Another missed day of work..

I've missed more work sober than I ever did while drinking/using! Trying to get my son in to be diagnosed today - but most of the doctors' offices dont' open until 9 am. If they can't see him today, I'm taking him to a hospital. We cannot go on ONE MORE DAY like the one we had yesterday. I have two younger kids in the home and this is VERY hard on them too. If you read the main board - you knwo he went out his window last night, the police returned him, and in between his screaming how much he hates me, he's vowed to take his life if i force him to stay here. I'm terrified, guilt ridden and just so completely overwroght and overburdened. I know I have to take care of me, but I'm about to melt into a big pile of jello on the floor. SOMETHING has got to give. Pray for me - pray my work is understanding. Pray that I can get another job if they're not understanding. Pray for my strength and patience. Pray for the calm I'm going to need to just DEAL WITH him for one more day. This is really taking its toll on me and what good am I going to be to anybody if I go check *MYSELF* in somewhere? By now, i'm not drinking on sheer principle alone (15 days sober) - devil is NOT gonna make me! (I'm one stubborn bioootch) love you guys, m

Michelle, Great job on staying on track. Another day not giving into the demons is another victory. Prayers are coming your way for you and your family. Jim

Michelle do not worry about posting too much! I have felt like that too but that is what this forum is for! 15 days! Excellent. I think about you a lot. Sending you positive energy and strength. I have teens and young adults it is a challenge daily but when there is crisis boy that requires and extra dose of Mom strength. My boys like to show their a** when Dad is out of town. I cannot describe the mixed emotions that brings out. Hurt, anger, guilt, fear....... I have learned slowly to just do whatever I have to do in the moment. I can vent afterwards with people I trust but with my child I have to be consistent and in control in his eyes. Glad you are here, Laurie

Michelle, thinking of you xoxox Bethany

Hi Bethany, I like your pix. Hope you are doing well today. Laurie

Gee, you brought back memories. When I first got sober my boys were adolscents. That really sucked. The last time I got sober, my youngest, 18 years old, was using heroin. Not fun either. Post as much as you need to. Get to an AA meeting when you can. But remember the 3rd step. Turn your life and your son's over to your Higher Power. There is hope. Now that I have gotten better, and been sober almost five years this time, my sons, now adults, are really neat young men who enjoy my company and I enjoy theirs. Sending you prayers and hugs, Trish