Psych Stuff

Good evening gents. I'm feeling a little unsure and confused tonight. To recap, I started the WLS journey about a month ago. I've decided to go with RNY because of all the other health issues I have and I still think it's the right choice. What has me concerned is that I just read the ABC news story about Carnie Wilson gaining he weight back after RNY. (http://abcnews.go.com/Health/Fitness/Story?id=4444057&page=1) Now I know that WLS is not some magic that will make my slim for the rest of my life no matter what. I know that people can and do gain weight after WLS. I guess what has me concerned is that I've failed at so many weight loss attempts I don't want WLS to just be another failed attempt. My biggest problem is that food is like a drug for me. It pretty much rules my life. I'm struggling with the pre-op diet and have only lost about 9 LBS in the month I've been on the supervised diet. I use most any excuse to stay from the eating plan I should be following. When I get together with friends I want to eat, when family is in from out of town I want to take them to the great restaurants around town, birthdays, father's day, mother's day, you name it, I use it as an excuse to stray from a healthy eating plan that I'm supposed to be following. I've always told myself that after surgery my attitude toward food will change. In all honesty, I have no idea if that is true or not. I'm pretty sure that part of my journey needs to be some heavy psych work. Far more than the one time visit pre-op. I need to figure out why food has such a hold on me. Thanks for listening and for any words of encouragement you can offer. I hope I don't sound like a *****! Tonight has been a bit of a wake up call for me. At the rate I'm going, I may not even qualify for WLS and if I do, I'm terrified that I'll find a way to **** that up to. M.

Well firstly you have to realize that Carnie Wilson is a professional eater and is an idiot. You will learn how to eat correctly and hopefully avoid stupid mistakes that Carnie Wilson chose to make after her WLS.

Since you're preop, I'll ask... you said you've decided on RNY.  Have you considered the DS? (or for that matter, have you even heard about the DS?) based on your fears, I think if you do a little research, you'll find that the DS has the best statistics for weight loss and post-op weight regain. Also, you mentioned "all the other health issues I have"... what are they?  if they include Diabetes, high cholesterol, high triglycerides, (and a few others that slip my mind at the moment) your research will also show the DS has the best statistics for resolution of those problems as well. If your health issues include arthritis, or other ailment which requires NSAID (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs) for pain management, you will find that with the DS, you will still be able to take your Aleve, Advil, Excedrin, etc. to manage the pain, where with the RNY you can't (or at least SHOULDN'T). At the very least, discuss your other health issues with Dr Ganta and ask him if you might be better served by the DS... we have a few of his post-op patients over on the DS board if you'd like to pop in to ask there. Of course, no WLS is fool-proof or unbeatable... but the design of the DS does make it much harder to beat. Whatever you decide, good luck.

M. I hate to tell you, your not unique. You're echoing th same desires, concerns and weaknesses that I would say the majority of us have or had.  This is what I've come away with through my reading and asking questions. Let me state I had RNY 4/1/8 and have been very happy with it.  So this is what I'm most comfortable in discussing.  WLS not only restricts your quantity of food it changes how you eat, small bites or it's coming back up, no drinking before or after meals, chew, chew, chew, low fat high protein, no sweets.  In other words the way everyone should eat.  The first year seems to be the honeymoon period, the desire for food the taste and smell of foods change.  Its here were if you want long term success you follow the guidelines established by your WLS team. To were it becomes a habit. So after the honeymoon you've already establish good habits and as your pouch stretches your not going to need the same will power you needed before WLS.  I feel there are several components in being successful long term, and they are. Use WLS surgery as a tool to change years of bad habits, IE. graze eating, boredom eating and depression eating are just a few examples.  Next you have to get off your butt and do some kind of exercise. Third support groups weather here or in person, but get involved, meet others who won't allow you to backslide, keep each other accountable. Fourth if you have emotional issues, seek medical help, food is not the answer.

C'ya Bob

M, What’s great is that you are planning for this hurdle now, And not approaching your problem as if WLS is a Magic Fix. So often I have seen posted on the Boards- “The surgery is on your guts, not your head!” So, knowing that, you can get some “Head-Work” done at the same time. For someone who is Obese, the odds of losing and maintaining Through Diet and Exercise are this- 5% Success rate.  (and the majority of those gain back to a weight higher than before they started) For someone who is Obese, the odds of losing and maintaining Through Diet and Exercise supported/aided by Bariatric Surgery are this- 70% Success rate.  (and the majority of those with re-gain, never even come close to the weight they were prior to surgery.) Now with Carnie Wilson? Well other than the fact that she also had a pregnancy thrown in there, (a pot-hole you most definitely fall in) She started at 300lbs.  Lost Down to 148lbs. Now even after her “Failure in the Spotlight,” when she “blew up” to a whopping 218lbs, She is still maintaining an 82lb loss from her 1999 surgery. Coming up on a full decade and ‘the failure?’ Is having a near 1/3 of her weight gone. While working toward getting Medical intervention for your digestive system, Also find a good psychiatric counselor to work on your head. Over the past 6 years reading these Boards, (I’m a ‘multi-boarder) I’ve seen 1000’s of folks go through their personal journeys. I can count on one hand the ones who “Gained it all back.” Of those?  I don’t know of any who attacked their psyche issues in tandem with getting their surgery. At less than 3 weeks short of my 5-year ‘Surgi-versary,’ Food is still a part of my life, and an enjoyable one. I get together with friends to eat, when family is in from out of town, I take them to the great restaurants town, or cook myself, For birthdays, Thanksgiving, Mother's day, you name it. But now I eat the way other “Normal-Sized” men do By following a fairly healthy eating plan. Bar-B-Que, Steak, etc… Hell, even occasionally fried chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy, & biscuits. I just don’t pack it in like before, because I’m FULL on less. I don’t end my nights sitting on the couch snacking on chips and crap. Kudos to me?  Hell no!  The vast MAJORITY of people who had WLS Are doing the same. Likewise, the Vast majority of them attempted and failed multiple times At dieting prior to seeking WLS. The minority who have F’d-it-up as bad as Carnie Wilson? They are still about 2/3’s the size they were before their “Failure.” Yes? You’re dealing with common anxieties, and not “*****esque” in the least. Keep evolving your plan for success, and giving yourself as many Of these “Wake-up Calls,” But, Don’t be driven by your fears and anxieties, be driven by your goals. Particularly don’t make choices based on “Myths” concerning a procedure. Most of the 3+year RNY post-ops I know, DO take NSAIDS as directed by their Bariatric Surgeon. I have a torn rotator cuff, and have been taking Mobic (Meloxicam) for over 2 years, Because my Dr. prescribed it.  5 years with perfect labs, no mal-nutrition or vitamin deficiencies. I eat pretty much what I like, But used the first year to establish new habitual food choices. No gas or poop issues, and maintaining a Normal Range BMI of 23.6 to 24.4. Keep researching things that made WLS work well for others, as well as those things that have been stumbling blocks for others, And develop Your personal plan for success. Best Wishes- Dx [edited to add- started at 385+ BMI of 51, lost to goal by year one, lost to 179 over the next 2 months, and have been between 180 and 185 maintaining Normal BMI 4 years so far.]

Dx, DAMN, you're good! You haven't answered my question about how much water to use to dilute the New-Whey protein shots so they don't give me the drizzlies? Thanks, Don

Hi I am kalob had RNY on 4/30/2008  ashame to say I have been regreating doing this since the day I awoke in the hospital. I have been apologizing to God daily and for the first time to today in this very moment after reading your blog i feel better about what i have done.  THANK YOU FOR GIVING ME HOPE THAT I HAVN'T MADE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE...

Thanks for the responses. You guys are amazing! I refuse to let the failures of others paralyze me with fear. Mark

That's exactly right.  You can't let the actions of others determine your own success. You have the right attitude - the WLS is a tool for a healthy life, not the cure for obesity. Once that 18-24 month weight-loss window is gone, you still have to work to stay healthy, just like anyone else. It goes to the old saying - it's mind over matter .. they don't matter, and you don't mind.  Your success or failure will be determined by YOU and no one else. WLS is one tool - psych help can be another.  Support groups can help if you can find the right one.  The Men's board has helped me tremendously.   Just keep a positive outlook, do it the way you're supposed to afterwards (eat slow, protien first, exercise, and learn new, healthy habits.), and you can't help but succeed. Good luck, man!

She also has become a flaming alcoholic, by her own admission, replacing the addiction to food with booze. Then, I guess, back to food. I ate out of addictive behavior, too. Emotional eating. First month was hard, but I stuck to it (and, the pouch made me stick to it). After three months I've established new habits and ways to cope with the emotional triggers -- most effective, absolutely not eating on front of the tube. Also, literally changing my location when the urge strikes -- take a walk, a bike ride, go to the gym, swim, read a book outside, whatever it takes. And as the pounds come off, all that becomes easier to do, too. And then there's the point previously made: Carnie Wilson IS an idiot. You are not Carni Wilson, amigo. And if you need the help of a therapist, do it. Another tool. Better than misery.