Addiction and the ones we love.

I am glad to see so many posting lately. As and addict as well of the child of one I know well that the disease of addiction is not limited to the user. As a young person I suffered the pain of the craziness my fathers drinking brought to our home. I acted out as a teen and was in a great deal of pain. As and adult I " controlled" my addictions so well I incorporated them into everything I did until I was a 316 pound woman with a death wish. Oh I had a good job, a husband, three great kids and I was sick and miserable. I would try to pretend all was well. My kids lived in fear their Mom would die and yes my health was bad. I was unpredictable and would fly off the handle easily then feel remorseful. Of coarse I did not see the harm I was causing in that it made my family feel insecure. I was physically ill and on some level it made me feel okay with my behavior. People felt sorry for me and so did I. I had to see after wls that operating on my body did help my health but without addressing the real underlining deal I was screwed! I was " sick and tired of being sick and tired". Recovery has given me a new life, and a chance to do it right. I am not perfect and I make mistakes but I can recgnize it and change the behavior. My whole family is happier and closer than ever. I wish everyone would "get it" but that is not always what happens. Those that choose this way of life reap the rewards but it does require a lot of willingness. It is not without it's share of work. Just not using is not the answer. Tried it and failed over and over. Today I still find new ways to be crazy and without a program and support group I would be back to over eating, compulsive whatever......because I have the disease of " more, better, different" Hugs, Laurie

Hi Laurie, I can relate to a lot that you shared. I topped out at 319. I have three kids. My husband left me six years ago, and I have been on my own since then. My kids were gravely concerned about my health. Years of therapy and this wls have really helped me transform my life. Hugs, Trish

Hi Trish, Yep, happy and healthy not so perfect work in progress thats me. What more could I ask for really? Independant wealth? Well, I would mess that up I guess. Pretty much did in fact. Truth hurts but .... I could sit in it and wallow or move on so I move on. I count my blessings today not my pennies! Hugs, Laurie

Laurie, It is refreshing for me to see people on this board that recognize that their addictions affect those around them as well. I relate to a lot of what you posted. I personally I don't have children yet but I want to someday and I don't want them to suffer from the childhood that I had. I'm glad to be in recovery, and stories like yours give me hope that it can and does get better. Thanks for the encouragement to keep working it. Gen

Vieve, My family is my biggest asset. They are so supportive. Altho they did not realize I was an addict at the time they learned about addiction and support me 110%.My kids are 22,18,and 17 yr old so it is very timely for them. They are exposed to a lot and have friends who have addiction problems. I know I can set a good example. they respect and trust me because I am honest with them. Are they perfect? Hell no! But, I know it makes them think before they act quite often. I also know they trust me if they ever find themselves in a situation that makes them think they need help. Hugs< Laurie