Telling my story - closing my circle - I am a survivor!

When we tell our stories we become more real to each other ... The life of man is a full circle from childhood to childhood.... here I am from highschool to what I became to now to today - I am close to closing my WLS circle - and I am happy about it.  I wrote to myself a few verses that are tooo intense for me to share in full right now - so I edited it and will just share ... I woke up one morning  wanting to be free of the reflection in the mirror that spoke of someone other than me The fat girl in the mirror glaring back at me is nothing but a woman asking to be free Oh fat girl in the mirror wait a bit and see in due time and in right season I will set both of us free Locked in a prison of her own making protecttive shell   from hurt and pain she gave her heart freely and it was broken abused beaten and forgotten  hurt and pain so real she could feel a body raped and scorned settling for less being told she was less than how could she ever set herself free? ....Don't call me pretty when I feel ugly I am just barely hanging on to this armor of fat to ease my pain my broken heart given in vain Oh fat girl in the mirror I am trying, I am trying it is too hard don't you see the pain of the brokenhearted  is worse than flesh disease ..... then ... I felt His hand one day touching me where I lay beaten and bloody covered in blood and feces warmed by my childrens tears I heard Him saying I love you as you are COME TO ME! I saw His hand and I took it asking for a new heart to live for Him and to be free... He delivered from abuse and He blessed me with a good man whose love for me is like the song of Solomon He made me my husband's virtuous woman and He blessed my seed my dear children are blessed indeed God has been so good to me Now I just need to  set myself free Oh fat girl in the mirror wait a bit and see with God on my side I can do this I will set both of us free While I was waiting God was speaking whispering to me  "MY DEAR CHILD YOU ARE FREE,  YOU ARE FREE,  LET GO AND LIVE!  YOU ARE FREE INDEED!  YOUR BODY IS A LIVING TEMPLE – OFFER IT UP TO ME" I cast my cares onto Him and felt the heaviness lift I decided to jump right in and do what was best for me with God on my side I will make it - He will see me through all of this I have the will to live healthy free of all disease The reflection in the mirror no longer torments me the fat girl in the mirror now smiles back at me the reflection in the mirror is no one else but me RUNNING, BREATHING, LIVING, WALKING FREE OF ALL DISEASE I AM FREE, I AM FREE! WITH GOD ON MY SIDE I WILL MAKE IT I AM FREE INDEED!  Below Is this my WLS circle (LAP RNY 2/5/07) 8 months out - my highschool picture to what I became to today - I thank my fat girl image living in me pushing me towards my goal - there is no turning back now! LETS TELL OUR STORY - IT IS IN THE TELLING OF OUR STORY THAT WE BECOME MORE REAL TO ONE ANOTHER AND WE ENCOURAGE OTHERS!  8 MONTHS OUT - MORE THAN HALF A PERSON LOST - 0 CO-MORBIDITIES AND FULLY EQUIPPED - THERE IS NO STOPPING NOW! YAY TO HEALTHY LIVING I DID IT FOR ME LIKE YOU ARE DOING IT FOR YOU!

"With the lord by our side any thing is possible" Look at you girl living proft.             Barbara

Wow! An amazing story...inspiring in so many ways!  You go, Woman!

You know when you are going thru, you think that this isn't only happening to you. However, it is always nice to KNOW that you are not alone. Thanks so much for sharing BTW you look great