Forgiveness or resentments and bitterness

I was talking to a guy tonight who wanted to be a potential suitor.  We started corresponding from Craigslist.  I thought he was of the same religious background as me, one that teaches forgiveness and grace.  Hmmmm. Well, during our first and last conversation tonight, I mentioned Isabel's birthday party on Saturday, which was at my ex's house.  (See my "I want to scream" blog below.)  He started giving me the third degree about me seeing my ex, and how I should not go to my ex's because he hurt me by leaving me, and on and on, and how guys I date won't want me to see my ex because of him hurting me like he did.  He then asked me if I loved my ex.  I told him that I love my ex as a brother in the Lord, but not as a husband.  We said good-bye and hung up.   Well, about a half hour later, he sent me a weird e-mail blasting me about how we were incompatible and how I am not going to find a guy who will want to date me if I see my ex because no guy is going to want me to see the man who hurt me, and on and on like that.  I realized that I had been spared a really sick relationship with a really sick man. I sent him a reply to the effect that I was not going to hurt my children by not attending family functions that they plan just because their father is in attendance, and that I believe that my obedience to God concerning forgiveness is going to be blessed with a man who also understands God's love, forgiveness and grace.  I went on to discuss how therapists I work with agree with what I am doing, and that I encourage patients I work with to do likewise when they are ready. I then wished him luck in finding someone who could handle the bitterness he had toward his ex, because during his tirade, he spewed out a lot of venom about her.  I mentioned that bitterness is a poison that destroys a person and his relationships, and that I have seen it in the patients I work with. So, now, I am just wondering if there are any normal, healthy men out there, or are they all aliens and creepazoids? Hugs, Trish

I replied to this on your prior post.There are good guys out there, few and far between, but they do exist.When I met Rob, I thought he would leave me because he was too normal.He has never left my side, never passed judgement, and my daughter's father is coming to our wedding this Saturday.Rob is confident that I love him, and I am so grateful for finding someone who brings calm to my life.Don't worry, I truly believe God will put someone great in your path, when the time is right.

I say this with nothing but love and from my own personal experience: When I go fishing in a poisoned river (online dating) I only catch 3 eyed fish. hugs, Michelle

Michelle, I saw my therapist last night, and he basically said the same thing, just not so creatively.  I guess since my ex found his wife online, and she seems pretty normal, except that she married him, I thought I might be so lucky.   My therapist gave me some suggestions on where I might find a normal person.   Thanks and hugs, Trish

I love your description of online dating! My husband told my g/f that if you're looking in a dump, you'll only find garbage. I know two or three relationships that are successful from an online beginning...but three or four out of the billions of ppl looking must feel exhausting.

Marie