getting sober w/ an enabler

jerseygirl38
on 5/3/08 10:15 am
ok, gotta say GREAT FORUM!  I've been reading everyone's posts and truley appreciate the great advice being given by you all.  With that said, I'd like to pick some of your brains about staying sober when your spouse is also an alcoholic.  Drinking has really gotten out of hand and everytime I say I don't want to drink, the hubby goes out and buys it anyway.  I even try buying a small bottle (I'm a wino) to limit myself, but then the hubby says that it isn't cost effective and goes out and gets a big box.  ugggggg. 
RHONDA FROM KY
on 5/3/08 12:44 pm, edited 5/4/08 11:56 am - ALEXANDRIA, KY
if you want a life of sobriety.. I believe that you will .."go to any lengths.. " to get/stay sober.. you have no control over hubby.. just how YOU are going to handle the situation.   Best wishes.. what I learned when quoting the the Serenity Prayer.. (for myself as I was dealing with this, only not married, living together)  .. was this.. God grant me the serenity   to accept the things I cannot change..               **I could not change another persons drinking habit** the courage to change the things I can..               **I could change my living arrangements** and the wisdom to know the difference..               **the answer came to me, my prayer was answered** It was not an easy task.  You have much to think about.. and decide.  I'll put you in my prayers

It is good to have an end to journey towards; but it is the journey that matters in the end.  ~Ursula K. LeGuin

marieh
on 5/4/08 11:53 am - So. Easton, MA
This is not an easy thing by ANY means, hon! I was very fortunate that my husband and I quit together and have maintained sobriety. It's doubly difficult to be the only one in the house or relationship who's trying to change. Getting sober requires a huge commitment.  When you're ready to, find an AA meeting and see about finding a sponsor who can help with the daily issues you'll face. I will say that from a personal standpoint, I am an advocate for counselling. I started going to figure out my food triggers. (funny...they're the same as the ones that made me drink )...After 22 yrs of sobriety, I'm still working on knowing and accepting and loving ME.  One of the best things you can do is keep reading and posting right here! This group is the best! Marie


 

        
jerseygirl38
on 5/4/08 12:23 pm
thanks.  I keep trying to muster up the courage to go to one (a meeting), but I keep envisioning a group of people who stop talking the minute i walk in.  How does one attend a meeting w/o being invited?  I think i'd feel awkward.
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