Difficult time

Hi all, I am having a difficult time emotionally this weekend. I went back to work on Thursday and absolutely hate my job in teaching. I love my part time jobs working in mental health, but the teaching job I deplore. Problem is, I am stuck in the teaching job because of my salary and the amount of debt I have. Then, last night, I learned my ex is planning a big trip to a chateau in Normandy, France next summer. When we were together, vacations involved a cabin in the woods. I hate my life right now, and really have been tempted to do something stupid, like cut myself. I am not going to do that, because my therapist would just kick my butt big time for it. I did go to a women's meeting this afternoon and talk about the discouragement, but I still am depressed and discouraged. I just feel trapped in an existance that I helped create and I hate it. Sorry to be such a downer, but this is where I am right now. Hugs, Trish

Trish I know I dont know you, but your storyI do recognize. Feeling trapped into things that don't make you happy (like the teaching job) and pissed learning about the ex having more fun now. But I bet your life "is" better now. Probably better without him? I know there are many men in my life that sure I miss from time to time but would it be worth goign back to everything involved with them? Maybe not. For me its a not. With the teaching job-well, the main thing I can say is that you do "have" a job-you could be stuck and not have a job and have all the debt you have. I know its not easy, but the only thing that gets me thru most days is just either remembering how bad things have been for me in the past, or thinking about how bad they could be technically. I am having a lot of troubles with $ too right now, and I am sooo frustrated all the time knowing that I can't do anything or buy anything at all for myself extra right now. I only have money for the absolute bare necessities every 2 wks, and my hubby is planning it that way so we can get caught up on so many old bills but I just get sooo mad ! Please keep your chin up- Judi

Trish~ Just wanted to say Hi and let you know that you are loved! You are in my thoughts and prayers for strength and faith to help you through. Dana

Hi Trish.. It sounds like you still have a lot of resentment towards your ex, and it sounds 100% justified, but it's YOU that it will eat, not him. I'm sure you know this. You also know that all you can control is what you do from this moment forward. You ARE making good/better choices and taking positive steps. I know things don't happen on our timelines and it really gets aggravating. Try to find solace in the fact that you are doing what is HONORABLE - doing a job you dislike in order to rectify your situation. It is temporary - not a life long sentence! I'm thinking of you Big hugs Michelle

I'm sorry to read about this, Trish, but its definitely something we all go through time and time again. The best advice I have for you is to turn over as much as you can, it's hard because our instincts are to take it back and do it ourselves, but it can't be our plan, it has to be his. I'll be praying for you and I hope your load lightens up soon! Amber