Problem x post from Sex forum

OK here goes.  I don't post to this forum often and I am not sure if I should post here or the sex area to be honest.

It has to do with my DH  I am starting to be turned off by him being overweight.  If you look at my pics you can see he is not a huge man but he is big.  (6'4" about 280)  when we have sex now his belly bothers me.  Not long ago I was big too and still am overweight so I know better but I cant seem to help it.  Also he is a big eater, it has always amazed me the amount of food he consumes but now I am really bothered by it.  when he fixes a plate about 6" thick with food I am disgusted (and then go back for a second plate).  The weird part is our relationship is actually better than it has been in years but these things are bothering me and I don't know what to do.  He joined a gym with me but never goes and I am frustrated.  Can anyone give me any advice on how to handle this?  i don't want to be a hypocrite and considering that only 8 months ago I was more overweight than he is I know I am being one

Okay, here it goes, for you my lovely friend I'm going to place my feelings on this in print.  Your post has made me see and feel that this is just a part of us blossoming....more on this later.

I have been well over my hubbys weight for like our whole 22 years of marriage.  I am now 16 lbs heavier than what I weighted on my wedding day.  NEVER has dh ever told me bad things about being over weight.  Only thing I can recall is a few comments on how unhealthy I was staying.  He was always always there for me when I was "dieting" and he would try to help anyway he could.  He is a nice 180 lb size at 5'7 and a half.  He is constantly wanting to get down 5 lbs and weights everyday like me and tells me about it just as I do him with every ounce I lose.  He is working out constantly  Since my surgery he has been placed on chlosterol medication then off it to a natural remedy.  Also since my surgery I have watched him eat and been grossed out. He's a pig and I never noticed.  He will start grazing 20 minutes after his dinner meal, or he will slurp food that by no means can be slurped by anyone else.  (how do you slurp on a rib?)  LOLOL.  Lately my mixed nuts go missing directly after I open them.  Or after supper the microwave is humming and the smell of popcorn is everywhere.

Blossoming-is it because we are becoming self-aware of ourselves and we are so attached to our loved ones that it seems magified?  Probably...I don't have the answers but I do think its part of our growing.  I also think that we have to be so careful here and not let it turn into a big monster of a problem, which is why you are posting it.  I think that it will get better as we go.

Love ya!
Lisa

I made a big mistake by saying something to my Wonderful Beautiful daughter about eating so much. I would never do anything to hurt her feelings. Buy I did. She just cried and cried. I have learned that I must tread lightly and if I take the time to think back..It bothered me also when comments were made about my weight before my RNY... I already knew that I was overweight and miserable so did I need to be reminded. No I Did Not...I am sure that your hubby already is aware of his weight issue. And like us before ,when we were ready we made a choice. I think if you give him time he also will make the right choices.
Joan

Thanks for the support Lisa.  I am glad to know that I am not alone in my feelings about this. I am sure we will both get past this part of our changing process