Guys whats really going on

 That reminds me of when I would eat out as a pre-op ..  It's bad enough eating out alone as a guy, but when you're S.O. AND alone you don't exactly get white-glove service.   

  A couple of times I remember eating at a place like Denny's and sitting and sitting there after I had been seated ..  Servers and busboys going by and nobody coming to take my order, despite the fact there were only a few customers in the whole place.  It was like I was invisible or something.  On one of those occasions I just got up and left, and later complained to their HQ.      I guess the chit hit the fan (it needed to) . . I heard the district manager came in with a "training video" for them to all have to watch on attentive service.  I heard they even were shown surveillance cam footage of me sitting at my table for over 20 minutes w/o getting my order taken.     I got a very nice apology letter from HQ and a gift cert. for like $50 worth of free food, btw.

  Now when I go out to eat alone I find the servers (esp. the gals) sitting down on the opposite side of my table to take my order, almost like they are flirting with me  ..  Managers doing the same thing, like they actually enjoy talking to me about things  ..   The last cuople of times (once at Red Lobster and another time at Chili's, IIRC) the greeter started to seat me in the bar area (never had that happen before) ..  I guess they just assumed I was there to find me an "eating companion" ..       Sad but true, the "before and after" difference in society ..  

 

Wow.. well put, I couldnt have said these things any better and I can relate to ALL of them..  

While it is a definitie shift and I agree, on the one hand a bit irriating; you keep blowing people off and holding a grudge; one thing is for sure.  You will be isolated and ostrisized once again only because of your attitude instead of your size. 

I'm not recommending you be equallly shallow or fake, but you might consider not having to be rude about it.

I see it too but use it as a compliment to my secret accomplishment and as motivation to want that kind of reception and treatment to motivate me to not go back to the obese me habits and life.  Just a thought.

 Don't mean to sound like Neil Diamond, but, "I've been this way before ..."  Uniteddude ..   

  At some point you'll also get to where you want to tell others that were like you to look at WLS too ..  You don't want to see them go down that short, dark road of M.O. or S.O. the rest of their lives, esp. people you care about ..  

   I think the furthest out "phase" of my journey was when I was experiencing almost a feeling of "survivor's guilt" ..  I had posted about it on here back then  --  about having felt like I shouldn't be alive ..  But for my WLS, a miracle of modern medical science, I'm still here though ...  and maybe taking the spot of someone who would have lived if they could have gotten their weight under control in time ..  I don't know how else to put the feeling in words ..  It's strange ..  

   

Thanks all. 2010 turns the next chapter. All else will be behind me. Cheers