off since then. But about 2 years ago I started taking time off work because of it. Been out on short term twice and currently working on a third time. I am seeing a therapist and looking for a psych doctor for my meds. I had the RNY in Oct of 2010 but I find that I can eat just about anything and I munch. Not losing much at all. I didn't go thru with this surgery to not lose anything but I feel like I am failing at this too.

I hate my job and think it is part of the reason I am depressed but so drained to look for other work or start a business I have wanted to do. I just feel like my life is over and I am only 40. Since I took off of work it seems my munching has slowed down but I still just want to eat and drink soda's. I fight myself daily on not having a soda and munching.

My therapist has me writing a list of resentments, helpless & hopeless, and inadequacy issues and I see her today. Hopeing she can actually help me. Since taking time off I have been called for 2 interviews within my company for the training department. But being I am off on leave I am not sure if they can allow me to interview for them or even if i want to or can do the job. I am so confused. I have done some training and was working on my master for Training but I feel like I can't do it. I just don't know what to do anymore. So lost and confused.

Hi Charity,
I can so relate to your post.  I initially lost a little over 100 pounds, but during an alcohol relapse, I went back to old eating habits and gained back 35 pounds.  I took some medical leave a year ago, to go to the psych hospital and alcohol rehab.  I then left work one day in April, and applied for Social Security Disability, and was approved on the first try.  In addition to bipolar disorder, I have fibromyalgia and herniated discs.  The chronic pain just feeds my depression something fierce. 

As for the eating behaviors, I bought a book a couple of years ago, and never stuck to it.  It's called, "the Beck Diet Solution," by Judith Beck.  It looks promising for helping me deal with the thinking behind my poor eating habits.  I would love to go through it and share what I am learning with someone also going through it.  Feel free to e-mail me at [email protected] if you are interested in working on it simultaneously with me.

Be safe.

Trish Reilly