Post op Discussion...unpleasent

I’d say it’s a bit ‘skewed’ by the very method of communicating. Wha?? Explaining…….I think that a Message Board where the poster perceives that She is in the presence of "like minded Gals," will post / state things that they would Never say face to face or in any other public manner. The assumption that it’s "Just Us Ex-Fat Girls Here" can create a bizarre paradigm that encourages some pretty bold statements. I’m also often ircked by the posts that seem to crop up daily, like- I swear I hate MEN!!! men suck! Husbands....GRRRRRRRRR Dealing with men! Venting! - men are such pigs Men are IDIOTS!! These were all just copy/pasted here from the Main. (I posted about this same subject over a year ago and snagged them then) They nearly always include the little hot-head emoticons. Most are posts about how Men (or specifically Their Man) don’t support them, offer them enough concern, etc… "I’m tired of being ignored! - He doesn’t know how I feel!" – "He doesn’t communicate…!!"…etc I used to want to reply- "Then get your Azz off the Computer and Go Talk to him about it!! Unless he’s a Female Bariatric Patient, ranting here won’t do any good!" But, that’s a bit like sucking on the end of a revolver. Why would they post such a thing? Because it is perceived that they will get a throng of (((hugz))) and "You Go Girl!"’s. "You are Worth More! You deserve Better!!" If someone wants compliments and attention, this is an option for receiving it that doesn’t require anything but a little typing. We don’t read the Husband / Boyfriend’s rant about how she spends without boundaries, throws drama fits at the home, flirts with the neighbor, complains about his family, leaves all of the bills for him to do, etc, etc, etc…. We read the one side description of a bad relationship/marriage. It may well be that she has coupled up with a "nare-do-well" and he’s a drunk and messed up boy trapped in a "she’ll make it all ok like a mommy should" fantasy of a relationship. But, he may also be exasperated by his "drama-lama" of a spouse who throws a hiss fit over any and all issues. Whether she’s actually a Diva-Biothce from He11 or a Saint yet to be named, the Board will never actually know. They get her side only. Even when presented as- "now that I’m a hottie, I’m too good for him!" the common reply is- "Good for you!" – "You’re Deserve Better!" – "You Go Girl!" I used to want to meet all of these loser men who were such abusive A-Holes just to pop ‘em in the teeth and say- "Dude! You give us a Bad Name!" But more and More I suspect they can’t possibly exist. I buy ‘Cameron’s’ reply. And I think that what is presented on the Board, would be skewed from the actual statistics or study results. There may be some notion that people who made bad lifestyle and food choices could also be prone to poor relationship choices, but if that were the case, the Men’s Board would also be crammed with "My Souse Done me Wrong!" posts. And even though the typical divorce rate has guys here who are divorced, it’s not presented as the Norm. There is a distinct absence of – "My Old-Lady is a Tramp…" Because to post such is a confession that "I’m a boob who hooked up with a Biotche!" What guy wants to call attention to his shortcomings…particularly when it comes to their spouse. If the Men posted- "I’m lookin’ Hot now and I’m too good for her! I put up with it before…" I’d bet that it would Not be an open gush of "Way to Go Dude!! Good for you!! Show ‘em!" There would more likely be "Sorry that it’s not working out for you, have you tried counseling? Your Minister?" "What a Wussy!" Totally different paradigm. Many here will post (have in the past) about how their wife was "The Bomb!" and how she carried them "through the rough times….." I’m married just over 26 years now and my wife introduces me as her "1st & 2^nd Husband." The common statement that "Extreme Weight loss can make a good relationship better and expose the worst of a bad one…" Can be said of a career change, death in the family, or any drastic stressful change. It is often said in Theater regarding reviews or critiques in the papers- "Nothing is ever as Bad or as Good as said to be." I think that is the case with such "I’m droppin’ this Loser Man…" posts. I think the "Tale is in the Telling." And it is often told so as to illicit the bushel-load of "You Go!"’s that the Board typically offers to Women. Interesting topic…. And refreshing that it’s not "Flame Central." Best Wishes- Dx