How to talk to your Husband about lap band?

I am one of the ppl that have had problems  . I am not saying it does not work for some ppl it just hasn't for me . I lost weight on it the first year struggled the second year and by the third year gave up and gained all but 7 lbs of my weight back  . I have had a lot of fills and unfills . I either get to much restriction or not enough . I think there are a lot of hate for the band because there is a lot of physical pain from the side affects of it... for some ppl . If you have never had it then you can't relate to it . The side affects are very very painful and it gets frustrating when you don't lose weight , can't find the right fill and can't tolerate a lot of foods . ~ Cindy

Read the Revisions forum, seriously. The band IS that bad. It's worse than I could have ever imagined, actually. I was of the mindset that if it didn't work, just have it removed and go on my merry way. Well, after your nerves are damaged by the band's presence (and it's situated VERY close to where the Vagus nerves run) there's no going back. It's not reversible.

Around the two or three year mark most bodies rebel furiously to the band's presence... and then it's all downhill from there.

Google-- referred left shoulder pain + lap band. It's a very common side effect. It's from the Vagus nerves being irritated. And it can be debilitating.

We've had bands... and that's why most of us are filled with hatred for the band. It's hard to NOT hate something that has caused such pain and suffering. At least that's my reason.

Vickie,

I've lost 100 lbs and if I could go back in time and choose to not go forward with getting a lap band...I WOULD.

I live in chronic pain, and I will live the rest of my life in chronic pain because of the lap band. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE reconsider.

Join my group and read about our experiences, or at least read about Bexie's experience below. This is from a pro band bandster.

Vickie, you MUST make sure you have extra money in a savings account if you're going to be a self pay FOR ANY WLS.

Post Date 12/2/11 6:09 pm
Topic: RE: Your Post-op experience

Thanks you guys. Stragely enough, even though I have suffered from debilitating panic attacks for the last 5 years, I have no panic about this (yet?). I am not an extremely religios person, but I have kind of decided that this is not in my hands. If I go in and come out with no complications, that is what God wants. If I die on the table, that is what God wants. I have no control over that.

Post Date 12/2/11 6:13 pm
Topic: RE: Newbie, soon to be banded

Well, since my surgery is Monday, I have been fighting my insurance to get this done for over a year, my husband has been successfully banded for 3 years and has lost 200lbs, and I have researched the potential complications and risks, I don't see the need to fill my head with horror stories right before my surgery.  I do thank you for your concern, but I am pretty set on this course of action.

Post Date 12/4/11 10:35 am
Topic: RE: Re-post: Report complications/failures directly to the FDA!!!
 

All the procedures have complications, all have failures, all have risk.  Anyone who goes in to any WLS without understanding that is a fool.

Post Date 12/4/11 4:16 pm
Topic: RE: Re-post: Report complications/failures directly to the FDA!!!

Can you point me to the actual scientific study where they say that the Lap Band is the most likely to have complications?  I mean, real data, not just a poll of people who came online to complain about their bad outcomes because they are pissed that it didn't work for them?  Do you know why there are so few people on here with Lap Band success stories?  It's because the ones who are successful, with no complications,  are out there living their life, not at home infront of a computer, whining about how bad their lap band sucks.

And, if I end up needing my band out, and my insurance won't pay, I guess I will just have to beg and borrow, and work my ass off until I have the cash to get it done. 

If I were a weaker person, your posts would have made me scared and made me question my decision.  I worry for some of the newbies that end up here, pre surgery or post-op.  Just the ranting way you post could cause them anxieties and stress that no one needs at such a trying time.  Rather than blasting everyone elses experiences, and how Lap Band is never good, at least stick to your own experiences and stop talking for the rest of the Lap Banded community.

I'm sorry, but your approach just seems a lot like someone standing in front of my car screaming, "DON'T GET IN THE CAR!!!  YOUR GONNA DIE!!! PEOPLE DIE EVERY DAY IN CARS!!!!!"

Post Date 12/6/11 7:58 am
Topic: So it's done

Everything went fine during the surgery.  I woke up thinking I had had a baby and they took her away.  the nurse argued with me and said I had not had a baby, but I wan't taking no for an answer.  I asked her where my mom was and the nurse told me she was probably in the waiting room, and I told her "Nuh uh, she's dead" 

I am still in some pain, and I am burping up foam.  Doc told me to try warm water instead of cold.  It is less uncomfortable than the cold.  One more day (maybe 2) and I hope I am back to my old self.

Post Date 12/6/11 6:28 pm
Topic: RE: So it's done

I am not sure why, probably my stomach is irritated.  I have been on the phone with the PA twice today, and he has told me to try this and try that.  None of it is working.  I take a sip of water, feel pressure, and woo**** all comes out.  I asked if they installed a dishwasher while they were in there, or something.  He said No, but I am still wondering.  Gonna check my temp in a few and see if I am feverish.

Post Date 12/7/11 8:41 am
Topic: RE: So it's done

Yep, i did.  Spent all morning in the ER, got 3 liters of iv fluids.  The surgeon came in and ended up sucking 1cc out of the band (left in there from their test to make sure it was a fully functional band).  Sucking out that 1 cc and some air has made a difference.  He also said my stomach may just be slow waking up.  I know my intestines were quiet as can be until this morning when they burbled a bit.  I am off fluids today (doc said the 3liters IV were fine, and to let my stomach rest).

Post Date 12/7/11 8:45 am
Topic: RE: So it's done

I am feeling better now that I went to the ER.  Doc pulled 1cc of fluid and some air out of the band that wasn't really supposed to be there.  I am on stomach rest for now.  I start fluids again tomorrow.

Post Date 12/7/11 3:28 pm
Topic: RE: So it's done

Yeah, I am not even considering a fill until I am past 8 weeks.  I figure I am going to call today day 1 and just start over again.  I think my innards were just still asleep, but they have woken up today.

Post Date 12/8/11 3:24 pm
Topic: Houston, we have a problem.

Well, I am 4 days post band, and I have yet to keep down any fluids.  Been to the ER to get IV fluids and I felt better.  Stayed on 1 day of total stomach rest, still can't hold anything down.  Going in tomorrow and they are going to scope me and see what is going on.  The doctor said if we can't get this under control, I will be disbanded.  Trying to keep my spirits up, but I just want a stinking drink of water.

Post Date 12/8/11 8:31 pm
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.

He said he did an xray while I was still out and everything looked fine, but I really thought I should have done a swallow something xray.  Hubby did when he had his. 

I do have serious anxiety attacks.  Oddly enough, I am not feeling a lot of anxiety over this.  I mean, nothing like the out of control, baseless, obsessive anxiety I have when I am having a "bad day".  I am upset, I was hoping to have it eazy like my hub did, but I forgot, I have my luck, and that just about screws me in every adventure.

Post Date 12/8/11 8:33 pm
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.

Oh yeah, and even though I am not taking anything in, now I am spitting/burping up some foul dark brown stuff. It is bitter and gross. and all i can do is swish and spit until he checks me tomorrow.

Post Date 12/9/11 5:08 am
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.

Yep, had the surgery at 2:30-3 and was home by 6:30.

Post Date 12/9/11 5:15 am
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.

If it was bright red, I would have been off to the ER faster that Santa Clause.  The strangest thing is, when I lay down, I can feel my band working.  I can feel saliva that I swallow slip through the band (it makes the oddest noises). 



Post Date 12/9/11 1:00 pm
Topic: RE: Any update Bexie?

I am home. I have an NG tube to hydrate me if needed. The band is open, there is plenty of room for fluid to flow through. Not sure why I am having issues. He said that sometimes people are just incompatible with the band. I go back in Tuesday to see if this is any better.

Post Date 12/9/11 1:11 pm
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.
 

Well, I am back home.  I have an NG tube to hydrate if needed.  Doc said the band is wide open and there is plenty of room for stuff to flow through.  He has no clue why I am having trouble.  We meet again tuesday to discuss the next step.

Post Date 12/9/11 2:10 pm
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.

I don't think they did, and I am not having nausea or stomach cramps.  I have pressure, like a burp needs to come out, then I try to let the burp fly and everything comes with it, sometimes just liquid sometimes foam.  My husband seems to think it has something to do with my backassward burps.  I don't burp out like most people (you know, trucker burps).  When I burp, they almost seem to go in, not out.  I have always burped like that.  I can force myself to burp the "traditional" way, but I have to swallow a lot of air which is a no-no.  I am doing my best not to even burp, but the pain gets to be after a few and I have to relieve the pressure somehow.   I don't know what to do.  Can I just sleep for the next 4 days?

Post Date 12/9/11 3:30 pm
Topic: RE: Houston, we have a problem.

I got the Michael Jackson Drug and Reglan to prevent post-op nausea.

Post Date 12/10/11 6:06 am
Topic: RE: Any update Bexie?

So, I layed down in bed last night, and I noticed when I layed down and swallowed my own spit, I felt and heard it move past the band. Then a lightbulb went off in my head, that was the exact position I was in when they scoped me. So this morn, I got a bottle of warm water, a straw, cut to fit the bottle, layed down in bed, and took a little sip. Squeeek, it went through, took another sip, squeek, it went through. Laid there a few minutes, a burp came up clean, sat up, felt a little pressure, then it passed, fluid stayed down. What the heck? Am I only open when I lay on my side? Is the gas able to slip out one side of the opening as the fluid eases in the other? I don't know what to do. I can't lay down and eat and drink in bed the rest of my life.

Post Date 12/10/11 6:49 am
Topic: RE: Any update Bexie?

It is really strange, I have managed a couple of sips now sitting up.  I have no clue what is wrong with me.

Post Date 12/10/11 9:55 am
Topic: RE: My tummy is growling but I don't feel hungry, Is this normal?

I was banded 2 days before you, and yeah, the sort of squeely feeling is air and fluid swapping places through the band.  I could hear mine, but hubby couldn't until he listened to my back.  I am actually sitting here watching a cooking show for the first time in almost 3 weeks.  I was on a post op liquid diet, and even flipping by a food commercial pissed me off because I was hungry.  Right now, it isn't bothering me at all.  Food is not anywhere near appealing.  I am doing good with water and juice.

Post Date 12/10/11 10:03 am
Topic: RE: Any update Bexie?

I have kept down about 15 oz of water in the past 5 hours!

Post Date 12/10/11 2:09 pm
Topic: RE: Any update Bexie?

The only way i am using the tube is if I can't take anything orally.  So far, so good today.  The horrible foaming is gone, the pressure is so much less.  I still have a little ache as it passes through the band, but I am getting used to it.  I have 20 oz of water, and am working on a half and half glass of apple juice and water.

Post Date 12/10/11 7:40 pm
Topic: RE: Any update Bexie?

Had a little setback around 5pm. Was on the phone with a friend and started to feel really strange. Had a little foamy burp, so I stopped drinking. Checked my temp and I was 97.8 (low for me). Went in to the bathroom and my cheeks were bright red. I decided to lay down a bit and when I did, I had a little heartburn (probably the apple juice) but after a couple hours I felt better. However, after I got up, I took a sip and did have a foamy burp again. Still trying though.

Post Date 12/11/11 5:46 am
Topic: Not So Good today

Not feeling well today.  I am in pain, my whole midsection feels like I have been punched.  It's hard to take a deep breath, and the NG tube is irritating everything and making me feel gaggy.  took a sip and the pain was horrible.  This really sucks.

Post Date 12/11/11 6:49 am
Topic: RE: Not So Good today

I don't see the do****il Tuesday. I will get up and walk around a little, that might help. I just feel so yuck.

Post Date 12/11/11 8:37 am
Topic: RE: Not So Good today

still burping up foam a bit too. I just don't get it.

Post Date 12/11/11 10:05 am
Topic: RE: Not So Good today

He said he has no clue why I am doing that. It doesn't seem acid when it comes up, just a very firm foam, sometimes white, sometimes flecked with brown. I have not been drinking anything brown.

Post Date 12/11/11 10:27 am
Topic: RE: Not So Good today

I just never expected it to feel like this. In another day or so, I am supposed to be thinking about adding soft and mushies, and I have not yet even made it past fluids. I am not hungry, just constantly thirsty. I hope this all resolves in the next day because my surgeon said that we may have to pull the band.
 

Post Date 12/11/11 1:06 pm
Topic: RE: Not So Good today

I think it is this stupid NG tube rubbing me raw. My tonsil is bleeding from it. It keeps making me gag. I hate it.

Post Date 12/11/11 2:50 pm
Topic: RE: Not So Good today

I have it until Tuesday.  I wi**** would fall out in the night.  I was out like a light when they put mine in.

Post Date 12/13/11 10:33 am
Topic: Visit With My Surgeon

Still have a hose in my nose.  He wants me to exclusively hydrate through that (48 oz a day up my nose) and to take 1 protein shake down the snout too.  He has me crushing Reglan 4 times a day, and another anti-nausea pill.  He thinks if I can avoid inflamation over the next couple days it might straighten out.  If not, he will call Thursday to schedule a band removal for Friday.

Post Date 12/13/11 2:33 pm
Topic: RE: Visit With My Surgeon

Turns out Reglan knocks me out. I took it and an hour later I was out lke a light. Slept just long enough so that it was time for my next dose. I will have to try to put the protein shake down tomorrow. I still have 40oz of water to go in the next 30 mins (not gonna happen).

Post Date 12/14/11 6:36 am
Topic: RE: Visit With My Surgeon

The thing is, I am just not sure what we are going to learn by doing this "everything up the nose" BS.  I need to be able to drink, swallow, and keep it down.  I need to go back to work Monday.  I need to pay my Mortgage and buy a few more Christmas presents. 

I mean, if I am not taking anything orally, how am I going to know if I am better or not?

The Surgeon keeps saying he knows "I" can do this, but I am doing everything I physically can, and my body is still not behaving in a normal way.  It almost feels like a subtle way to blame me, you know, if it doesn't work it must be because "I" can't do this. 

Post Date 12/14/11 9:21 am
Topic: Another thing that ****** me off a little

At my appointment Tuesday the 13th, I weighed in at 20 lbs less than my presurgery appointment November 29th.  The doctor said my weight loss was good.  Hello, my weight loss is based on starvation and dehydration.  I am living on water and an occasional bit of juice.  I am an enforced anorexic and he thinks my weight loss is good?  I said replied to that, "Who knew, all you had to do is not eat".

Post Date 12/14/11 10:06 am
Topic: RE: Another thing that ****** me off a little

I am 90% right now thinking I am going to just have it out. This worrying is not worth it.

Post Date 12/14/11 11:07 am
Topic: RE: Another thing that ****** me off a little

I am still pro-band.  I think the band can work for some people (my husband for one), unfortunately, my body doesn't work with the band.

Post Date 12/14/11 5:07 pm
Topic: RE: Another thing that ****** me off a little

I can still be pro band because I have seen it work, and work well for people.  My husband is half the guy he used to be.  I honestly dont think he would be alive today without it.  His boss is finally at goal weight, and super happy.  He has had almost no problems.  His wife, however, has constant problems. 

What is going on with me is not the fault of the band, the surgeon, or even me.  It is my body's intolerance to a foreign object.

I wish you hadn't deactivated, we need people like you here, people who are passionate about saving other people from suffering at the hands of their surgeons and the lap band, people who still care and want to PAY IT FORWARD.

Come Back PLEASE.

Lisa