Haters. I cannot stand people who speak on subj. they do not know.

Ok, went to family reunion yesterday and a someone in the family asked my wife cant you talk him out of having this surgery. She was shocked but said nothing hoping she would not say anything to  me. She came to me and said I really wish you would not have this done. I said why. She said everyone she knows who has this done had gained all the weight back. I said this is not a fix all but a tool but if they did not use the tool then yes you will gain it back but its a tool they can use again. She kept running her trap which pissed me off so finally I said if you dont know what you talking about  to shut your f***ing trap. So I walked  back in told my mom to talk to her to shut her trap which pissed her off at me. Why must people speak of things they do not understand.

 I can sympathize with you.  My wife and I both had to go through it with our surgeries.  Now those same neysayers mouths drop everytime that they see us as I've lost almost 90 lbs in nine weeks and my wife has lost 66 lbs in eleven weeks.  Not only are we slimmer but we're much more healthy now and we've only just begun.  Hold your head up high and tell them to f-off...you know what you're doing and failure is not an option!
Duane 

A few things off the top of my head.  She is out to lunch.  Over a million...I want to say millions of people have now had these proceduces.  They are not expermental at all.  Years and years of study and follow up has been done and documented on the success and failure of these proceduces.  The surgeons have figured out what works and what doesn't (from say 5-10 years ago).  Men...esp young men lose the weight faster and tend to keep it off longer (they can move better than women...bigger muscle structure).  Twenty years ago people would freak out when they heard about heart bypass surgery.  "They're taking a vain from your leg and putting it on your heart!!"  "Are you nuts!!"  Now we think nothing of it...it extends life and people get more oxygen to their hearts.  Bad news travels 3 times faster than good news.  Most WLS people are just out there in society blending in and haven't drawn attention to themselves...Only the problem patients get heard...very loud and clear.  Brian

I felt like I needed a t-shirt that said "thanks for your concern but I'll be fine".  Some people just want to look like they know more than the rest of us. We all have those folks in our families.
Bet she won't offer un ask for advise to you again.
David

Its really hard to take a defensive stance when you know that negative comment is coming from a place of caring. The only thing I feel you can do in a situation like that is to listen note their concern and use to opportunity to educate. You may never win over a person like that but, you never know in a year if you see her and she notices the change in you,, You just might turn her around.

Its really not something thats worth getting worked up about... This is something that I run into even now that I have had surgery..... I've gotten used to it.

This is the exact reason why i chose to keep my surgery close to the vest, i told only a very few close friends and family members and my boss (who had a RNY 3 months prior to me)...

i am with you.

The people I didn't tell see that I am dropping and want advice so they can lose too.  6 one way 1/2 a dozen the other

You give them a choice:

1: I'd appreciate your concern and support getting through this;
or 2: Since you can't be supportive, MYOFB.

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