Lack of Support is depressing

You are right, this particular one and most of the others have sought to govern me, of course they don't like me sharing about them either.  My chair is excellent leader and I lean on him to keep the level head.  Well, Mr. Lucifer is right there let me tell you.  I appreciate and can use your prayers. Thanks for sharing and for the support, and the saying is very meaningful for me today!

Pastor Bob.

Bob, Sorry to hear this was an unpleasant experience though I'm sure there were good intentions behind it.  Since you are the pastor, perhaps you can use your surgery as a testament of your faith.  Afterall, isn't your surgery outcome in the hands of God?  If it is his will to have you leave earth for heaven then it will be so whether you have the surgery or not.  He will be guiding the hands of your surgeon, the nurses and you (your ability to deal with the tool you will receive through surgery). I'm certain that you have a caring heart and that your mission on earth is not done and that you still have work to do and reassure your flock that you will be back with more tools (lost weight = energy = better health = more you can do) to serve them and the lord. I am generally not a very religious person but am rediscovering my faith and what a powerful message this would be and might help to stop the behind the back talk (and in your face talk also).  Once they look at it this way maybe this 'support group' can focus on what they can do for you and the church to help out. If they can't come around be frank with them that you appreciate their opinion and concern but you don't want it discussed further and to focus on the issues at hand. God Bless, Shane

Shane, I will turn it into teaching moments as much as possible.    I'm a very forgiving person of course, and today am doing much better with the 'non' support.  I will certainly be aware that they believe the hype more than what the surgery actually is and will challenge them to come along the journey with me.

 

Many blessings for you,

Pastor Bob

I'll keep you in my prayers, man. Remember who's hands this is all in...not some committee, but a diety. hey...that rhymed :) God bless and comfort you. It'll happen in His time. --Jake

I appreciate it dude!  It has never been any doubt whose hands this surgery is in.  If it was left up to me - I'd be afraid to death - but that's been taken care of too. Peace, Bob.

Hi Jim, You know, before I had RNY I struggled with the spiritual aspect of this surgery.  I had been through several Faith-based weight loss programs and always gained the weight back.  I struggled with the guilt of "I must not be spritual enough or have enough faith."  The RNY was a last result thing for me, sounds like the same for you.  I struggled through this for 2 years, then God hit me in the face with the fact that this gluttony is sin....no lighter or worse than adultery or anything else.  It's sin, and my stomach and attitudes were causing me to sin.  I wa**** with several teachings and devotionals at once.  Erwin Lutzer from Moody Church, then the following from my morning devotional.

 

 

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The Strictest Discipline – June 29th

 

 

“If your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and cast if from you; for it is more profitable for you that one of your members perish, than for your whole body to be cast into hell” (Matthew 5:30).

 

Jesus did not say that everyone must cut off his right hand, but that “if your right hand causes you to sin” in your walk with him, then it is better to “cut it off.” There are many things that are perfectly legitimate, but if you are going to concentrate on God you cannot do them. You right hand is one of the best things you have, but Jesus says that if it hinders you in following His precepts, then “cut it off”. The principle taught here is the strictest discipline or lesson that ever hit humankind.

 

 

When God changes you through regeneration, giving you new life through spiritual rebirth, your life initially has the characteristic of being maimed. There are a hundred and one things that you dare not do – things that would be sin for you, and would be recognized as sin by those *****ally know you. But the unspiritual people around you will say, “What’s so wrong with doing that? How absurd you are!” There has never been a saint who has not lived maimed life initially. Yet it is better to enter into life maimed but lovely in God’s sight than to appear lovely to man’s eyes but lame to God’s. At first, Jesus Christ through His Spirit has restrained you from doing a great many things that may be perfectly right for everyone else but not right for you. Yet, see that you don’t use your restrictions to criticize someone else.

 

 

The Christian life is a maimed life initially, but in verse 48 Jesus gave us the picture of a perfectly well – rounded life – “You shall be perfect, just as your Father in heaven is perfect.”

 

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At that point my decision was made.  I had a peace about it.  I did not share it with the people at church for awhile for the fear that I would get the same reaction that you did.  But a funny thing happened, when I shared it with the elders that really cared about what was best for me and my family, they were incredibly supportive and still are incredibly supportive.  I am now a little less than 4 months removed and have lost 87lbs.  I'm off 4 of the 5 medications I was on prior to surgery.  I was diabetic before surgery for 10 years....completely off the diabetes meds in 5 weeks after surgery.  I have a ton more energy and energy to be with my kids and family.

 

 

Don't get discouraged, the people on your committee are speaking from ignorance, not knowledge.  They only know what they have learned from Oprah and others.  Certainly this surgery is a tool, but you are following God's plan and the words of Jesus.  Let them argue with that.  Your stomach and attitudes are causing you to sin.  Period.  This is the only sin that is not only not talked about in the church, it is actually encouraged through pot luck suppers and pastor visitations.  No one serves just salad when the pastor comes for dinner.  It's an incredibly stressful job and one with very wierd hours due to visitations at homes and hospitals.  It is sort of being in the state of constant travel.

 

Paul said when it became clear to him that God had called him on the Damascus road, he did not confer with man.  This was a decision between me and God.  That sin had to be dealt with in my life.  So this is your opportunity to be a leader, not a follower.  But as pastor and a leader for Christ, you have to do what God has called you to do.  And if that is having this surgery, then don't let anyone talk you out of it.

 

 

Other than following Christ, and choosing my bride, this was the best decision I ever made.

A pastor friend once told me, "Remember - the devil wants you fat." because he can take away your energy and effectiveness.  I've found that the surgery has allowed me to be a greater witness and helped start two new ministries for me as a result.  It will do the same for you.

Blessings,

 

 

Greg

 

The Devil is going to have to be content to go to hell and stay there! Thanks again,  Best Regards, Bob.

Men, thank you so much for your support.  Nothing else but on this forum needs to happen.  I'm going to call CardsFan and Big Al who are close to me (60 miles).  Thanks again.  Bob.

Hi Bob, Well...that seems a little disturbing.   I am really sorry they took the stance they did. Unfortunately, to someone that has not had to deal with weight issues, we are generally looked down on as being weak or undisicplined.   I found that as I began to tell people that I was having the surgery, I got the motorcycle treatment.   I am not sure if you have ever owned a motorcycle, but there is an interesting phenomenon when you do.   As soon as you tell someone that you own a bike, they will tell you all the people they know that have been hurt or killed on a motorcycle.   The same thing seems to happen with this surgery.   You tell someone that you are having it and they tell you about everything they saw on TV that was negative. It looks like you have done your homework.   The decision is yours.  If you can't find support within you local group, look here.   There is plenty of support to go around.    One thing I have started doing is educating the people that throw out the negative stuff.   Tell them about the options, tell them about the surgery, tell them about nutrition and the fact that it is a tool.   Let them know that you have tried everything else and that this is a last resort.   Tell them that you need their help and support to make sure it is a success.   Involve them in your journey and they might turn out to be your biggest chreer leaders.   Best of luck dealing with this.   You have all of our support here.    Regards, Dave

Dave,  Thanks for the support!  You know what, it's been awhile since I've owned a bike but you are correct in saying that about owners.   Good luck in your surgery and I can't wait to see your progress! Bob.