Help me to not give up

I used to come in here all the time and respond and post and try to be as active on here as possible. I stopped about a year and a half ago just because I got too busy with other things. I had RNY in October 2007 and lost 165 pounds the first year and kept it off for the most part for three years and had no complication until May 2010. I started with an internal hernia, then I had bowel obstructions over and over and I had part of my colon removed ans then more obstructions, and so on and so forth. My last complication was a bowel obstruction exactly one yea ago. I have had no complications since; however, I have gained 100 pounds in the past year.

I haven't been as active as I used to be because I don't feel as good as I used to be. I need help. Whether its a pro talk, words of encouragement, medical advice, or just a swift kick inthe butt, I know I needed to come here before I would be able to get back where I was at one time.

We say after the weightloss the real work begins.  Sorry about the hernia and bowel obstructions...They can happen.  Usually there are just one or two issues, but it sounds like you've been through the ringer!! 
Some thoughts in no special order.  Head to the local support group...Can't hurt and may help.  Look into the DS surgery.  Also the ROSE procedure...But that one has proven to be less effective. For those who are not successful with the RNY these are the next step...If you can get approved for either (both doctor and insurance).  Step away from the food...Literally.  During my rapid weightloss and even during maintenance I would feel tempted to stuff or graze.  I would force myself to take a walk.  If I came back and still felt that way, I would take another walk!!  Yeah, I know it can be hard (being tired with work, life, health...Just trying to wind down) but it was the only thing that would work.  Also not keeping certain foods in the house...Easier said than done if you have a family.  My food choices are the pits...But I force myself to exercise to counteract my bad habits.  Finding the time can be hard, but you need to make the time.  If it is raining I would (and still do) walk inside the house.  I would put on some old rock music, (crank it up) and walk between the kitchen-livingroom-bedroom.  
Will fiber help with the bowel issues?  Maybe experimenting with different foods may help.  I also force vegetables and oatmeal down my system.  Even if I don't feel like it.  I want that full feeling.  I'll eat things like Wendy's Chili (with cheese) for breakfast...With some type of raw vegetables...Just to feel stuffed!
I would say many guys come here before, during, and after surgery.  When they get close to goal they move on with their lives.  Some stay...Some pop in on occasions.  Other just move on and don't write or post unless they have an issue or question.  All are fine. 
We're here for support.  Bend over if you need the kick but just sharing shows you're frustrated and want some help.  Brian  PS  I went to a psychologist about 10 years ago.  He was very good.  He didn't go into the deepest darkest recesses of my mind and pull out my inner child...  He was more like a high school guidance counselor.  He basically said "What do you want to do?  How do you intend to get there?  Is it realistic?  What are the established point you need to see, to know, you are making progress and have reached your goal..."  My kind of psychologist...More like a sports coach!!

Thanks a lot man. I know that if I just stayed on this road, it would end in disappointment and maybe death so I have to change my ways. I have been too embarrassed to go back to my doctor and to the support groups because of the weight gain. I have decided after I read your response that those things are in place especially for people like me.

Part of me just assumed that person that lost all the weight would never be found again, but then I saw a picture of another OH friend that lost lots of weight and then had a major weight gain. I just saw that he has lost it all again plus some, so it is possible. I think I will just buckle down for a bit and make an appt with my dietician and my surgeon and see if I can't get a scope to determine the damages.

I'm also going to stay around here and participate so my mind will be more on my goal.

Thanks again. And where is everybody? This board used to be flooded with messages every day.

Trent,
I think that at some point all of us worry about becoming a failure again. I know that I worry about it on a daily basis. And, our past response to being what we thought was a failure was to accept and sometimes hide what we felt was our fate. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophesy if we allow ourselves to disappear rather than seek the help we need to get back on track. That said, you have made the first move necessary to get back on track.

It will likely not be as easy for you to re-lose what you have gained since you no longer have the malabsorption working for you. But, the end goal is the same: a healthy life and enjoying your family. Try to focus on the changes the weight loss brought to you and use that as your motivation. Much like when you began, take your increase in activity slowly and build stamina. It's not a race. You can do this.

Good luck.
Kem

 Good Luck Trent.  We are all with you on this battle.  Take it one day at a time and get back to the basics.  We have a great Sunday Morning Weigh In that you can check in on if you need some encouragement or inspiration.   This journey is a life long marathon and you just happen to be heading up hill for now.  Keep plugging along and don't lose faith.  You know that you can do it and how good you feel at the lower weight.  It is truly worth the battle!!  All the best, Mike

Trent, you bring up some very good issues that I've been worried about. I'm 1 year post-op from RNY and am scared the weight will start coming back.

Some things I'm doing is making sure I weight myself daily. My docs goal weight for me was 200 lbs. My personal goal was 190 lbs. My body decided to stabilize at 180 lbs. So, I try to keep within a range of 180-185 lbs. If I start seeing the weight creep close to 185 lbs, then I try and figure out what I'm doing wrong.

I also still log all my food in-take using MyFitnessPal. It has an app (free) that I've downloaded on my phone. I've set my goal in-take and track how I'm doing daily. Also recording my daily exercise.

The Sunday Weigh-In is a great place to keep track of things. I've really found it helps keep me accountable. I typically only participate every couple of weeks since there's not much movement. But it's helpful for me to keep track of things.

You've had a lot of health challenges lately and I'm sure it's been frustrating. Regaining weight has been a hot topic in the support forum for my local clinic.  My docs and nurses claim that RNY can be a long-term solution. They said if you start gaining again go back to the post-op basics. Measure your portions, track your food, increase your exercise and try to have all your meals 70% protein and 30% vegetables.

They also suggest 80 g of protein per day for a man. But, they caution AGAINST drinking your protein. Their belief is that liquid protein drinks easily pass through the pouch and you don't get that full feeling that is necessary. So, try to increase protein-rich foods and minimize the protein drinks.

With all your complications I'm assuming the docs have done full blood work-ups. But, make sure you're getting all your vitamins - especially B which isn't typically stored in the body. Look at your iron and calcium to make sure those are at the proper level.

Best of luck and keep us posted.