I've made it one day

But  I'm scared.  I starting drinking wine every night to relive my stress.....and with my gastric bypass, which was in 03 it didn't take much to get me drunk.  I feel so embarrassed.  I did not drink last night and that was the first time in a very long time.  I've decided I don't want it.  I lost 120 pounds and have gained 30 back, I know mostly due to the wine.  I'm tired of feeling bad but I'm also a perfectionist so I started the 5 day pouch diet at the same time and it was just too much.....so now I feel like I pushed myself over the edge and am overeating because I can't drink.  Any suggestions.  I will not go to AA as I don't believe in their philosophy.  So let's not go there.  Was I taking too much on at once and just deal with one thing at a time.  Maybe my eating was fine but it was the wine.  Thanks for any help.....I've come to far to gain it all back and lose my family and friends too!

Hi! I'm glad you posted! If you're not into AA, then from what you've described a counsellor of SOME sort might be in order to h elp you with your stress triggers. Wine, overeating and another substitute are not the answer. (I'm learning this weekly) so I can fully relate here! My shrink helps me a lot with my stresses. He's suggested meditation (never really done it) or yoga...(haha...I like to EAT pretzels, not wrap myself into one)...but I'll try it. I NEED to relax. So do you. So if you don't end up making an appt. with a counsellor, take a relaxation class. It can't hurt, and it might make the wine less attractive/addictive.  :) Marie

I did have 3 glasses of red wine last night.  I realize now two is my limit.  I do see a psychiatrist and have for over 10 years.  He has prescribed Topomax which is supposed to help cravings of food and alcohol.  I only started it yesterday.  He really does not want to see me give up wine all together as he thinks I can moderate and than not feel so deprived.  If I feel deprived of that then my stress goes somewhere else.  I'm not looking at last night as a failure, but a test.  I was not drunk, but won't have that much again.  Thanks for the response....and I'm trying to stay away from situations where more would be tempting!  The weekend will be hard.....thanks for your support.

so are you able to just stop at 2.. if that is your limit  I know for myself.. once I start, I cannot stop.. so knowing my limit did me no good. do you mind me asking what part of AA's philosphy do you not believe in??  And I would think for a psychiartrist to tell you to learn to moderate your drinking.. is well not responsible..  of course I don't know how much wine you drink every nite.. but it sounds like it's not been in moderation (2) for a while.  Or it could be that you are not even really an alcoholic.. these are just things I don't know about you.  However, if you are, I thin****il you learn the first step.. you are powerless.. then you are not ready to go to "any lengths" to have sobriety.  So I hope it all works.. moderating your drinking and all.. I really do.. best wishes and please keep coming back here.  We can use the support..

You are right....once I start I can't stop.  What makes one an alcoholic anyway?  I run my own business.  Own my own home and do well in life, I just enjoy a drink.  I want to stop because of the empty calories and lose this weight I have gained back.  AA I feel beats a person down rather than picks them up.  We do have the strength within in us...as God lives in us.

.." What makes one an alcoholic anyway? " http://www.lifescript.com/channels/healthy_living/health_con ditions/drinking_in_denial.asp?page=1&trans=1 here seems to be a good article on it.. of course it's up to each individual to determine for themselves.  I consider myself one.. based on the fact that my drinking caused my life to become sort of unmanageable.. and  if I had continued it would have become totally unmanageable.  Also because I know that I binge drink... when I start.. I cannot stop.  I suffer blackouts.. and pass out.  That's me. I was able to stop by wanting someone I love to stop.. so thereby by helping him I helped me when I could not help myself.. and by going to AA meetings.  I don't go so regular now to AA meetings and still have not drank.  My last meeting was last Sunday.. my last drink was 11-17-06.  I do not want to drink.  My SO.. when he slacks on meetings, relapses.  He has to learn himself *altho I sure want to try and control it.. lol* but he must learn his own road to happiness and recovery. As we all do! and yes.. we all have the strength within us.. but some also need the help of others along with God to help get us thru it.. and there is nothing wrong with that.   I think as long as we each find our path to what our goal is that is all that matters.. we all want the same end result.. *promises* a more peaceful and happy life where we are content and love ourself.