Very Uncomfortable

I have lived my whole life without trying to draw attention to myself.  I hate being the center of attention.  Well while my decision to have surgery was probably the best decisio I have made it recent years it hasn't really helped my confort level with being the center of attention.  I know this isn't going to change anytime soon but I really do not know how to deal with being the center of attention.  I am still at that point where little changes make a big difference in appearance.  Until recently I have nevr been complimented on my apearance and now it seems to be the subject whenever I walk into a room. 

As if dealing with the diet and having to live by a drink timer, and the various other things I ned to follow as a result of my surgery isn't overwhelming enough.  I know this will continue for many more months as everyone around me is very supportive of what I have done, but at he same time I want to lock myself in my room.

The extra attention is part of the mind f**k that goes along with WLS.  If they are family and close friends you might have to take them aside and ask them to slow their roll on the compliments.  They may not realize you are embarrassed by the extra attention.  I never liked anybody telling somebody, strangers in particularly, that I was a police officer when I was in street clothes in public. 

It can be overwhelming at first around the people that you see often, but after a couple of months it will slow down.  Soon you will have lost enough weight that people won't recognize you and you will be able walk right by them without saying a word, and they won't have a clue it was you.  You will be incognito.

I tell people the mental side of WLS is harder than the physical side.  It can really throw you for a loop if you're not grounded.  Soon you'll have beautiful women coming up to you and saying hello.  You're thinking..."What's going on??  Where were you when I was over 300 pounds??"  After awhile it will settle down, but for now it's a mind trip...  Brian  PS  You'll start to get treated better in business situations too.

Continue to post here and get our support.  You may want to  ask your surgeon's office or your primary if they can recommend a therapist to occasionally work with you.  I wouldn't say this if you just said you were feeling a bit awkward as you go through these physical changes.  But, you say that you hate being the center of attention.  Since you will only be having drastic weight losses for a limited time, you probably wouldn't need the help of a therapist for long.  I don't think you are depressed so I don't think you need to see a shrink.  But, your insurance will probably approve you to see a theapist (with a copay)..  Check with your ins because some plans allow youto just go and see a plan therapist while others want pre-approval from the plan.

I agree with Paul...I don't want to be the center of attention, especially about my weight.  People who never said a word to me when I was obese feel very free to give me the third degree. 

The usual opening question, "Have you lost weight?" 

My standard response, "No, it's not lost.  I know right where it went and I don't want to find it again." Laugh...ha ha ha

Next question, more probing... "How did you loose so much?" usually in tone of interrogation

My in my mind response, "It's none of your friggin business A _ _ Hole who never gave me the time of day before."

My more respectful response, "A lot of hard work...High protein, small portions, exercise, and a lot more hard work.  Have a nice day (Smile)."

I also agree the decision to WLS was one of the top 3 decisions in my life.  But, it was my (and my wife's) decision.  It's nobody else's business.