New to the site. Looking for support not criticism

I think that this is a wonderful site. It is like everything you need for successful weight loss combined into one. I have read information, researched weight loss, tried dieting, different types of weight loss medication, and so far nothing has been of help. Then I find this site where you can track everything here, and I think it is very helpful.

I am new to this site. I have not had the chance to speak with very many people. I have posted a few messages on the forums, and it seems that some people just want to criticize me. Rather than support my decision. I have yet to have weight loss surgery (as I've said before) Don't want people to think I'm repeating myself on purpose  I find that in my life I don't have a lot of people who I can look to for advice, support, and feel comfortable talking to. I just felt that this website would be a great opportunity for me to have the chance to do that. I think that support is a big factor in whether you succeed at something or not.

However, since joining this site I have had people saying really mean things to me on here. Telling me that I must not care too much about my body or else I wouldn't be getting such a horrible surgery. And many other hurtful things. I understand that some people are not for one surgery or the other. However, I feel there are different surgeries out there to meet the needs of different people. I don't understand why people would be so angry about a procedure. They should instead support me on wanting to lose weight. So I just thought I would post a new message on the message board in the hopes of finding SUPPORTIVE and NICE people to speak to.

Am....I'm so sorry people weren't nice to you on here.  I just had my band surgery 3/23 and I love it.  Its a completely personal decision and those people who were being mean to you for choosing the surgery you want, maybe they are insecure about the surgery they chose.  Some of my family and friends thought I should get the bypass, but every time I thought of doing that surgery I got a knot at the pit of my gut, but when I thought of the lap band, I felt "relieved".  Weird I know, but I needed to trust my gut.  Its a slower weight loss, but I'm completely happy with the decision I made.  Lap band isn't for everyone and of course there are complications, but EVERY surgery has complications. 


I hope you find some supportive and helpful people on here..Hell I will be there for you!  Everytime I have posted on here I got nothing but support and care. 

Good luck to you and welcome to your new journey!!!

Thank you for your reply. I appreciate it. I am thankful that there are so many different types of surgeries out there. Because I'm sure that there are many contributing factors in why people get the certain surgery that they do. The surgery that seems perfect to me may not even be an option for somebody else. That's why I didn't understand how people could be so harsh about my decision. They made their decision and they should allow me to make mine. I appreciate any helpful information, advice, experiences, or anything like that they may have. I love talking to people, hearing their story, about their weight loss journey, and things like that. But at the same time I'm going to ultimately make my decision on what I feel is right for me. I think prior to anyone getting a surgery they look into all the options, all the pros, all the cons, and all the personal things that would influence each surgery. I have medical problems that would be worsened by the lack of vitamins/nutrients. That played a big part in what type of surgery I should get. I take comfort in knowing that the lap-band is reversible if need be. That was a big comfort for me. I realize that the weight loss may be slower than other surgeries, but I'm ok with that. Because I know that motivation, commitment, exercise, proper diet, and attitude play a large role in effective weight loss for any type of surgery. As long as I'm doing what I should I'm ok with a lower weight loss. The fact that I'm taking steps towards a healthier me is what is important for me.

Are you going to answer me ?

Hi there! I'm sorry you are feeling this way, sweetie! Yes, there are certainly some naysayers and also some that have had their own bad experiences and rightfully want to share it to discourage others. Although I agree with you, it does often come off as criticism and they are sometimes tactless in expressing themselves.

Please know that *I* will not judge you or try to discourage you EVER. If you want to discuss your issues privately, please feel free at any time to send me a personal message if you are more comfortable with that and I will do my best to offer support, advice and guidance.

I am on here every day and will respond regardless. Not every one will support your decision as to what surgery you chose, but use the "block" button as needed if you are offended by certain posts and it will make for a much more pleasurable experience here on the forums. Stay positive and please keep coming back. We all need positivity and support for the same reason & goal...weight loss (and for me, maintenance.) Stand by your decision and what *YOU* believe is right for *YOU*. That is what I do and at the end of the day, I leave with my integrity and if people don't like my happy, positive self...who cares?

 Im sorry you've felt this, that can be so isolating. I mirror what the others have said, and I use the "Take what you need and leave the rest" attitude. HUGS!

 Your best bets are to:

1. Block the people who annoy you. You'll just feel better.
2. Read lots of posts so you can discover which subjects will attract the negativity you are trying to avoid.
3. Let so stuff just roll off your back.

That will be a start to a newer, less-angsty OH experience.

Yeah I know I shouldn't let people get to me. I think that is one of my biggest downfalls. That is why I was so happy to find this site & people to talk to. I am so shy that I don't have a lot of people I can speak to in person about my weight loss. I guess that what the people said just got to me. I am glad that not everyone on this site is like that though.

 There have been some people on here that if they had said in real life what they said on here, I would have punched them in the face. Here, they just get blocked. 

Ha! My bet is, in real life, those Keyboard Warriors wouldn't DARE speak to you that way!