Can someone Help my Friend?

Hello Guys, I am not lurking around in your forum. I'm hoping to find some help for a life long family friend. He is about 69 years old,  and weighs about 500lbs, prob. more. He is home bound, on oxygen 24/7 with many health problems. He lives in Bristol, TN, and his wife asked me to look into WLS for him. She cried to me and it broke my heart. She is so afraid of him becoming bed ridden or worse, die. I told her I would see if I could find a surgeon for him, but, really I am not sure If I can find one who would take Medicare and someone at his age. I really don't know what to do. I did find a Dr. Spaw in Knoxville and the Center of Exellence, Baptist Hospital, but I think he has an age limit.  I'm worried about how my friend would get to a place where a surgeon could actually do the surgery . How is someone his size and and lack mobility handled? He CAN make his way to the bath room with a walker. His feet are so swollen that you can barely see his toes. I just hate to give my dear friends false hope, but right now, they have no hope. Can someone help? Janet

Sounds like you're on the right track. Medicare will only approve a center of excellence, you found that. I would call them and ask them for advice, I am sure there is a way to get him there IF he is willing. He has to want to do it.  w/o his copperation your efforts are futile. Have him or his wife call the Dr, if he won't do it I am sure he can refer you to someone who can that is also a center of excellence. Good Luck, hopefully someone from Tenn will see this and can be of more help.

Thanks so much for your response, GoingMobile! He was very excited about seeing how slim I have become and he asked lots of questions about my WLS.  He was amazed and he didn't want to talk about much else, so yes, I think he may cooperate...as scary as this surgery is. But you know what? I am also afraid because, what if I do find a way for him to have the surgery and he does not make it thru? God, that would he a horror. As I sat at his home, seeing him so...well..he's always been a big man, but he keeps getting bigger and bigger every time I see him. He hasn't been outside his house in a few years! It's so sad. I'm pretty sure he would be willing to have WLS, but I really don't think it's a "REAL" vision for him at this time. You know..what seems too good to be true thing..He's feeling very fragle.  Afraid, since he's in bad health. I sent him a package to read about the surgery today. I also sent him some info from Dr. Spaw's website and printed off the forms for him.  I just hate to get his hopes up and then let him down.

Hey Janet...

I have not much to do or to say but I would like you to know that my prayers are in their way for you and your friend...

Best Regards

Alejandro from Guadalajara Mexico

Thank you for your prayers, Alejandro! God Bless you.

unfortunately Janet it sounds like two strikes already. age and weight. you know they have to think of the malpractice and the guidelines. i bet they would want him to diet for 6 months first and even then, he's high risk. i suppose he has a ton of comorbidities that make him an even higher risk and in this day and age of lawsuits this might be one most docs will pass on. please don't get mad at me and you know i'm probably stating the obvious for you. if he were near me i would ask my doc but there's no way he can travel to LA to see him in his current condition. as was mentioned, i think the age limit alone would make it a no go and add to that the problems and high weight. I'm sorry i even opened my mouth but i wanted to try to say something positive so if you don't get an answer you like email me again and i'll talk to my surgeon. maybe he can find someone for him through his network. i sure hope he gets it. sounds like a nice man. good luck and i praise you for being such a caring friend trying to help......Carbonblob

Dear Carbonblob, Sadly, I realize what you are saying. He is high risk, even without surgery, he is high risk. Guess I'm looking for some slim chance at life for him. Yes, he is a dear man, a very nice friend. He grew up with my father who is gone now. They were life long buds. My mom grew up with his wife. I just lost my mother and focusing on doing something to save one. Guess I'm just setting myself up for more heartache. All I can do is pray God will lead us.

well Janet, if it's any consolation, you're a good person and friend. knowing how hard this will be and coupled to your recent loss makes you all the more special. I can't speak for anyone else in here but I'll save you a seat in the locker room anytime you want to talk. thanks so much for coming by and don't forget my offer. I'll talk to my doc if you're not having any luck. take care and stay well. so sorry about mom.....Carbonblob

Janet, Thanks for dropping in looking for advice for your friend.  He is and will be in my prayers.  I had my surgery here in Indiana Nov 2005 and I was 62 at the time of surgery.  This was the oldest the Bariactic Center would do surgery.  I am not sure why they set these age maximums.  I was 450 on the day of sugery and I know that I would not be sitting here typing this message unless they have computers in Heaven. I wish I could pass on more positive information because your friend could surely benefit from this surgery.  I had LAP RNY and a thought just passed thru my head wondering if a surgeon would be more willing to do that type of surgery.  If it were me I would begin working with his PCP and the Bariatic Center from the appoint that he needs this done to save his life and give the man at least a few more years.  I have seen on TV where they have done the surgery on guys weighing a lot more than him, but they were 40 years or so younger. If I here or read anything that might help you, I will certainly drop you a line. Dan

I've heard that muscle loss is so great at that age, that it's not good to lose weight for any reason. Not sure if "for any reason", is set in stone. I read that people over 60 or perhaps 65 dieting are a "physician's nightmare", because the amount of muscle loss can be so great.

Dave