newbie here

Good morning everyone! I am a newbie to this board but have been looking at it off and on, so today I told myself to come out of hiding.  A few years after WLS, I began to drink, or course socially, once in a while and now I find myself wanting to drink everyday.....I cannot do this anymore. I know that I would possibly get support from my husband along with 'why can't you just have 1 and nothing else, I can."  well I do not think that I can anymore. I am 52 years old, most of the time I feel and look much younger, but today, I feel old and sad.....I would appreciate any suggestions, comments, and words of wisdom. Thanks for your listening. I will try and post everyday. Thanks MJ

hello MJ..  and welcome to the board.  I'm so glad that you *chose* to post today. what I have learned is that life is FULL OF CHOICES..  and one alcoholic talking to someone who *thinks* they may have a problem.. you CAN choose not to drink anymore. I firmly believe that this WLS.. has transferred our body so that we just are not able to consume alcohol.  With our already addictive behaviors.. and then the malabsorption issues.. and alcohol getting into a blood system so much faster.. I really believe that *most* wls person who does drink is facing alcoholizm in the face.   I personally crossed the line from social drinker to alcoholizm BEFORE my wls.  I then continued my drinking after WLS cuz I felt so damn good about myself and wanted to party.  What I ended up with was *partying alone* cuz I didn't want to suffer the consequences of a second DUI.  So.. how lonely is that.  But then.. how do I get the courage.. momentum to quit.  I found it thru AA and my Higher Power. And NOW.. I know.. in my mind that my body just can not filter alcohol so I don't drink (today).  If I do.. I will be back into a lonely dark place that I've climbed out of and I DON'T want to be there again. soooo my suggestion to YOU.. is to try an AA meeting.  Go and listen to the people who talk.. see if what they say relates to any of your experiences.  And then go from there..  keep going back.  The AA meetings are nothing as I use to *picture* them.. dark dirty rooms with just men sitting there with brown bags.. bad breath.. and stink. lol.. they are bright cheery rooms filled with wonderful people who are just like YOU and ME.  From all walks of life who do not judge.. because they have been in each other's shoes. okay.. I'm done  can't wait to read your posts.. KEEP COMING BACK

Rhonda: Thanks for the post. I really needed to read this today. I will try and post everyday, I should not have a problem doing that...., although thats what I say about drinking.....:)  Thanks again. MJ

actually yesterday I was at my surgeon's office.. I had not been there in 2 years.  I told her about my drinking .. and how bad it got.  I told her that I no longer drink.  She asked how I did it.. she said that there are so many coming into the office and saying they have a problem..  and she is not so stupid to know that if that many are admitting it.. there are MORE not admitting it.   She actually asked if I would be willing to speak at a support group.. and I said yes.  soo.. believe me.. YOU ARE NOT ALONE.

Hi MJ, I can totally reate to what you are saying. I had WLS 05.14.04. I began drinking about 4mos out. My drinking slowly got heavier. I was having black outs. I stopped on 02.28.08. It has been tough but I know it's the right thing. I have gained 30lbs. That is easy to do when you drink and do not make good choices. Anyway, I am also new to posting. I feel 150% better and have started to lose the weight!! Christine

Thank you everyone for your replies, it really helps.  I sit here this morning, hung over, for the 3rd straight day in  a row and vow, as I have every morning, that this is the day that I stop drinking. i hate myself for not being able to just stop. I also have been thinking about why I have to keep drinking long after the buzz takes effect, (which with wls is soon after I start) I am not sure....Any way...thank again to everyone *****plied and as I said I am going to try and sign in everyday. thanks MJ

it sounds familiar MJ..  I would take that first drink.. and it would warm my inners.. by the end of the glass I had a buzz... but I would continue drinking (binge drinking****il 2 hours I would be in a black out.. and 2 more hours usually passed out.  I struggled with how I was going to stop... and I didn't until I went to AA.   It sounds like you are coming to terms that you *just might* be powerless over alcohol.  Which is great cuz that's the First Step in The Program.  Take care hon.. you really don't have to keep living this way.  It can be much better

I had my WLS in August 'O6, with five years of sobriety and 14 years of AA under my belt.  I was active here, and studied all the ramifications of WLS and alcohol consumption, but did not work my AA program as I should have and relapsed hard this past winter.  My recommendation to anyone who thinks they MIGHT have a drinking problem is to attend at least 6 AA meetings and see if you relate to the people who share their experience.  Then, see if anyone has any strength or hope that you might want to grab onto and ask them how they got it.  That is how the program works.  One alcoholic sharing with another how they get sober and stay sober one day at a time. I have been in AA since 1989, and my experience has been that if I attend my meetings, I stay sober.  If I slack off with my meetings, I drink.  It is a simple formula that I can make a mess of very easily.   Keep posting and letting us know how you are. Hugs, Trish