An open letter to OH, MODS, ERIC KLEIN, and YOU

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Dear Bette, OH and Eric Klein,

I concur with Bettes post.  I have been a member here for 2 years and am an OH Support Group Leader.  I am a comitted member of this forum and do eveything in my power to be a positve resource to newbies and experienced bandsters alike.  I have made many lasting friendships here and those relationships have greatly supported and enhanced my experience with my Lap Band and personal battle against obesity.

Like Bette, I feel I have brought a lot of members to OH through my Surgeon's practice as well as my personal advocacy for WLS.  Lately, I've had to add a caviot to my recommendation to use OH to warn people that "while there is a lot of negative posting, band bashing, outright fighting and name calling, it's still a good resource to get additional support and learn about living the banded life." One must carefully pick through the posts to find the positive feedback and encouragement that I found when I first joined this forum in 2009.  Should OH users need to walk through a land mine of trash talk and outright meaness to gain support?  I have 4 people in my live support group, (most who I met through OH), that no longer come to this site because of the negativity and attacks on our surgery type from other forums.  That's 25% of my group!  I had to start a FB version of my group because so many of my group don't use OH anymore because of the fighting, band bashing and general negativity.

I am and always will be a committed member of this site but it's hard to come here everyday only to focus on posting responses in defense of the WL tool that works so beautifully for me!  I rarely get to post any more about what a newbie can eat, what worked for me, NSV's or to give give support and encouragement to someone's who's frustrated, etc.  I used to post acronym lists, the plateau buster diet and refer people to my blog for food lists, on a daily basis and the focus has shifted so much on this forum that I rarely get to share what helped me lose 115 lbs. 

I've reported, negative and abusive posts to OH with no response in the past.  There doesn't seem to be any defense against those that insist on delivering their message in a mean, confrontational, manner.  Don't get me wrong, people have a right to their opinions, but there has to be accountability to maintain some standard of civil behavior if we want to maintain a constructive, educational forum for support.

Blocking someone and then trashing them seems to be a recent issue and it's a dirty, unfair game to play.  If you have personal issues with someone you should P.M. them and give them an opportunity to defend themselves.  Bette isn't the only one experiencing this and right now.

Do you really want to lose positive forces on this site like Bette, Jean M., Kate P. because of a hadful of band bashers?  Also, why was a band failure site allowed to be created?  There's no specific RNY failure or Sleeve failure forum and those surgeries fail too!  I'm surprised that Allegran isn't all over this being that they are a major supporter of this site.

It's time to do something.  Will you respond, please?

Lisa O.

yes, the lap-band failure forum bugs me too.  Why is there a need for a singling out of the band when there's already a failed WLS forum??  Doesn't make sense to me.

Do you really want to lose positive forces on this site like Bette, Jean M., Kate P. because of a hadful of band bashers?  Also, why was a band failure site allowed to be created?  There's no specific RNY failure or Sleeve failure forum and those surgeries fail too!  I'm surprised that Allegran isn't all over this being that they are a major supporter of this site.

I want to address your comments about the band failure site.

The failed band site was created because people who have problems with Allegran's product need a place to vent where they don't have to expose you happy bandsters to negative, but true information that you don't want to know about.

Obesity Help is supposed to be here for the support of WLS pts first and formost.  Even if their main objective is profit, they couldn't attract people to this site to make a profit if the main focus was not on a place for WLS pts to share all types of experiences with WLS.

People are going to continue to speak out about their negative experience with the band whether it is on the lap band board, the failed band board, the revision board, the main board or any board they visit for the support of the problems they are having.

What you are advocating is a voice for yourself, but for others to keep their mouths shut.  Ain't gonna happen.

Thanks for setting me straight, Phyllis. I actually fully support the failed WLS site.

Lisa O.

I, personally, would love to hear what Allergan has to say about their sub par product.

The Failed Band Group was "allowed"  because anyone can create a group... if someone wanted to create a group titled, "My Band is the Greatest Thing Ever Created," it would be totally acceptable, too.

Maybe those of you have haven't had failed bands can't quite understand the singular effects that a failed band causes.  There are so few places that we are "allowed" to discuss our horrible, life changing experiences without being told how "negative" we are. And there are more people joining every day, so there is a need for a Failed Band Group.

Also, why was a band failure site allowed to be created?

maybe for the same reason a band grad board group was able to be formed??
at least the failed group is OPEN to all - the band grad forum requires you to prove who you are / surgeon / etc.  
why do "I" have to provide personal information to be considered a "grad" to that group?    their rules - it''s also private & most vets post there (see katep's thread this wk) - to me that is far more of a disservice to those new / old / or somewhere in between in their lapband journey.

as far as the topic - OH will do nothing, because they don't have to.   private groups here & on FB will get set up.....but at the end of the day, a new batch will come in to fill the void.    

rinse & repeat

Hi Lisa,
I want to share with you and others on here that I am a member of the failed band group, but my band hasn't failed me at all.  My reasons for joining the group were many, but primarily to continue to hear what to look out for in case I develop a problem, hear what some of the members feel might have contributed to their bands failing and to keep in touch with some who no longer post on this board.  I have been treated respectfully by all there and the atmosphere is positive even though some of the posters have had really terrible issues with their bands.  I am not afraid of being "cubby-holed" because of joining this group and hope that what I learn and gain from my friends over there can be shared here when members are struggling.
Thanks for being a great asset to this forum... Steph

I am with you 1000% on this. I also joined the Failed Lap band group for exactly the same reason. Never say never...On the other hand, the notion that all Lapbanders will fail is also not my opinion. That's like saying all Alcoholics will relapse..Ther are no absolutes.

In the famous words of Forrest Gump
Stupid is as stupid does



Everything on the internet should be taken with a grain of salt, and getting wrapped up about what stupid (IMO) people say on here or on TV or where ever is ridonculus..

I haven't joined, but I've lurked on the failed band group. I agree, education is vital to success.  I can learn from those who've had problems as well as learn from those who've been successful.

I'm not a "cheerleader for the band" although I've been accused of being one before.  I'm very aware that things can go wrong with the band.. things can go wrong with any WLS.   I have no issues with people discussing band problems, in a calm & rationale manner.. it's the over emotional, name calling, vituperative posts that I think are ill mannered and inappropriate.

I just find it strange that folks feel a need for a separate forum when there's already the failed WLS group.  The name does bother me, but I guess I'll get over it.