What suprised you after surgery - the not so good

Marc, Congratulations on taking steps to make change happen in your life! As Charlie said above, one of the hardest things I have found is to make myself stop eating when I first feel full.  I, too, always want to take "one more bite" and then end up uncomfortable for a while.  I'm still working on it...it seems to take a while. Another thing that I still have issues with is that the guy in my mirror still seems to be 375+... I just had this conversation with another guy who had surgery last week.  I always thought that women were the ones who had "body image" issues, but it turns out I have them, too.  I update my numbers here regularly, so I know that I have lost over 80 pounds since beginning this trip, but when I look in the mirror, I'm still seeing the same fat guy that I've been for so many years.  I assume that over time, with patience this will start to change, but not much so far.  I still tend to pick out clothes (from my own closet) that are too big.  I still avoid trying on some clothes in my closet that have been too small for a long time.  I just can't seem to get it through my head that I'm not still that size.     One last thing - for the pure surprise factor, nothing beats the first time you visit the porcelain throne and the twins are actually swimming...  man, tha****er is cold.  I read about this phenomenon here in the Locker Room, but until you actually experience it yourself, it's hard to believe how shocking it can be. Best of luck in pursuing your surgery.  Seems like you are taking the right path in doing all the research you can to make sure you know what you're in for.  You've certainly come to the right place to get the plain truth.   John

Gonna be honest Marc... I didn't read the other posts here, because I wanted to just tell you my thoughts on this.  First time I've posted in awhile.  Had some majorly kewl stuff happening and alot of just normal stuff...  I'm only 4 months out.... so here goes: What I "deal" with now: 1) Loose / extra skin - I got it.  Even now. I knew it was coming and it's not so bad.  But it's something to deal with.  Not very noticeable with normal clothing on, but it's a bothersome thing for me. 2) Clothing costs - I wish I had prepared a little more for the buying of new clothes.  I owe alot to Kohl's department store.  Their clearance racks / sales have been SO awesome for me.  Working in the professional enviornment that I do, I have to make sure that my clothing meets the requirements.  Has cost me a little... but then again... learn to shop for bargains.  (and don't try to guess how long you will be or won't be able to wear a certain size) 3) the FARTs - ok, this isn't so much as a "deal" with thing.. but it is for me.  I'm still having to learn how to take someone saying "holy hell man!" or one of the office ladies saying "You are looking SO handsome!"  Learning how to deal with compliments is something that's fun, but can also make you feel uncomfortable. 4) Learning Curve - I'm still trying to learn how to eat.  Like I read in a previous post today, I too have trouble "feeling full".  I'm eat by the clock or weight right now.  I found that I can eat an enormous amount of peel & eat shrimp (did a pouch test with this and ate damn near a pound), but only 4oz or so of chicken breast (baked).  I don't think I've eaten anything on the bad list, but I have overeaten and it's not pleasant.  (which is GOOD!), but I don't want to do it again. 5) Side pain - I'll write a post about this later, but I'm having a pain in my side, kind of under my rib cage.  My research tells me it's most likely my gall bladder, which is a common problem after RNY surgery.  I've not approached the doc with it yet, but that'll come very soon. 6) Thinking about food - I think more about food now than I did before.  This part scares the hell out of me.  I'm thinking about food now because I have to eat on a schedule (per my program) and of course eat the right stuff.  So I'm spending alot of time trying to make sure I've got something that I can eat (to prepared or already prepared).  I hate this part. 7) Hormones(?) - Something I've read about that I think effects me as part of this surgery.  I hope other read this post far enough to give some info here.  I found myself having a very short temper, being very emotional (on GOOD and bad things).  So I went looking to see what this was about.  It appears hormones are stored in fat.  Losing weight = burning fat = hormone output.  Hence, more testastrone in the system (especially early on) which leads to a bit more of a roller coaster of emotions at times, etc.  That's about it for me.  But let me tell you.  Even with "dealing with" those few items..  I can counter each one with about 5 per of PROs.  My only regret is that I waited as long as I did before moving forth with surgery.  A few points of change in the last year for me: - lost 90lbs - quit smoking - off ALL my medicines (diabetic, blood pressure, cholestrol) - bloodwork came back as a normal person - A1C level was 11.2 in Dec07, was 5.5 in May08 - able to purchase a new vehicle and house (mainly because of the money saved from lack of medicines, fast food, cigarettes, large food portions, etc

The wierd things are how you relate differently with other people.  While you change who you are, it seems like others are changing around you.  You do change a bit, personality wise. Also, I hear a lot more fat jokes now.  People don't tell fat jokes to fat people.

Marc, I’m about 4 days away from being 5 years post-op, So my perspective will vary from some of the others in the thread. Early on?  The learning curve can be a biotch. Stuff like, stopping eating BEFORE you get too full, Missing favorite foods from the past, gastric distress, (gas and constipation, etc) Most all of those become non-issues. About the time one gets near goal, The “Loose-Skin” becomes an issue. I had about a 3 inch fold at my belt-line. All of the rest drew up nicely.  I had no loose skin on chest or arms, thighs, etc… I had a panniculectomy to remove the extra skin at my waist. It was great. Long-term drawback? I no longer have an excuse for when I want to be lazy. I’m in great health, (even though I still have a torn rotator cuff) and don’t have the excuse of “being exhausted” when I Don’t want to do something. Most of the “issues” that people present Aren’t really an issue once they get further out. NSAIDs?  Most long-term RNY Post-ops, When an NSAID is needed Aare given prescriptions for NSAIDs to be taken with an anti-acid or a Nexium, prilosec or such. Constipation?  Normal Bowel function returns to those who Eat balanced healthy dietary intake. Dumping Syndrome? Yep, If I chose to eat a bunch of sugar I can trigger it still. Fortunately my sub-conscious quickly connected sweets To “un-desirable feelings” and as such I have lost my ‘taste’ for sweets.

Short term- There can be MAJOR DRAWBACKS (*see my profile) But, for the vast majority, Long-term results are worth it. (Your mileage may vary) Also, check other WLS Sites… (Particularly ones that are not completely driven by Surgical and Bariatric supply Commercial Sponsors.  Yes?) Check out- http://www.renewedreflections.com/forums/ or the only non-profit WLS site- http://quixoticwls.org/forums/ or http://fatblog.org/ more Lap-Band-Centric or even- http://www.livingafterwls.com/ (alot of articles/info) Hope you find all of the info you are looking for! Best Wishes- Dx

My journey so far has been smooth sailing.  My suggestion is getting your head into the right spot before you go into the OR.

Dealing with smaller portions has been a mixed  blessing.  It feels good to be satisfied with only a small plate of food, but there are times it would be great to eat the way I used to, but this passes quickly.  I miss the foods we can no longer have, soda, ice cream, cake etc.  But these are the foods that caused me to require my surgery in the first place. I have not chewed my food well enough on a couple of instances and have gotten the foamies and felt horrible for about an hour.  I also really miss drinking with my food, I am starting to get used to this a little.

Before surgery I knew that I would have to get regular exercise, I thought this would be really hard for me.  I have been working out about 5 days a week since I was 5 weeks post op.  when I don't go to the gym now, I miss it and don't feel as good.

The biggest issue for me was pre-op.  I can't believe the number of people who think they know what is best for you better then you do.  I had so many people try to talk me out of this, luckily my family was 100% behind me.  But this made me all the more certain I was doing the right thing, as I went through my thought process.  Also so many people thought I was rushing into this, it took me at least 4 years to decide to do this.  One woman at work would wail, "I don't want you to have surgery!!!" every time I walked into the room.  Now people just try to tell me I am loosing to much weight.  I am looking pretty good with clothes on, but when I get out of the shower I see that there is still more to loose.

Other people have commented on how other people treat them differently.  I have also noticed this, but I am treating myself differently.  I have felt so empowered since deciding to get control of my weight and that has really changed my attitude about the world around me and myself.  

Jim 

wow..i'm never ceased to be amazed at how the Men's board will step up to the plate, and really give you more than you asked for..from all different sides... I'm a little over 3 years out...on the bad side...I don;t beleive anyone could have told me...I know they did...but I didn't understand ....could not have understood...how important food was in my life...how my life revolved around food..at lunch we would talk about what we were going to have for dinner... so then you can't eat like that...so what do you do with yourself...I got this big gap..with nothing to do....Ok i'm not hungry...what do I do till bed time...everything is done....and I still have time...it seemed like I got bored...then I was tired...there is a little "golly gee" phase...oh look I had WLS...gee giggle...then life sets in and you go WTF..and I'm a firm believer that the WTF phase lasts till you have your 3 month weigh in...and the scale has a major drop...then you go....I can do this!!!! I did have an anger phase...I was a beast...I became a food nazi...telling people how bad they were eating...to this day, I can not eat in a group...the chatting over a fine meal...I will get caught up running my trap, and end up yakking or feeling bad... I do good with leftovers..so I just box them up...eat them in quiet...where i'm not rushed...it's not good it's not bad...it just is... The Dairy Queen calls to me sometimes...Russ Come get a nut buster parfait...and at first you want it...but them it's like a chick with the crabs...no matter how hard up your are...you know it ain't worth it... god I love this board

Lots of great responses above. For me the two worst issues aren't really a big deal now. First, as others have mentioned, the first few days after surgery were no fun. I was unable to get out of bed or even turn over by myself. I hated that my wife had to help pull my fat azz up. That only lasted 3 days, but in the meantime I was worried that I had really messed myself up. Second, I was initially overwhelmed by the protein, the vitamins, the supplements, and on and on. When my Nut tried to explain all the stuff I would have to pay attention to I felt like i was going to pass out - there was no way I could keep up with all of it. However, after a few weeks it was not a problem. I don't have to focus on taking the right stuff, I have just integrated that into my routine. Now for the good stuff:  I am almost 1 year out and I just spent the weekend trimming trees, digging ditches, planting stuff, and power washing my deck. I was outside w/o a shirt and not ashamed. I hauled several hundred pounds of debris to my front yard - and I felt GREAT. Next weekend I am going to put in some fencing and clear the back lot. This is really amazing. Also I have gained a new level of respect for myself at work, and that carries over to other people. At home, my kids are very proud of me - I can wear my sons' clothes. Also, my wife and I can plan for the future with a greater likelihood that I will be around and active. It is really wonderful. Best wishes, Joe

Wow guys, I am sincerely grateful for the time it took each of you to answer.  I have spent so much time looking at all the positive things and knew I was glossing over the stuff that would be hard or difficult to handle. I know I tend to ignore the stuff that I don’t want to hear and this can really kick me in the butt. I know that none of these will change my mind about the surgery. But I do know it will help me work through it in a more positive manner.  I do not think I could thank each of you individually because there are so many points and each wrote a little differently and gave me something I needed to know. I really appreciate it. I now have a list that I can work on to approach the time after surgery. I am betting knowing when to stop is going to be a hard learned lesson and making a habit of preparing food. Damn I like take out of ANY kind! Thanks again guys I appreciate you effort and straight talk. No BS. Marc

 

I'm only 64 days post-op, but so far it hasn't been that bad for me, thankfully.  I really don't miss any foods that much - in fact, eating is now almost a pain in the azz.  I guess the main things for me are: 1) Finding foods that I actually want to eat. Some of the things I loved before WLS now make me want to barf if I just smell them. 2) Making myself eat real food. I find that I would just as soon down a protein shake or protein bullet and go on about my business. Nutritionist says I have to make myself eat real food.  3)  When I do eat. I find that I have to be careful and not get pre-occupied with talking, reading, or whatever to avoid eating too fast, not chewing my food enough or taking to big of a bite. 4) Not drinking when I eat was a little bit tough, but is getting easier. Still, I am down 61 pounds post-op and 94 pounds since Feb. 9. No way I could have done this well without WLS.  It has and is worth the price to me!

Probably that I can eat a lot more of many things than I wanted to be able to. For example, a whole plate of nachos with cheese and bean dip is no problem. That said, because the Vagus nerve has been cut and there are also fewer hunger hormones (I suppose). I usually don't feel the need to eat a lot. And if I do eat a lot, I suppose because of the malabsorption I don't gain any weight.

No other negative surprises that I can think of. The RNY combined with exercise has been a proverbial fountain of youth.