Joke for the Day

Eddie_W
on 6/11/08 10:54 pm - FL
VSG on 04/16/08 with
John was a salesman's delight when it came to any kind of unusual gimmick. His wife Marsha had long ago given up trying to get him to change. One day, John came home with another one of his unusual purchases. It was a robot that John claimed was actually a lie detector. It was just about 5:30 that afternoon when Tommy, their 13 year old son, returned home from school. Tommy was over 2 hours late. 'Where have you been? Why are you over 2 hours late getting home?', they asked. 'Several of us went to the library to work on an extra credit project' said Tommy. The Robot then walked around the table and slapped Tommy, knocking him completely out of his chair. 'Son , this robot is a lie detector, now tell us where you went after school.' 'We went to Bobby's house and watched a movie.' 'What did you watch?' asked Marsha. ''The Ten Commandments.' answered Tommy. The Robot went around to Tommy and once again slapped him, knocking him off his chair. With lip quivering, Tommy got up, sat down and said, 'I am sorry I lied. We really watched a tape called Sex Queen.' 'I'm ashamed of you Son,' said John. 'When I was your age, I never lied to my parents.' The robot then walked around to John and delivered a roundhouse right that nearly knocked him out of his chair. Marsha was bent double laughing, almost in tears. 'Boy, did you ever ask for that one! And you can't be too mad with Tommy. After all, he is your son!' The Robot immediately walked around to Marsha and decked her too!
ianwen
on 6/12/08 1:12 am - Austin, TX
ROFL. thats a good one. heres another:

Ralph returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, Ralph asks his wife for sex.

 Naturally, she agrees, and they make love. About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, "Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?" Of course, the wife agrees and they do it again.

 Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes he now has only 8 hours left. He touches his wife's shoulder and asks, "Honey, please... just one more time before I die ?" she says, "Of course, dear." And they make love for the third time. After this session, the wife rolls over & falls asleep.

 Ralph, however, worried about his impending death, tosses & t urns until he's down to 4 more hours. He taps his wife, who rouses. "Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could....?"

  At this point the wife rolls over and says, "Listen Ralph, I have to get up in the morning... you don't.

Syn
on 6/12/08 8:47 am - Everett, WA
Oh... that's cold.

"
The American, by nature, is optimistic. He is experimental, an inventor and a builder who builds best when called upon to build greatly."                         
-John F. Kennedy
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