Hitting Bottoms after Sobriety

Some say they hit bottom before ever walking through the doors of recovery.In a way, I feel I am emotionally hitting a bottomed out feeling after almost 90 days in the program. Friends I once had no longer appeal to me, whether they used or not, I question the love of my fiance, when I know it is pure.I guess the uncertainty in this world scares me.I constantly pick apart my life, and wonder if it is real.I have been infested with so many lies, so much hurt, that I am trying to make sense of it, of my sobriety.I pray to God to let my mind's suffering ease.I pray to just live and the answers will come.Can anyone relate??

I too felt some of these feelings in early sobriety. However as my brain started to clear out a bit things got a lot more clear. I started to use the things I had learned in A.A. and apply them to my life. I also went to a lot of meetings and interacted with the winners. I must admit I don,t have the same friends that I had when I was out there because I choose not to be around a lot of alcohol and drugs. The good news is, It does get better if we put a little effort into it. Good luck

One day at a time right now girl...I too went through those feelings early on. Just remember not to make any big decisions right now, and to hang tight to a program. Christine

Keep it simple.. and as the others suggest, keep following the program.  Gather you a bunch of support people and CALL THEM.. tell them how you are feeling.  You are working thru and experiencing feelings that you use to keep numb.   You will be all right.. keep praying to God and asking for his help to work thru you.   

Hi Shelly! Although I haven't officially started my recovery yet I really think I understand what you're saying.  It's so scary after you've traded one addiction for another and have to give it up.  I'm in the same place you are as far as questioning the love of my boyfriend and picking apart my life.  I sent you an email earlier in response to the one you sent me a few days ago.  If you want to talk give me a call!  440-263-6056.  PS  my exhusband has been a recovering alcoholic for 17 years.  I'd be happy to ask him for any tips. Your friend, Jen

Give those feelings of unsurety time to pass. During my early sobriety, I didn't accept wedding invitations, never went out with the girls and woudln't even go to a restaurant that served alcohol for the first TWO YEARS. Until I had a handle on my addiction and my emotions. We ate at fast food joints and taht was fine. To this day I cannot and will not walk into a package store...not even for a friend, and I'm sober 21 years. Those friends of yours that don't understand, aren't really friends.  I can remember shutting myself away until I felt confident that I could go FOOD shopping and not buy a bottle. For hte first several months, I had someone else do it for me. I did whatever it took to get and keep me sober. This is YOUR life...treat yourself with the respect you deserve. The unease will eventually become your inner strength. I know that sounds ridiculous, but all this confusion you're in right now is the lingering effects of the booze. It takes a few months for the physical addiction to leave...but sometimes a much longer time (at least in my case) for the emotional and mental addiction to lose its grip on your MIND.  Do what YOU need to do for YOUR sobriety.  Marie

I have had several bottoms while sober.  What also could be happening to you could be plain old ordinary depression.  When we give up alcohol, and food, we are forced to feel the feelings that go with life's ups and downs, and some of those feelings are not pretty.  In AA, we call it "life on life's terms."   Are you in therapy?  You may want to consider talking to a therapist, and possibly discussing these issues with that person.   Big hugs, Trish