Roller Coaster of Emotions

I am experiencing a plethora of emotions this week.  I have to get a handle on them, because I usually just deal with such confusion with drinking or some other form of acting out.

First, I am experiencing great happiness.  My Phillies won the World Series, and my son and I are heading to Center City to see the parade. 

Second, I am still struggling with some depression at times.  I am sick with my gazillionth sinus infection, and physically feel like crap. 

Third, I still have residual exhaustion because I was about two weeks late getting my B12 shot and it has not fully kicked in yet.

Fourth, I am experiencing some anxiety and anger because I am not sure where things lie with my bankruptcy.  My lawyer was supposed to file in June, then August.  As of two weeks ago, he had not filed my paperwork, which has me furious.  Then there is the money my son owes me.

Fifth, I am worried about my son, because he wrote me that he is suffering from shaking due to not eating.  He is broke.  He is in college full time and is waiting for his student loan to finish processing.  I sent him information about emergency food banks in Pittsburgh.

Sixth, I have not seen my therapist in two weeks and won't see him for another week because I cancelled tonight's appointment.  I can't see him if I am going to the parade because of time constraints.  He was out of town last week.  Being in treatment, I can't see him during the week, and can only see him on weekends.  He is booked tomorrow, so I must wait till next weekend.  Treatment is going well, but I still have specific work I can only do in my individual therapy with him.

So, I just had to write out what is bothering me in the hopes that identifying them, and sharing them I won't act them out.

Hugs,
Trish

I hope you feel better soon. I have been in the hospital and being sick all the freaking time sucks ass. I have a sinus infection now too. I had to go to the E.R. I fell out on my kids. I been passing out for a long time everyday now. The doctor in the E.R. took some blood and did x-rays. He came in and said I had no sodium in my body at all. I have no vitamin d. And my b=12 was low. I told him I take a shot every week. They gave me a shot of sodium that burned my ass off. The told me to follow up with my md. I told him that my doctor was a dick. Now I don't have insurance he treats me like freaking **** I don't think any doctor wants to take me with no insurance. I am struggling every day to stay alive. My body is so tired my mind runs all the time. It would be so easy to give up on life. The only thing that keeps me alive is my 33 year son and my 17 year old daughter. I just hope that things get better for you. You are a very nice person.
Amy

 Ladies,
First, I would like to say that this is the first posting to this particular forum.  There are many days that your posting is the only seemingly "human" contact since this week has been a "depression" phase for me.  I have not used but I think about it and am overdoing my allowable meds.

But i would like to say for me, taking on issue at a time helps.  When I try to address too many things is when I am in or about to be in trouble.

Try to address one thing at a time...YOU.

Also, with all due respect try to keep things in perspective;
Sobriety first
Your son has to be a good kid, you raised him right, the money "taken" was for car insurance and food, he is a full time student.

The other lady, get to your therapist first, if not able get to a meeting, even if it is an online meeting.

I hope this gives back a little, for what  you have given me.

Lea

Thanks for your reply.  I am doing better this afternoon.  I spent a great day with my other son going to the Phillies Victory Parade, which was an adventure, as over 2 million people were at this thing in Philadelphia. 

My family is taking me out for dinner this evening as tomorrow is my birthday.  My son lives in New York City, so he won't be able to come back tomorrow for dinner then.

I intend to get to a meeting tomorrow, and then possibly the support group at the hospital I had my surgery at.

Thanks again.

Hugs,
Trish

WoW! You have a lot of balls in the air!

My suggestion would be to do one thing at a time.  Since your going to the celebration in Philadelphia....ENJOY IT! Have a good time.  This may even even out your emotions.  You can only do one thing at a time. So focus on the Phillies Parade. Squeeze in a meeting too.  Call your sponsor

Hey Darlene,
You should have been at the parade.  It was wild.  I saw so many weird drunks, and it was not even 2:00 p.m.

Thanks for the encouragement.  I am going to a meeting first thing in the morning.

Hugs,
Trish