198.1 Last week
198.3 Today

Food: B
Water: A
Vitamins: A
Exercise: F

Did better than I thought, as I crossed the 200 line a few times last week. I am getting back to basics and not mindlessly eating carbs.

Last week got diagnosed with sciatica. What a pain in the ass :-)

Good week to all.

-bob

Anyone reading the weigh in threads knows I and my family are going through a pretty rough patch right now. I thought I?d write a little bit about that and how it is affecting my Bariatric progress.

"Life happened". We see that over and over again in threads here. Many of us - all of us - have life happen. No one is immune. We?ve had some tough times since my surgery in Oct ?16, but they were pretty much garden variety compared to now. I had often wondered how I might react in a genuine life changing situation. I am finding out now. This isn?t going to be a soul baring post full of gory detail and lots of juicy bits. But there are some things I would like to observe.

In reading so many other posts from people on many of the boards here and elsewhere, I fully expected that I would be struggling with going off the rails of my diet. And by diet, I mean eating plan, my regular menu of options which has worked so well for me for the past 16 months. That hasn?t happened. The opportunity has presented itself over and over, but for whatever reason, it just hasn?t materialized.

For example, I stopped in at a Dunkin Donuts to get coffee yesterday afternoon. There were six cars in the drive through and none in the lot so I walked in. I ordered decaf since it was late in the day. They were just brewing a new pot and asked me to wait. Then the kid comes up and waves a free donut under my nose (figuratively speaking). This was my compensation for having to wait he said. After a little back and forth, I figured why not? I was hungry, low on calories, and it was right there. I ate half of it. It didn?t even appeal to me. And it was my Number One top choice from back in the fat old days.

I recognize I am extremely stressed out right now. I have lots of things to do and not enough time, it seems, to get them all done. I am still getting hungry at my regular times, and I am still eating, and sticking pretty close to my meal plans whenever possible. I?ve eaten more protein bars than a spaceman in a sci fi novel in the past two weeks, and enough beef jerky to keep Jeremiah Johnson going. I?m not eating enough though.

The really bad stuff has not made any inroads. My weight is dropping like a rock. I am down 7 lbs since last Sunday's weigh in. Today I am digging out some things from immediate post surgery days to boost my calories and protein. I am going to be doing some protein shakes between meals and I still have some Click hot instant coffee protein as well.

Mentally, I am doing fairly well. That is a self assessment. But feedback from family and close friends confirms that. I have an incredible support network, starting with my wife of 34 years. I fully expected to be angry at God right now, as well as angry at my father. That hasn?t happened. We are Christians, and I can truthfully say God has been bearing all of us up through this.

As for Dad, I am deeply sad. He never let his emotions show, and even the couple days before, he never let on for a second that things had gotten this bad. And we were close, spending lots of time together. But he was his own person, as we all are. He lived a long life, longer than most people get. In the end he made choices which excluded the rest of his family. I cannot know his thought process, only the results. I have some guesses based on how things happened, and how things are working out, but I will never know for sure.

In any case, I am weathering the storm, and my weight loss for which I have worked so hard is still intact. I am lower now than I want to be. Losing muscle mass is a real concern for me. It is time to bulk up with more protein, hopefully getting back to some sort of routine before long. In other news, after going round and round with the people in my Bariatric practice for the last six months, I am FINALLY scheduled for an RMR test in a week and a half. That should give me a little more info as to where I really need to be calorie wise. Knowledge is power.

Thank you Bob. I am doing well, better than I thought I might. I've had wonderful support from friends and family. I am also a Christian. I expected that I would be very angry at God by now, but I am not. I can truthfully say my faith has been getting me through each day.

I am going to write more about things in a separate thread, but it may be a bit before I have the time. I have your email. Thank you. Good for me that I got an email notification. For some reason I can't find your message here on the board anywhere.

In other news, my low weight the other day was not anomalous after all. I've dropped 6 lbs since Sunday. I was 266 lbs this morning. I am adding protein shakes back into my diet to keep from losing muscle mass.

Thanks Bill, I appreciate it. But please take care of yourself first. I sent my email address via the friend request.

197.6 Last week
198.1 Sunday

Food: D
Water: B
Vitamins: A
Exercise: F

Weighed Sunday but forgot to check in. 201 today, depressed.

Good week to all.

-bob