Took steps to keep myself in check

I was getting anxious about returning to work yesterday. I've been shopping on QVC way too much and it got way out of hand. My former alcohol consumption (which stopped 21 yrs ago) became a shopping addiction recently. On Sunday I'd ordered more items and had my hubby block the three shopping channels I knew of..plus the one in Spanish. I can figure out how to shop in a foreign language too...so that went as well.

Work was ok...tiring for the first day back. The most tiring part was I started a new job that I didn't put in for. Found out that many of hte people who didn't get it are going to be out of a job by the end of the year.  The managers are trying to get ppl to work faster and I'm thinking:...are you whacked?  Why should they if they know they're out of a job ANYWAY...This is why I shopped like mad once I found out I got this job I didn't want.  I feel horrible because I would've loved a layoff if only to find a job closer than an hour away. In spite of everything I think I'm going to like the job. None of hte people on this new team are happy with it. There is no training for the ppl who need to learn my half of it, and no training yet for those of us who need the financial part. So it's pretty much a cluster f*ck.  I know things happen for a reason, and I'm glad I stopped myself from shopping, but I can't help feeling bad for those who know their jobs are numbered.

Hi Marie, I am sorry to hear your job is not what you would like.  Being in a career I never wanted, I can relate big time.  Job security is not what it used to be.  Keep turning the situation over till it either resolves or you at least have some peace about it. Shopping addiction?  I am an expert on that.  A year before I had my surgery, I went into credit card consolidation.  I have times when I am tempted to declare bankruptcy because of my extreme debt.  Hang in there, and work your steps when you are tempted to spend.   Hugs, Trish

Thanks Trish, I'm amazed that it feels better just knowing I shut myeslf off.  Sounds odd to say, but there you have it! I am not "not" buying anything, but just not using my credit cards except for medical appointments. And only then if I don't have the cash in my checking account.  I needed to do this because I just felt like I was heading face first down a hole I wasn't sure I could climb out of. This is the most in debt I've ever put myself and I'm ashamed to even think of the total. Which I'm sure isn't done wracking itself up yet. So, now I will concentrate on spending the next few years throwing money on it every month. You wanna dance, you gotta pay the fiddler.  Marie