TOP 10 THINGS I DISCOVERED SINCE WLS
Post Date: 8/4/09 11:29 pm
10. Able to buckle my seat belt with out an extension and not have the steering wheel rub my stomach when I drive. Haven’t driven into one ditch lately, compared to before, trying to turn a corner as I sucked in my gut as much as I could, and figure how to turn the steering wheel with my stomach in the way. Gez, that can get a guy confused, trying to do all that at the same time, then it can make you dizzy, trying to suck all that in! Those ditches really jump up at ya! 9. Am able to actually sit in a booth. It is weird because I would have to make my family wait for a table to open up. People looked at me strange that first time I tried a booth and fit because I kind of was bouncing up and down a little in the seat of this booth (the seats are softer than the wooden chairs at the tables), had a huge grin on my face, just looking around. When I locked eyes with someone, I mouthed to them, “I’m sitting in a booth!" They didn’t seem as excited about that as I did. PEOPLE! Who can figure them out. 8. Am able to walk without feeling like I am about to drop dead of a heart attack, and able to walk without falling because my legs would just give out on me, then taking 10 minutes to try and get up off the floor. One time when I fell, I landed on my back and rocked myself asleep trying to get up! 7. Am able to see these things at the end of my legs while I am standing. Been so long that I have actually seen my feet in “action" (i.e. moving). I forgot how awesome it is. Used to only see the puffed-up things when I was sitting. In relation I found out I have “ankles" right above the feet. I saw them one time in a book, but thought I had missed out. 6. Boomer (my Boston Terrier) is able to lay on me when I sit. There is room! I had to look it up, because I don’t have long term memory anymore, and I found out the medical name is a “LAP". I’ll be darn, I have one now. Used to be my stomach just touched my knees when I sat, so this new found “LAP" thing is amazing! 5. My dreams have gone from what I can stuff down my throat next, and how to get out of “moving", to going to an amusement park, walking around, and being able to ride the rides, especially a roller coaster. Now recently, I’m wanting to parachute out of an airplane. Amazing since the last time I tried to fly, the wheels wouldn’t turn and we couldn’t take off. It was really strange, because they worked after I got off! 4. Having a belt that is shorter than I am tall. Anybody hold up their belt even with the top of your head, and it drags the floor? 3. Able to save a year’s salary on clothes. Big man shops are HUGELY expensive (pardon the pun), and a shirt costs more than a small car because of it taking a BOLT of material to make the darn thing. I love that I can now buy clothes at Wally World, and even cooler, I was able to find some shirts at a thrift store dirt cheap. Love dirt cheap! 2. In relation to #3, I can get more sleep, because I don’t have to get up an extra hour early to iron my clothes! Takes a lot of time to iron the same amount of material they make a family tent out of! One time my wife found an ad from a woman who ironed clothes. She tried her out, but when we picked up the first patch, she said she was going to have to charge DOUBLE for my clothes because of the massiveness! Told her , “FINE, don’t need you, I can iron my own tents". 1. And the No. 1 thing I’ve found out during my year since WLS, is, what I thought was a big downside to WLS. I had discovered these “hard" things all over my body under my skin. I started to panic, and got on the net to do some medical research on them. I found out that they weren’t a cause of WLS, but supposedly had them all the time! It’s these things called BONES! Who’d thunk! Again that lack of long term memory had caused me, I guess, to forget about these bone things. All I could feel before was “softness". Found some of these things right along my shoulders. That one is called a collar bone. Down just a little further, was a bunch of them lined up. Found out those are called ribs. Just goes on and on all the way down to my feet. Also during the research, I found out the long thin “bluish worms" on my hands and arms are called veins. Didn’t know I had those either. At first I thought I had been swimming in some nasty river in Africa and picked up something. Isn’t the body an awesome thing?
10. Able to buckle my seat belt with out an extension and not have the steering wheel rub my stomach when I drive. Haven’t driven into one ditch lately, compared to before, trying to turn a corner as I sucked in my gut as much as I could, and figure how to turn the steering wheel with my stomach in the way. Gez, that can get a guy confused, trying to do all that at the same time, then it can make you dizzy, trying to suck all that in! Those ditches really jump up at ya! 9. Am able to actually sit in a booth. It is weird because I would have to make my family wait for a table to open up. People looked at me strange that first time I tried a booth and fit because I kind of was bouncing up and down a little in the seat of this booth (the seats are softer than the wooden chairs at the tables), had a huge grin on my face, just looking around. When I locked eyes with someone, I mouthed to them, “I’m sitting in a booth!" They didn’t seem as excited about that as I did. PEOPLE! Who can figure them out. 8. Am able to walk without feeling like I am about to drop dead of a heart attack, and able to walk without falling because my legs would just give out on me, then taking 10 minutes to try and get up off the floor. One time when I fell, I landed on my back and rocked myself asleep trying to get up! 7. Am able to see these things at the end of my legs while I am standing. Been so long that I have actually seen my feet in “action" (i.e. moving). I forgot how awesome it is. Used to only see the puffed-up things when I was sitting. In relation I found out I have “ankles" right above the feet. I saw them one time in a book, but thought I had missed out. 6. Boomer (my Boston Terrier) is able to lay on me when I sit. There is room! I had to look it up, because I don’t have long term memory anymore, and I found out the medical name is a “LAP". I’ll be darn, I have one now. Used to be my stomach just touched my knees when I sat, so this new found “LAP" thing is amazing! 5. My dreams have gone from what I can stuff down my throat next, and how to get out of “moving", to going to an amusement park, walking around, and being able to ride the rides, especially a roller coaster. Now recently, I’m wanting to parachute out of an airplane. Amazing since the last time I tried to fly, the wheels wouldn’t turn and we couldn’t take off. It was really strange, because they worked after I got off! 4. Having a belt that is shorter than I am tall. Anybody hold up their belt even with the top of your head, and it drags the floor? 3. Able to save a year’s salary on clothes. Big man shops are HUGELY expensive (pardon the pun), and a shirt costs more than a small car because of it taking a BOLT of material to make the darn thing. I love that I can now buy clothes at Wally World, and even cooler, I was able to find some shirts at a thrift store dirt cheap. Love dirt cheap! 2. In relation to #3, I can get more sleep, because I don’t have to get up an extra hour early to iron my clothes! Takes a lot of time to iron the same amount of material they make a family tent out of! One time my wife found an ad from a woman who ironed clothes. She tried her out, but when we picked up the first patch, she said she was going to have to charge DOUBLE for my clothes because of the massiveness! Told her , “FINE, don’t need you, I can iron my own tents". 1. And the No. 1 thing I’ve found out during my year since WLS, is, what I thought was a big downside to WLS. I had discovered these “hard" things all over my body under my skin. I started to panic, and got on the net to do some medical research on them. I found out that they weren’t a cause of WLS, but supposedly had them all the time! It’s these things called BONES! Who’d thunk! Again that lack of long term memory had caused me, I guess, to forget about these bone things. All I could feel before was “softness". Found some of these things right along my shoulders. That one is called a collar bone. Down just a little further, was a bunch of them lined up. Found out those are called ribs. Just goes on and on all the way down to my feet. Also during the research, I found out the long thin “bluish worms" on my hands and arms are called veins. Didn’t know I had those either. At first I thought I had been swimming in some nasty river in Africa and picked up something. Isn’t the body an awesome thing?
SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKIES - NOT REALLY GOOD FOR ANYTHING BUT THEY BRING A SMILE TO YOUR FACE WHEN PUSHED DOWN THE STAIRS.
Thanks soooooo much for this post. I am 3 days Pre-Op and am nervous and thinking "What the hell am I doing?". Not that I'm thinking of backing out.. no way !! But... You added some much need levity on a real level.
Again... Thanks so much and can't wait to experience all 10 of these items.
Brendan :)
Again... Thanks so much and can't wait to experience all 10 of these items.
Brendan :)
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