Gloomy thoughts?

I'm only about 3 weeks out from my WLS, and I'm kinda scared that I've had some really gloomy feelings. Almost like an overwhelming gloom and doom feeling. Like things just arent right, and that I'm done for any day now.

I've never liked winter, and I'm so anxious for spring to get here.

Maybe its just because I know how busy I'm going to be this spring/summer/fall with my new life. My brother and I have a few years of fishing together to catch up on, and I just love being outside and taking my wheelchair out and about to the stores.

Any ideas on what I can do to feel better?

Neil

Hi Neil,
I can relate to that doom and gloom feeling about winter.  I have my own issues with January and February, and they have nothing to do with my weight loss surgery.

I will tell you what I do to combat my feelings when I get 'squirrelly' in the brain.

1.  I am in therapy, and talk to my therapist about everything.  He has guided me in taking care of myself and changing my behavior so that I can experience some positive transformations.
2. I have a deep relationship with God, and pray everyday.  I also am active in my church, and go to Bible studies, which helps me break the isolation I am tempted to wallow in.
3. I do craft projects for gifts so that I can look forward to the joy of giving the gift and share in someone else's joy.
4. I read uplifting and spiritual books.  Some help me change my thinking about myself and my situation, some are just encouraging and helpful in getting me to think positively about stuff.
5.  I participate in AA, where I try to help others who are worse off than me.  If you are not in need of a 12 Step program, do volunteer work somewhere.  A look around your community will help you see the needs.  Homeless shelters, the Red Cross, hospitals, rehabs, nursing homes, all need help.  If you cannot commit to anything deep, just make a stop by a nursing home on a Sunday afternoon, and ask if you can visit the patients who do not get visitors.  I once worked in a nursing home, and I saw the need.  Homeless shelters need people to help tutor for the GED test, or serve meals.  Hospitals need volunteers to transport patients to and from their rooms.  The Red Cross is always looking for disaster volunteers.  They train the person and then you are available to help out if a natural disaster occurs, or a family is displaced due to fire or other disaster.  There are other ways to volunteer.  Those are the only ones that come to mind right now.
6. Write letters to soldiers.  Go to www.anysoldier.com  That website has a link where you can get snail mail addresses of soldiers and you can even do a search to get a soldier from your state. 

I hope this helps. 

God bless.

Trish

Hi Neil! 
    I'm sorry your feeling so gloomy.  I agree that winter sucks!!  I am not one for clouds and rain and the cold.  It is depressing to say the least.  I live in CA and still feel that way sometimes... luckily the winter isn't bad here!  I can only imagine what you're going through not being able to be as mobile as you want to be.  But it sounds like you have something to look forward to in a few months!!  Try to focus on the good that is coming out of all this.  I always try to see the glass as half full...  I know.. i can be such a Pollyanna sometimes!!.... but positive thinking really does help.  I could go on and on about all the reasons I should be suicidal right now... but i just don't go there anymore.   Note I said anymore!!  With the help of a family crisis center and counseling I was able to change my way of thinking.  I became in charge of my own life and hapiness.. and what an empowering feeling that was and is!!   There is always a better day ahead. Sometimes you just have to make it a better day.  On Sunday I was feeling depressed and lonely because my kids are gone at their Dad's house.  Rather than sit another day in the house depressed... I went to the mall, and then saw a movie.  I have never gone to the movies by myself before... ever!!  And I actually enjoyed it!!  I know that might not be feasable for you, but you could invite a friend over to watch a movie at your house instead.  Company is always good for the soul. 
 If you don't have a therapist or counselor already, I would suggest looking into it.  It really helps to talk and if the counselor is good they will give you constructive ways to deal with the things going on in your life. 
I hope tomorrow is a better day for you!!


Debbi

 Neil,

Good morning.  I went through a very similar psychology before my surgery.  Since we are all different I will share what I did and you can see what fits for you.  When I got the gloomy, negative thoughts I decided to double my efforts on getting to know people who had lap-band surgery and to learn from them.  I do have to say at this point, I have always been very careful to not use others experiences as anything more than a point of information for myself.  Meaning - I try not to get caught up in why someone else lost 8 lbs and I only lost 6.

The other thing I did during a period of significant negative thoughts is to make a list of things that I have overcome in my life.  This helps me call out my strength and celebrate my success.  I also do the "what is the worst that can happen" and "what can I do about it game".

I hope some of this has helped.  Clearly you are a strong man for getting to this point.  Focus on your strength, gather strength from others and look forward to a much brighter future.

Happy New Year!

Michael

Hi Neil!  Nice to see you posting here! Here's what I do when I get gloomy and negative. I have diabetes and a few years ago I had back to back heart attacks. That REALLY changes how you view things... Life especially. You mentioned being in a chair, and I can only imagine how it presents you with different challenges. I never allowed myself to use my disease as a crutch. If there was something I wanted to do and hit a roadblock, I found a way around it. That old saying is true...where there's a will there's a way!  My words of wisdom are: Every day that you wake up is a GREAT DAY...it's also a chance to impact someone else's life in a positive way. We never know how we might inspire others to make a change either in their actions or the way they view something. 

Every day is a new start, a chance for us and others to see what life will offer us and what we do with it.

Happy New Year, and I can't wait for spring either, even if Autumn is my favorite season!!

Hugs,
Marie

Actually, scientific studies show that many people suffer mood swings in a seasonal component. There clearly is an increase in levels of depression among many people in the winter months. There is some school of thought that the depression is due to a lack of sunlight and the nutrients we get from sunlight. (In addition, people who suffer from Bipolar Disorder frequently have this seasonsal disorder - and go into a manic phase in the Spring/Summer.)There is a therapy called Light Therapy that might be beneficial. I personally prefer behaviorial therapy as it will help you develop ways to deal with the depression during this time of year.Also - you are just out of wls and your body is going through incredible changes and mood swings are normal during this time. In addition, you are probably subconsciously grieving the lose of your comfort item - food. WLS involves going through the grief cycle also and that can be rough at times.Hang in there - you will feel better.(And if this posts twice - I apologize - my lapto******ging the you need to replace me blues tonight.....)

(((((( hugs )))))) Winter is hard on many folks, especially if you are already limited physically. I head into a "low period" as soon as Halloween is over and it runs through my birthday in early March. Just try to keep busy with a hobby or reading.