Expecting too much

I think I've become very disappointed in my recovery program because I expected too much from it.  I want my life to be perfect.   I want my children to listen to me.  I want my house to be clean.  I want my soon-to-be-ex-husband to respect me.  I want my money problems to disappear.  I want all my problems solved!  NOW!!! And today I realized that the 12-step program was designed to help the drinker stop drinking.  Right?  And for me, my 12-step program was the tool I first used to stop compulsive eating.  Well, then it worked!  I do not eat compulsively.  I do not binge eat any longer.  The steps worked!   But my life still doesn't work.  How can this be? 

The secret to happiness is giving. Time, your advice, your self...The more we give, the more we get. MY life doesn't work the way I'd imagined...but I'm ri*****redibly wealthy in the things that matter most. My health, my family is healthy, I have friends who love me and I love them too. Ramon does a gratitude list most every day. I bet if you did your own G-list you'd feel differently about your day. :) It does set the tone and makes you feel very appreciative  for the little things. All those roses we forget to stop and smell :) Focus on what you have instead of what's missing.  Your kids ARE listening, but the only way to look cool is to pretend not to....your ex has to be able to respect himself before he can respect you..who cares if your house isn't immaculate?  it's LIVED in! You've got kids! (nuff said on that!!) Money problems will take care of themselves.... If my life were perfect, I'd be bored to tears!

Hi Jill, Wow, I could have written this years ago, before my divorce and my kids all moved away.  Some of your expectations involve people that are NOT in your control.  Time for a rewrite of the Serenity prayer just for you. God, grant me the serenity to Accept my kids and husband's lack of repect, which I cannot change, the Courage to change the things I can, ME, my attitude and expectations, and the Wisdom to know the difference. I hope this helps. Huggles, Trish

this sounds just like Dan.. he's always saying part of his "sickness" is wanting what he wants and wanting it NOW..  impatience.. self-centered..  me me me.. altho I'm with ya on the wanting my house cleaned NOW.. I just don't want to be the one to do it tho at least you are a smart lady and KNOW what you have control over.. you must be saying the serenity prayer hugsss, Rhonda

Who doesn't want everything to be perfect? In reality, it is the hardships in life that build our character.If all our problems suddenly fixed themselves because we wanted them to, well what will we learn from our lives? NOTHING.  What doesn't kill us only makes us stronger.Use your experience to help someone less fortunate than you.You are expecting way too much from life.It is what it is, and the sooner you learn to live with that, the better off you will be.Find comfort in knowing you have kids to love, the courage to move on from a unsuccessful marriage, a house you can mess up, anda brain to help find the means to find more money to pay your bills.Spend a day somewhere where people don't have these things, and hopefully you will realize how wonderful your life truly is.If you want to be miserable, you will.Learn to love and appreciate everything good in your life,no matter how trivial it seems.