I'm new to this board and....

Not sure what to make of myself....  I had Rny almost 2 years ago and very happy at the way I turned out I've had my plastics already and I had hit my goal weight after being 10 months out! I am so grateful for everything you guys have no idea..... So here goes... My mom had been sick for 3 yrs with awful cancer, and she just passed away 3 weeks ago. I'm 28 and have 2 older sisters who are away and a younger brother 23. My mom did everything for everyone of us! So now that she is gone I've been taking over. I have been to the ER twice in one week, from being sick run down and dehydrated, but this is also sad to say that when my mom got really sick and spent her final month in the hospital I started taking her pain meds. When thos finally ran out I started withdrawaling and ended becoming very sick, but now thank god I am better and pain med free! I drink at night with my friends but its nothing crazy and only once in a while to I get somewhat drunk! I'm just not myself latley and I'm going through so much that my head is spinning. To top it all off the antibiotic I had been on from being very sick made me vomit all day long, and I feel as though now I'm kind of used to that and find myself vomitting at least 2 meals a day... I just hope to god for me and my mom that things get better from me.Tomorrow I promised myself that I would start over and get back to the gym and do what I normally used to do before all this.... Thanx for listening Toni

Good morning Toni.. First let me say how sorry I am for the loss of your mother.. you must still be grieving her loss and will for a long time.. actually probably always will, but things will get easier over time.  I hear that anyways... my own mother and father are still living but are creeping up there in age. Also congratulations on stopping the pain medicine..   that must have been a great burden off your mind.. to break away from what was approaching a bad addicition, which I'm sure you can look back now and see. It appears each of us are filled with many addictive habits.. if you like I went back and found the post that contains many of OUR STORIES from here on this board.. please read and take what you can. http://www.obesityhelp.com/forums/addictions/a,messageboard/ action,replies/board_id,5365/cat_id,4965/topic_id,3383555/ I hope to see you post more.. it's good seeing you.  I think we have a couple of the same friends.. we must run in the same circles hugsss with LOVE, Rhonda

Hi Toni, First, I want to offer my condolences on your mother's death.  It is so painful to lose a loved one, and you are still fresh in your grieving process.   My best suggestion is to seek psychotherapy.  My reason for this is that you are dealing with multiple issues, and they are intertwined.  The addictions, first the pain meds and the alcohol, combined with the purging are one issue.  You also have the grieving issue with your mother's terminal illness and recent death.  This is a lot for anyone to deal with.   As you say, in your own words, "my head is spinning."  A therapist can help you sort out all that stuff that is spinning around and make some sense of it all.   Hang in there.  Feel free to PM me if you need to talk. Hugs, Trish