Do I trade my mental health with meds or mental health with weight gain n a severe eating...

Went pretty hypo manic, and ended up in patient for 3 weeks from the 20th til the 11th of last/ this month.. During that time they tried Trileptal which without the purging dropped my sodium to 124ish (keep in mind I have severe bulimia so not a good thing). Then they put me on Neurontin for like 2 days, then now they have me on Depakote. I did lose almost 10 lbs in a week after they took me off the Lamictal.

They just increased my Depakote to 1500 and I've gained 3 lbs, freaking out a little bit already. :(

I have noo freedom over it all now though because I'm under commitment now for my severe eating disorder They keep griping if they can get enough food, etc in me the meds would work better, etc.. If they can make me not gain weight I'd be more likely to eat. :( 

I don't know what to do but cry and give up. I'm severely depressed. I'm bout to be thrown in the hospital for however long they want (I do want to get better some days but others I don't I'll be honest and I am just terrified, period, I am willing to work the program but I'm just scared).

Sad thing is if you look at me I'm still chubby. :( All of this for nothing.

What happens if they finally find a good med combo and I start regaining everything though what do I do?? Compromise mental stability for fat which is mental instability in another source for me. I'm just lost and broke and sad.

I'm in therapy 3 times a week. I probably should be in patient right now truthfully but my therapist had to cancel because of weather Thursday or I garuntee she'd put me in because I was not doing well. Been hypomanic for 5 days again.. had labs gonna call psychiatrist Mon bout upping Depakote if they can but IDK if they can.

I'm barely sleeping without self medicating, I'm jjust a blubbering mess LOL... I'm a severe cycler too if that helps any typically.

I know you have been struggling for some time now and hope you find the right path out.  Being bipolar and having an eating disorder is difficult.  I am speaking from experience and yes I have been inpatient for both.  I have and still use some of the meds you discuss freaquently.  I think that you need to stop thinking about the possible side effects of weight gain and let them help you.  Work on getting on plan with your eating and not relying on meds for magic fix.  They are a tool just like this surgery.

I struggle with my weight I take a lot of the meds you mentioned causing weight gain and I am underweight.  I work on my issues with food in a cognitive manor which is what you need to do in my opinion.  I am greatful for the med regulation I am at right now ( all seem to keep me from becoming manic or severly depressed)  I still have to work hard to make the right choices dietarily...I guess I had the ah ha moment I hope you do.  The meds are a tool....they will help...there is not going to be a chemical only way out of this Misty...YOU are going to have to be part of it...I am afraid there is no magic pill.

I know how hard it is when you are struggling.  Let the doctors worry about the drugs and combinations and worry about you and the cognitive problems.  I just know from your post here and many past posts...You are looking for a magic pill it seems and there isn't one.  Just because a med has a side effect of weight gain doesn't mean it is the cause.  I have been on a decent dose of Seroquel and lamictal daily for well over a year and still struggle with maintaining  a BMI and weight that are in the normal catagory and not underweight.  You and I both know these drugs have side effects of weight gain...Just thought I would share.

Hoping you have a Heathy New Year
Never Give Up you are worth it

Thanks... I do know that part of my daily therapy with my in patient care will be DBT because I also have BPD, ptsd, etc

I wish I could just forget about the scale and everything for 1 day. :(

This is just exhausting.

I also used to be Borderline Personality Disordered.  I was able to get rid of that diagnosis, but do slip back to some of my old patterns, especially if I relapse with my drinking.  I have been struggling with that for a couple of years now.

Hang in there.

Trish
 

I empathize a great deal.  I was in outpatient treatment twice for my binge eating disorder, with a history of purging also.  There was a young woman in one of my groups who had the surgery and was struggling with anorexia, and had been inpatient multiple times for it. 

Right this minute, your mental health MUST come first.  Follow the doctor's instructions concerning your medication.  Do not deviate from it at all.  I am bipolar and alcoholic, in addition to my eating disorder.  When I play with my meds, I end up drinking instead.  I have been relapsing with alcohol for over two years now.  I am currently in outpatient treatment for that.  Eating disorders/alcoholism all have the same root.  

Priorities must rule your life right now.  Medication and stability must be first and foremost for you.  Your weight will be able to be dealt with AFTER you are stable.  Your meds, like your surgery, are a tool to help you with your situation.  They will help you make the healthy decisions concerning your food choices and how you deal with your food once it is consumed.

Hang in there.  There are many here who can empathize. 

Hugs,
Trish
 

Thank you.

See if your doc will put you on Adderall. It is used to treat ADHD and Major Depression. It is the ONLY thing that has helped me with my Mental and eating disorder problems. It has helped change my life. I am happy and normal now. Thank GOD for Adderall.

hi, i'm natalie...that mey sounds lame but i'be been through hell and back with this stuff...call me anytime if you'd like 2679872106..