Friday Humor.
During a commercial airline flight a Navy Pilot was seated next to a young mother with a babe in arms.
When the baby began crying during the descent for landing, the mother began nursing the infant as discreetly as possible. The pilot pretended not to notice and, upon debarking, he gallantly offered his assistance to help with the various baby-related impedimenta.
When the young mother expressed her gratitude, the pilot responded, "Gosh, that's a good looking baby...and he sure was hungry!"
Somewhat embarrassed, the mother explained that her pediatrician said nursing would help alleviate the pressure in the baby's ears.
The Navy Pilot sadly shook his head, and in true pilot fashion exclaimed, "Damn! And all these years I've been chewing gum.
It was snowing heavily and blowing to the point that visibility was
almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her
car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car
while it warmed up and thought about her situation. She finally
remembered her daddy's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard she
should wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it. That way she would
not get stuck in a snow drift. This made her feel much better and sure
enough in a little while a snow plow went by and she started to follow it. As she followed the snow plow she was feeling very smug as they
continued and she was not having any problem with the blizzard
conditions. After an hour had passed, she was somewhat surprised when
the snowplow stopped and the driver got out and came back to her car and
signaled for her to roll down her window. The snow plow driver wanted to
know if she was all right as she had been following him for a long time.
She said that she was fine and told him of her daddy's advice to follow
a snow plow when caught in a blizzard. The driver replied that it was ok
with him and she could continue if she wanted, but he was done with the
Walmart parking lot and was going over to Sears next.
almost zero when the little blonde got off work. She made her way to her
car and wondered how she was going to make it home. She sat in her car
while it warmed up and thought about her situation. She finally
remembered her daddy's advice that if she got caught in a blizzard she
should wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it. That way she would
not get stuck in a snow drift. This made her feel much better and sure
enough in a little while a snow plow went by and she started to follow it. As she followed the snow plow she was feeling very smug as they
continued and she was not having any problem with the blizzard
conditions. After an hour had passed, she was somewhat surprised when
the snowplow stopped and the driver got out and came back to her car and
signaled for her to roll down her window. The snow plow driver wanted to
know if she was all right as she had been following him for a long time.
She said that she was fine and told him of her daddy's advice to follow
a snow plow when caught in a blizzard. The driver replied that it was ok
with him and she could continue if she wanted, but he was done with the
Walmart parking lot and was going over to Sears next.
Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, yelling "..........Holy Shit.......... what a ride".
In a recent Channel 4 news broadcast, it was announced that Lorena Bobbitt's sister Louella was arrested for an alleged attempt to perform the same act on her husband as her famous sister had done several years ago. Sources reveal the sister was not as accurate as Lorena.
She allegedly missed the target and stabbed her husband in the upper thigh causing severe muscle and tendon damage. The husband is reported to be in serious, but stable condition, and Louella has been charged with . .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. A Misdewiener!
Hey,
That's funny, but I always thought the name "bob it", acted as a subliminal message and caused her to perform an amputation on old John Wayne Bobitt.
Definition:
http://www.answers.com/topic/dock-tail-bob
Dave
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