Left to my own Devices I will....

OK - today is about 20 days sober this time around. Last night, all my kids were gone (2 on sleepovers and the one out on bail - I haven't seen him since Saturday - yeah that's another issue altogether). So I had the place to myself last night.  Scary.  I wanted to drink.  No particular reason why - I just wanted to.  I DID NOT however.  (woot!)  I hate the wanting to however.  I did get a meeting in last night and I suppose I should have found another one huh? I wasn't hungry, angry or tired.  I suppose I could have been lonely but I usually love having the house to myself.  Oh well I'm not going to give it too much thought now - the moment has passed and I got through it. I just hate being alcoholic sometimes.  grrr.   cunning baffling and powerful indeed. Gonna make two meetings today and share where I'm at - that should help.  Calling sponsor now. love you guys! Michelle

Hi Michelle, I find that having the house to myself is a GREEN light to get as hammered as I want and not have to worry or answer to anyone. Even though I am not sober at the moment I find that if my partner is home I keep myself somewhat controlled or at least appear so to her. I had an awful day yesterday and drank my usual 1.5 bottles of wine. More excuses....bad day, good day, its raining it sunny.....you know the drill. But I know that being alone is always another excuse to do as I please which is to get drunk. Maybe it was loneliness for you but for me it doesn't have to be anything in particular, I am just an addict. Simple as that. Hope this helps. Congratulations on your 20 days and for making it thru yesterday!

Helloo... good to hear from YOU

Congratulations, Michelle.  You made it through a temptation without drinking.  I empathize.  My divorce sent me over the edge originally because I was alone in my house for the first time.   Congrats on 20 days as well. Hugs, Trish