I have the mystery solved

Well I had been dreading telling my boss that I needed off to go to a consult for the lapband.  I am the office manager in a small office and have been for 10 years so, yes, I needed to tell him why I would be off.  We are good friens so I don't have a problem with him knowing but......
He kinda shook his head, and I told him that I didn't want his opinion.  He said ok but then said well have you tried losing it on your own with diet and exercise.  Well yes for about 20 years. He said no I mean really try and stick to it, all you have to do is burn more calories than you eat.  So there is the answer, boys and girls, just exercise and diet, lol .  I told him I could lose 20 pounds pretty easy but then get comfortable and after awhile I gain 25 back.  I need to really get it all off.  Oh, well I didn't expect him to understand but it did make me feel like a failure :(

When  I went for my first "6 month supervised physician diet visit" prior to surgery, my PCP
told me that I didn't need surgery......  are you ready......

ALL I HAD TO DO WAS TO EAT 500 CALORIES LESS A DAY.  So I have never seen the man since. hahahaha
 
I called the Bariatric office and asked who they might suggest that was in our health system.  The lady I went to was very understanding and stated she knew I I could lose the weight, just couldn't keep it off. (  She saw my WW records and actually listened to my history. ) She was very kind.

You are not a failure.  You are dealing with a chronic disease called Obesity and you are not the only one with it.  Please hold your head up high and believe that getting healthier will be worth the hard work.

Kristi

 Did you read my thread about Diets?  If diets worked long-term, none of us would be here.  

Tami

Forgive him for he is clueless!
Since you're just starting the process you'll come away from your consult armed with more information.  Once you make your final decision you'll be able to ask for support for a decision you've already made based on the facts as you understand them.

I guess we can't expect people who have never walked in our shoes to understand, and in a very basic sense, they are right about diet and exercise.  They are two things we all have to master even with the band.  But the piec e that most people don't understand is that Obesity is a chronic disease and that's a tough sell on someone who's never been in our shoes. 

I'm proud of you for doing what's right for you and being honest.  It won't be long before that boss of yours is in awe of all the weight you've lost!

Hang in there!

Best~
Lisa O.

D**n! Why did no-one ever tell me that before? Wouldn't have bothered to have surgery!

Kate

I can't explain why so many people seem to know just what we need to do to lose weight, but I do know I have had to learn to ignore them.  I love them in spite of their lack of helpfulness.  Sometimes we just have to find our own personal way and stick to it.

Good luck ... everyone will be so impressed with your weight loss whatever way you get there.

Carolyn

Thanks everyone for your encouraging words.  It's funny how you can go from feeling so proud of your decision to feeling like a failure.  I expect many people won't understand but it is not their's to understand, its mine.  I am classified as obese with 60 pounds needed to lose.  Hopefully this will work an I can get off some of my meds.

No-one truly understands who has not been where we have all been. My family are 100% supportive but they can only listen to what I tell them and try to understand - they can't feel it as everyone on this board can.

That's why, for all its imperfections, this is such a great place to come!

Kate

You are NOT a failure and I am so sorry that you experienced this with your boss - This is why I told NO ONE (except a very small exclusive group)  I told my boss that I was going on vacation - it's none of her business.  I decided if I had any follow up complications with my surgery, I would tell people that I had hernia repair (it's true - my Doc did that too when he put the band in)

I know with me, I tend to internalize the comments of others and allow them to sabotage me. If someone had said that to me, I would have been devastated and it would have been hard getting over it. 

Ya know the thing that gets me, would you cavalierly say to an alcoholic or a smoker, well just stop drinking or smoking?  There's more to it for some of us than a formula.  

 

Problem is, it is a very small office and we all know each others business.  He is really great to work for and would do anything for me but sometimes I wish I worked for a big company and could just take off without anyone knowing my business.  Last year I had a hysterectomy and scheduled it around when I do sales tax payments, lol.  Then only took off 3 weeks and went back 1/2 days.  I am hoping to have the surgery on a Friday morning and try to go back on Tuesday.  It is a desk job so I should be ok.  Problem with someone not supporting your decision is that they will be tracking my success, looking for failure.  He also doesn't understand how people can live paycheck to paycheck.  That is why you shouldn't try and walk in anyones shoes buy your own.  Speaking of shoes, wonder if I will get back in a 7 1/2 instead of my size 8?  thanks yall have helped me make it through this day without crying