Sponsors - do they have to be local?

Greetings earthlings! I've attended an AA meeting every day for 8 days now. Hard to believe huh considering I was so apprehensive about that first meeting. I've met a lot of really nice people, and I know I need to reach out and find a sponsor, but there are only a couple of women in the group who have over a year, and one of those I just don't trust. I've seen how she kind of rides and teases one of her sponsees publicly, and frankly that will NOT work for me. There is a new all women's meeting this afternoon that I will attend, and perhaps I will find somebody there. I'm curious though... does a sponsor need to be from your home group or even your area? What do I do if I don't think anybody would work for me? Is it my sick mind resisting? I'm going to pray about it and trust that I'll receive what I *need* Love you guys! Michelle

You got the right mind set and I'm so proud of you, most people don't move this quickly. You look great, btw!!! My recommendation is to find a sponsor that you will see at least once a week (it shows accountability and you really want to spend as much time as possible), perferably someone in your homegroup. Sometimes that just isn't possible so its perfectly fine to ask someone outside your group. I think going to the women's meeting is a good idea, you'll have many more options. When I pick my sponsors I chose someone who lives near me, has more than a year, who definitely has a good program and practices it, who I know I would feel comfortable talking to, and someone with an open mind. Its very important when you get to your 4th & 5th steps. And in the meanwhile, if you can't find someone there, you can always find a temporary sponsor in another area or someone to work with you. I'm sure we are all here to help lend a hand. Keep praying on it, you will find someone. Amber

Hi Michelle, You look great. I am so proud of you for your earnestness in making meetings. You are doing wonderfully. Amber's advice is great. My suggestion is to pray about finding a sponsor. When you go to the women's meeting, see if there is someone with good sobriety and at least a year. Also, make sure she has worked the steps already. Keep up the good work. Hugs, Trish

Dear Michelle: Congratulations! I have 22 years sober and I have several principles that I use for those who have sponsor me: 1. First, are they consistently working their program. Sometimes a sponsor will get so consumed with others issues that they forget to work on them. 2. Second, will the person be a truth teller to me. Nothing worse than someone who just cosigns your stuff. 3. Third, do they practice healthy boundaries. (Very important) I hope some of these principles are helpful. Our addicition violates trust and it is important to relearn how to do relationship. Your friend on the Journey, Al Soto

Michelle, I am so proud of you. Good advise from the previous posters. I personally need a sponsor who is local. I took my time finding one and took the leap of faith. That said my sponsor has 17 yrs and has an out of town sponsor. She would prefer someone closer but it works for her as she has a 10 yr relationship with this woman. Hugs, Laurie