ANYONE who knows me...

...or feels strongly about this issue.... I am having a hard time with approval from my medical team because I am the youngest person EVER in the program (19 going on 40) and they want to be perfectly sure that I can handle the huge responsibility and comittment that surgery requires. Im looking for either personal references to write a short note or paragraph about me as an individual (and my amazing amount of maturity and understanding of WLS) or of people's personal opinions about age and WLS, if they agree that it doesnt matter how old you are, it matters where you are mentally in your life. Any help would be amazing because I plan on submitting these responses to my medical team on November 22nd. I am re-posting this to other boards so if you see this again, sorry! haha Thanks guys. Feel free to email me if you need any other information. I really really appreciate your help and support in my fight! -Angela

hi Angela, I wonder why they had you go through the process if they weren't going to approve you. Did you have a psych eval? I dont think WLS is something that should be determined by age, but I do think its something someone should be 100% ready for. Its not a surgery that can be easily overturned. A year down the road when you eat too fast and get sick or want to get dessert at a restaurant and can't because there's nothing on the menu without sugar or even those nights when your friends want to go out drinking and you can't because the alcohol goes so quickly into your blood stream that it can lead to liver damage much faster than a person who hadn't had surgery.. They want to make sure you're making the right decision so that you don't have regrets or don't start drinking and develop liver issues. I know people who have had surgery and follow every rule by the book, I also know people who had the surgery who go for a drink after work every night and think its ok, ate a couple wendy's chicken nuggets during the "pureed" stage and thought it was ok because she chewed and chewed them before swallowing, someone who still goes to chinese buffets, drinks water with meals, soda less than a month after surgery because the person "missed" drinking it... I can go on and on with real examples that i've heard from post-ops... Of course these people said they were ready for surgery, passed the psych eval with flying colors but after surgery the "head hunger" was stronger than their "will power".. At our last support group meeting there was a woman there who wanted to "rush" her surgery because her son was getting married.. The more she spoke, the more it sounded like she was looking for a quick weight loss method for her son's wedding pictures! I'm listening to her and thinking to myself, thats not the reason to rush a life changing decision!! Trust me when I tell you its not easy being post-op. This lady at work who wants to have surgery thinks.. "oh, whoa is me" when i start telling her I'm losing slow because I wasn't getting in over 600 calories and over 65 grams of protein a day for the first 5 months after surgery... Each day its a job in itself to get enough calories and protein in. I dont track on fitday.com to see what I'm eating for the day, I track to make sure I have enough calories in and enough protein in so that FINALLY my hair will stop falling out in CLUMPS (yes 7 1/2 months later I'm still losing tons of hair and thats after taking 2000mcg of biotin a day and using nioxin shampoo, conditioner and folicle booster)!! Vitamins have to be taken daily. Because we can't absorb like normal people its easy to malnurish. I remember watching a show on TV about a woman who didn't take vitamins after surgery and went legally blind! They're an essential part of life, something that you have to take for the rest of your life. I'm sure they have reasons more than your age as to why they haven't approved your surgery. If age was the only reason why would the program be open to people under 20? I hope you don't read this and think I'm downing you for wanting surgery at your age. If you're ready and responsible enough for it, I wish you the best! Just weigh the pros and cons before hand so you have no regrets I can tell you I'm 34 and haven't regretted surgery a day since I had it done. Could I have said that when I was in my 20's when I was out having fun with friends, enjoying full of sugar margaritas, shots of tequila, endless plates of nachos and sweet heavenly desserts? Deffinately not.. Good luck with the process, I hope it goes well! keep us posted

Thats my whole point in all of this- proving that I am not the average 19 year old girl and Im very mature for my age. I dont party, I dont go out and drink nor do I have the desire to- I have ample oppurtunity to but thats not what is important to me. I may be fat but I dont base my social interactions around food and drinking. Whats important to me is my family, my relationship, and school- graduating college and starting my own practice. Most importantly being healthy. I dont drink or smoke (never have) nor do I drink coffee or soda, whatsoever. I've eliminated salt, caffiene, and refined sugar from my diet already and I take 4 vitamins daily. Im really trying to commit NOW to make post-op that much easier. I have undergone a psych eval and have been working with mental health professionals and behavioral medicine for two years. It is JUST my age that they are using. My nutritionist has said that she thinks I "get it" and that I dont just go in there and "yes" her and that I know more about post op nutrition then she sometimes does. The behavioral specialist also has cleared me because she thinks Im "wise beyond my years" and admires how much I am able to help people old enough to be my grandmothers and make them understand things that they just aren't getting about themselves. My PCP who I have known for most of my life is my biggest cheerleader. I also go to support group meetins three times a month and I can't believe some of these people - say either pre-op wanting to rush surgery- or they dont know a thing about surgery asking "what is the Rou limb made out of" because its not something thats in or body already? clearly misinformed..or post-ops who can't even tell me the name of the surgery that was preformed on them. I feel like I could preform the surgery on myself. I know what kind of commitment WLS requires, I dont take it lightly...my aunt had surgery and now is heavier then when she started and is suspected of having a drug problem, its not a game. The program is just covering their asses because Im the youngest one ever to go through the program (which is fairly new) and the medical directors WHO HAVE NEVER MET ME...are worried for their program. Some of the doctors that work for them dont even believe in WLS and keep telling me that I can lose it on my own. Yea being 200+lbs overweight and I can lose it on my own? Not happening or I would have done that by now. This program is notorious for giving people the run around and playing games- if I didn't have such an emotional attatchment to my nutritionist, psychologist, and group members I would go elsewhere. I've spoken to another program who has seen my medical records and is willing to take me as a patient but I want to fight the system. Whats easy is never worthwhile and whats worthwhile is never easy. I want to make it through this program and be a huge success longterm so that they can see that age does not matter- what does matter is the person- so that later on down the road another person my age that also has no other options can go through this program and not be given such a hard time. Im out to inspire others to fight like hell to save their own lives and maybe make the path a little easier for others who are coming after them. Thats my goal. And I have weighed the pro's and con's, I have for 5 years now and the benefits definitely outweight the risks. But there are still small minded people out there and doctors who have god complex's. And I dont think anyone is more mentally stable then me or more capable of success just because they have lived longer than me. Its quality, not quantity. Maybe I was stupid for posting this but oh well, I've drafted my own letter- so has my PCP- and so has my best friend. We'll find out at the end of the month if I "measure up," according to the medical directors. I'll definitely keep everyone posted. Im just so angry and fed up but I hope that it helps propel me forward in this journey.

You do seem determined and since you don't have plans to change programs, good luck battling their decision! Maybe you can ask to speak to the board who discusses surgery candidates? If they see how determined and knowledged you are about the surgery it might change thier mind. good luck.

Thanks! I scheduled a meeting with one of them next week and I've drafter a letter to the ones that are unavailable to meet with. Maybe they'll just get sick of me and approve me to stop my nagging.

Good luck in your endeavors.... But, if all else fails and they STILL say 'hell no, absolutely not, we're NOT operating on you", then cut your losses, get ALL your records together, and go see another program. After they do your surgery and in a few years you've lost all your 200 pounds and are KEEPING it off, then go back and visit your original team, and SHOW them that age doesn't matter. Bottom line, if they weren't comfortable in having someone SO young in the program, then they shouldn't have accepted you into it. You've jumped through their hoops (necessary hoops, but still a long arduous process that's quite time consuming), and you should be entitled to your surgery. Anyways, good luck again and I hope you get your date soon!!