The time machine

I did a bad bad thing the other day, I stole my sons 1979 Pontiac fire bird. I hadn't planed on doing this bad thing, it just sorta happened. You know how things just fall into place, and you find yourself with the opportunity to do something you wouldn't and probably shouldn't do. The day had started out innocently enough, it was a day like any other. I was taking out the trash, and happened to pass by my sons car parked in the driveway, and what do i see, but his keys dangling provocatively from the ignition.

I don't know how many times i have told him to not leave his keys in his car, but does he listen? No! Suddenly a little voice pops into my head. "you should hide his car." "That would teach him a lesson." I had talked myself out of doing this to him when that little voice spoke up again. "you know he won't hear you take it" "He was out all night with that crazy girl and will probably sleep all day."

Like in a dream, i watched myself open the door, climb in, and settle into the well worn seat. This was the first time i had sat in my sons car. I had been super obese when i helped him build it, and i had been too big to fit in it. The keys were warm to the touch from the mid morning sun. I turned the ignition and the old bird roared to life. My heart started to beat faster as i pulled the shifter into reverse. I scan ed the windows of the house for signs of life before i let my foot off the brake, and slowly rolled out of the driveway. The brakes squealed slightly when i stopped in the street, Had he heard me? Nervously i stared at the house. Finding no signs of life i dropped the shifter into drive and lightly pushed on the throttle. With a roar the car lept forward throwing my head into the seat. I didn't know the throttle was so touchy. In a flash i found myself at the end of the block facing the highway, adrenaline rushing through my veins. I looked to the left, then looked to the right, the road was clear. i eased out onto the blacktop and came to a stop on the center line. This was it, there was no turning back now, grasping the wheel so tight my knuckles turning white, I crammed my foot as hard as i could to the floor. Like a bolt of lightning the world around me exploded, the smell of gas fumes and burning rubber filled my senses. My body was thrown into the seat as the car started picking up speed at an alarming rate. Faster and faster it went until the speedometer pegged out at over 100 miles an hour,and still there was more. Mailboxes, and telephone poles were just a blurr, as the steel fire bird shook around me. At that point time stopped and began to roll backwards. My mind traveled back to when i stood before that big window at the hospital, gazing at that little pink bundle in the nursery. My wife had just given me a son. A son that i would someday teach to drive. Farther back my mind traveled. I traveled back to a simpler time when gas was only 75 cents a gallon, and the radio played bands like bread, and the cars. I suddenly felt sad that my boys will never be able to experience a warm summer night at the drive-in, or a ice cold root-beer from a frosted mug at the A&W.

Anyway later that day I was doing my third dough nut when the cops stopped me. Luckily I was able to talk my way out of a ticket when i explained that i was a time traveler, reliving my youth. All i had to do is listen to a speech about how i was old enough to know better, Yada Yada Yada. The fun was over, I was back in the year 2007, Gas was once again $2.85 a gallon, and i had just burnt up about $30.00 dollars worth of it traveling back to 1979. I stopped at the station and filled the tank, and slowly drove back to the house. I was greeted by my son, arms folded like my father used to do when he caught me coming home at three in the morning, the smell of cheep beer and perfume reeking from my clothes. I hope someday when he is my age he will look back and understand that us old guys need to time travel from time to time.