*SPIRITUAL* A DAY AT A TIME

05/20 REFLECTION FOR THE DAY Alcoholism is called the "lonely disease"; almost without exception, alcoholics are literally tortured by loneliness.  Even before the end of our drinking--before people began to shun us and we were "eighty-sixed" from bars, restaurants or people's homes--nearly all of us felt that we didn't quite belong.  We were either shy, and dared not draw near others, or we were noisy good fellow craving attention and approval, but rarely getting it.  There was always that mysterious barrier we could neither surmount nor understand.  Finally, even Bacchus betrayed us; we were struck down and left in terrified isolation.  HAVE I BEGUN TO ACHIEVE AN INNER CALM? TODAY I PRAY May I know the tenderness of an intimate relationship with God and the calm I feel when I touch His spirit.   May I translate this tenderness and calm to my relationships with others.  May God deliver me from my lifelong feeling of loneliness and show me how to be a friend.  TODAY I WILL REMEMBER God can teach me to be a friend. Okay.. this one touched me as I typed it out and read it for the first time.. actually had a tear coming down.  I love THIS QUOTE.. .. "the calm I feel when I touch His spirit.."  I feel that calmness now.. and I remember having that once before .. before I drank.. when I went to church regularly and had a relationship with God then.. I had even at one time right out of high school went to Bible College, but dropped out.    I know I had to travel this road.. but sometimes I wonder .. "what if.."  But also wonder .. "what if.. " I had not found Him again.. so thankful I have hugs with love

I can so relate to the quote too! I'm finally at a place (and it took almost 50 yrs) where I am more accepting of myself (being a friend to myself for a change??) and feeling that sense of inner peace again. It's been a winding, pothole filled road, but now that I found Him again, I'm not willing to lose touch or walk away. Since choosing to leave the darker side of me behind, I'm concentrating more on modesty (excluding that icon I need to delete), cleaning up my speech, and as suggested in a few websites I've been reading, getting really good at ONE commandment at a time.  I know for me, I feel best when I go to temple. I plan on going this Saturday again.