Did you have a "Moment of Clarity?"
Let's see... Snapping my toilet seat in half and breaking 3 seperate computer chairs (plastic wheeled legs). Not being able to bend over and tie my shoes. Ordering multiple sets of food from restaurants to satisfy my addiction with food.
I guess the biggest one would be having to be told in front of 100+ people at Six Flags that I had to get out of the roller coaster seat because the seat belt wouldn't fit and that I was too fat to ride. The shame that I endured as they had to stop the ride and get some tool out to manually release my section of carts so the lap bar would lift was embarrasing to say the least.
I fully realized before the surgery that if I didn't do something drastic like RNY that I would be dead within 10 years from being morbidly obese.
And similar to you, twenty months later and a grown fat man less in weight (254 pounds lost) I'm the happiest and healthiest I've been in my life.
Dan, Thanks for sharing. My moment of clarity. The one I remember best is leaving work one evening and walking up the hill of the parking lot. Even though my car was less than a block from the building, I had to stop five to six times before I got to the car. Two people asked if I was o.k. and of course I told them that I had twisted my ankle, not wanting them to know that I was probably minutes from a serious problem. When I got to the car, I sat for at least twenty minutes prior to starting it up and driving home. It convinced me that I needed to make a drastic change to if I wanted to see my 50th birthday. Over the next nine months, I got educated on the RNY and finally had my operation on Oct. 2003. Over the past four years, I have achieved more than I could ever have envisioned, and I'm happy and ready to take on the world. Rob
Dan,
I can definitely relate to the anger you felt, and yes that is part-and-parcel of the whole "obesity package" - it comes partially from our mistreatment by other members of society. In many ways, it is natural to be angry at being mistreated and abused, even if it is by a couple of kids. What kind of sh*t are they learning at home? But at the same time I think your incident at the school raises a bit of a conundrum. On one hand, you may have overreacted in a way that jeopardized your own freedom - not good. On the other, I feel a bit of a "twinge" that society today is supposedly all about "sensitivity" and "tolerance" and yet there was little concern about the behavior of the "darlings" on the jungle jim.
Imagine instead they had been using racial slurs (e.g., the "N-word") against a black man. Do you think the school would have threatened to bring charges (bet ya 5-bucks NO)? And BTW, so you got a bit testy, is that a good reason to throw YOUR KID out of school? We live in a society when getting angry by CERTAIN PEOPLE is not tolerated because hey, you could be the next "Una-Bomber" right? (extreme sarcasm). When we were kids, the principal could paddle my a*s for misbehaving like that, and when I got home, I would have received even more.
Herein lies the conundrum: on one hand, obesity adversely affects one’s social interactions, economic opportunities, and most importantly, health. On the other, I have experienced an attitude, even by health care providers, that I must "bow down" as the penitent fatty and lick the boots of the "man." To be subjected to such indignity has, at least in my case, served to keep me fat - perhaps a bit of rebellion. Yet I do so at the risk of my own health and sanity.
You are fortunate that your bariatric team didn't find out about the school incident. I was severely mistreated by one bariatric clinic (jerked around for 3 months, long story), and when I had the nerve to stand-up for myself was told I was argumentative and had "anger issues" - BANG, no surgery. BTW, if anyone's interested, my "anger issues" did not involve terroristic threats, physical violence, or even obscenity - I just know how to make my case, and there's nothing that the idiots hate more than a smart confident fat man.
On a more positive note, I am very, very happy that you were able to get the treatment you needed and that it made such a tremendous difference in your life. I have had several "moments of clarity" myself - many of which have already been ably outlined here already by others. But I would just like to say, don't ever be "ashamed" for having been obese. You were still a human being then as you are now Dan. And as such, you were and are entitled to basic human dignity and respect - as are we all.
Regards.
-- Oscar Wilde