I screwed up and need a kick in the as* !

2 weeks post op.  Whatever reason, no reason really....but had a bad attitude this evening, this is normally the time pre-surgery I would hit the kitchen for my "food fest"....its storming out so couldnt go for a walk...so what did I do....I bought a pack of cigarettes.  arhggggg! I have not smoked for almost a year. Now feel guilty I screwed up so early in this process.  What the heck is wrong with me! I know exactly what smoking can do when I am not even healed up yet from the surgery. I want to eat when Im not even hungry and food goes in suprisingly easy. This is frustrating. I dont want to blow this chance! I dont have mental health issues....why am I so angry....guess I never knew it would be this hard not to have food in my life. The surgery itself was so easy.

Mike,

First off put down the cigarettes.  They slow you body's healing from the surgery.  Besides that they make you and your surroundings all funky smelling.  FYI:  I quit ten years ago.

Secondly food, or eating, was your source of comfort under stress.  Now that you can not use it for such you are having "withdrawal" symptoms.  The hormone dumping as you are in ketosis does not help the emotional roller coaster you are riding either.  Makes it worse.  Need to find a substitute behavior for stressful times.  Deep breathing, taking a walk, going to the gym, making whoopee whatever you have to do to cope.

Please don't take the following as judgment of you but based on being three and half years out, my own personal journey and having been on OH as long.  You say you don't have mental health issues - it would not hurt a thing to go to a professional to let them "pop the hood" and see what is going on underneath.  You might be surprised to learn how much unnecessary crap you are dealing with.  WLS tends to draw a lot of things to the surface.

 Hi Mike P,  I'm with Don.  Throw those cigarettes away.  Your body is still heeling and you don't need anything getting in the way of that (especially cigarettes).  Addiction transfer is VERY REAL and you really don't want your food addiction to become a cigarette addiction.  If I were you I'd call my behavioral psychologist and schedule an appt as soon as possible.  It will not hurt at all and may give you that little extra that you need.  I have been where you are and believe me it wasn't easy.  I kept a lot of protein shakes handy and drank them slowly and mindfully and before I knew it my stomach urge/craving was gone and I was able to move on.  There is no miracle cure for what you are going through but we all know what got us to the point where we needed surgery and now is your chance to kick that thing in the balls and move forward to your new life!!    We are all here for you so stay strong and post whenever you need it as there is always someone on these boards.

As someone who smoked for 14-ish years, and quit 2 years ago with the help of Chantix (shamless endorcement) I will tell you that I know how hard it is to not smoke.  Like I said, I quit 2 years ago and there hasn't been a single day that I haven't thought about smoking.  Pile on top of that that today was my 30 day follow up from my VSG surgery, and certainly there is alot of stress going on.  However, you have to be strong and stick with it.

You posted on here that you needed a kick in the butt...  Well, by posting that you have already admitted to yourself that you were on the wrong path.  Now take that and carry it forward.  Stay on the right path and you will be glad you did.  I have a few folks in my life that encourage me everyday.  It makes it easier.  If you don't have that, come on here and we will be that for you.  When you think about smoking, tell someone who you know will tell you not to, and encourage you to maintain your course, and it will help!  I promise!  

Hang in there.  I am already seeing a huge change in my life.  I am only a month out.  It is super cool, and every milestone I hit only helps re-inforce my "good behavior".

Drop the smokes and pick up a better habit! 

Oh, and KICK!!! (in the butt)