I say this; she says that. 'On Post Op' What you say?

Hey Bob... I'm a real passive aggressive MF, so since you wife is setting the standards...let her... "Baby, I really appreciate your support with all of this...Since I am having surgery on the 20th of August, that is the hard part, I want to make everything else easy on you.....what do you wanna do....?" Let her call the shots, hotel room, drive, no drive, kids in or out....you are getting what you want, surgery....that is the biggie...let her choose the rest.... Choose your attitude...with the driving...take a vicodin, and relax...the pain is not that bad...at least for me....hell your 250 mile drive, ain;t gonna hurt me a bit Ok that is my 2 cents.... Russ.... Geez, I must be getting  my bob's mixed up...I thought you were the old fart preacher....hmmmm...but a 7 and 9 year old..... R

I say go home. Your not going to be as comfortable in a motel as you will be at home.  I find motels boring. To be stuck in a motel for a week don't sound like fun. Play it by ear. If you get to feeling bad stop and get a room. Stop every hour for a walk and take a whiz. Don't forget to get the script filled for the pain pills. I would take the SUV. Paying for the extra gas will be worth the comfort for everyone.   When my wife drove me home It took us about two hours for a forty minute drive. She had to make some stops on the way home. I hadn't taken a pain pill yet but I was in very little pain. The next day I went to wally world with her. May have over done it a little. Walked around for an hour or so. I had one incision that hurt a little. If you stay at a motel you may decide after a day or two to get the hell out of there and go home. pan head

Bob, can you get someone to watch the kids a couple of days?  Then they wouldn't have to be out of school and you would have the flexibility to stay in a hotel and they wouldn't miss school.  250 miles is a haul right after surgery.  Getting someone to watch the kids for 4 days would take this away, even if you have to split them one to one friend and one to another.

You are right on Paul, it is a fear issue!  I never saw it coming.  I guess I'm fearful of complications in the first week and being far away from my surgeon.  I'm dealing with it, and yes, I will go home after surgery.  Thank you for your response and everyone else's also.  I appreciate your experience and friendship. BobM.

Hi Bob, I think you can safely go home. Just be sure to stop the car and walk every 45 min to an hour.   I understand your desire to be near your doc. So you might try one of the compromises the guys suggested of staying one night nearby. Your wife's probably worried about a bunch of stuff so you may need to be the "adult" on this--even though this is your special event. Relationships are complicated (don't we all know) and this is a nervous time all around. Paul hit th nail on the head re motel sanitation. They are germy places, especially bed covers, so try to minimize your post-op exposure to them. Good luck whatever you decide. You'll be okay and we'll be polishing up your spot on the Loser's Bench.

Bob, I kind of agree with Bob#2.  I had a 250 mile drive home.   I drove from the hospital parking lot about 50 miles (it was after 7:30pm when I was released).  I don't recommend driving, but I'm a little crazy and thought I'd rather try to drive than just sit.  Since, it was at night we stopped and got a motel room.  The next morning I drove home.   I stopped maybe 3 times for fuel, potty stop and a rest area for walking.  I was in the hospital for 3 days including surgery and was off my pain meds by the time I left the hospital.   Now, I did have discomfort, but no real pain. I think, like Bob mentioned take it easy, pull over get out walk around.   I started walking in the hospital, up and down the halls.  Walking truly helps.  Best of Luck.  We are counting the days for you. Mike Ray

You're probably not high risk.  I weighed 571 when I had my 1st RNY (I later needed a revision).  I had good heart, bp, no diabetes, but couldn't walk more than 50 ft.  Heck, I got out of breath just walking from one room to another.  I had a local surgeon refuse to operate.  I had to literally beg to have the surgery  with another surgeon.   It's one of the best things I ever did.  I've had a net loss of over 200 lbs.  I knew going in to this that my final weight would be higher than many men's initial weight.  But, the journey has been worth it to me.