day 7

Hi, I'm Liz, and I'm an alcoholic.

I've been sober 7 days and have attended 6 meetings.

I am angry.

I cry.

With that, I'll pass.

Hi Liz,  One of the scariest times for me is when I feel the f***ing feelings and am not able to numb them with food, alcohol, sex, shopping, or cutting.  I think that was the hardest part of getting sober for me.  Having to feel the feelings.   My therapist keeps reminding me that I will not die from feeling the feelings.  I also will not have a psychotic break from the feelings.  I just have to learn to self-soothe, and calm down. You are doing great.  Six meetings in seven days is fantastic.  Keep up the good work. Hang in there.  It does get better. Hugs, Trish

Things that helped (still help) me: Journaling Walking/hiking  Step Work Meditation Distraction in the form of movies, roller skating, reading a book, phoning a friend Utilizing my list of AA women's numbers - calling to ask "how are YOU?" (getting out of self REALLY makes a big difference) Little projects around the house (planting flowers, painting something, refinishing a piece of furniture) Coloring my hair or getting my nails done Getting all dressed up and going somewhere Meetings Volunteering somewhere (church etc) Playing a game with my kids or watching my infant niece Things that reinforce my nutty spirals: Eating for comfort Moping, laying around, sleeping Shopping (if in moderation this can go in category A, but we know I'm not the moderate type ;-)  ) Expecting comfort from others (nobody ever meets those expectations) Procrastination Guilt and shame Basically - that first 30 days was effing hard.  There's no way around it, over it, under it; one must just endure and go THROUGH it.  Keep telling yourself, "this too shall pass"  "feelings are temporary" and "I *will* get through this".  Distraction is my biggest act of self-love sometimes.  I must have read over 30 books in the last year.  The last dozen or so have been on spiritual topics (anything from christian, to new age to buddhist etc).  I've seen more movies at the theater in the last year than in the 10 previous years also.  For me, sometimes, just getting up and going somewhere, doing SOMETHING - ANYTHING gets me off the Michelle-Go-Round.  That's one carnival ride riddled with evil clowns, funhouse mirrors and tummyaches.  Not fun. Hug - you're doing the hard work.  It does get easier.  Don't quit before the miracle happens! love and light, Michelle

I can remember telling my family to bear with me during my detox. I wasn't sure how long it'd take for me to get over being angry, irrational, cranky, cry, etc.  Initially, it sucked big time. You're feeling all the things the booze used to numb for you.  Hang in there hon! You CAN do this. Once you start feeling like yourself again without the alcohol, you'll be able to feel more relaxed.  Hugs, Marie

~sending a coin your way!!!!  Congratulations and thanks for sharing.......... Martha