WLS wars (mine is better than yours???)....thoughts.....

I'm glad you were in the right "state of mind" for change. I believe you will win this battle!!! Best wishes to you!!!

Hey, Jen, how'd you get so smart? : )

I used to get upset over the surgery wars too.  Finally I realized it was like whispering into a hurricane, and I really do have better things to occupy my time and energy now.

I think you may have extra protective of your choice because we "lightweights" are often criticized by WLS folks of every persuasion.  I can remember a bandster posting something (2-3 years ago) along the lines of:  "You only have XX pounds to lose? How dare you have WLS?" - as if we're using up valuable resources that someone heavier deserves more - as if we haven't worked hard to earn the health insurance that paid for our surgery - as if our own cash payment for our surgery is somehow stealing money of out someone else's pocket - as if we the health problems we suffer at XXX pounds are insignificant.  Well, I say, "Pooh on them."

Jean

Hi Jean!

Your post are always so great! You hit it right on...with the lightweight issue. It's sooo true! I still have my fingers crossed that with the great amount of people doing wls and the huge amount of awareness...people will be a little more kind or understanding. I guess it takes some people to "pave" the way for others. I guess I'll take that role and pay it forward. Thanks for always posting such great insight into this crazy and wonderful journey!!!

It's never too late to re-kindle that relationship! I just found my best friend from 10 years ago - something stupid happened and we just sort of drifted apart. So give it a try! I'll pray for you too!

We are trying to patch things up, but sometimes "life" takes you on a whole new path and it's hard to "sync" the two sometimes. I haven't given up hope though. Thanks for your kindness!
Best wishes to you.

I know..."What are you doing here?"....

Well, my second mom (proper term is stepmom) is looking into having the Lapband or either Realize band, so I look for answers to questions here.  But I share your same belief system...I do not engage in surgery wars.  It's just a tool, and you can outeat each one.  For each surgery out there I know at least one person for whom it has not worked.  And several for whom it has.

With that being said, if you notice, the same surgery war folks are the same ones who are negative Nancy's about almost everything.  Which makes the BLOCK function so useful!  Irregardless of what they did inside to those type of folks, they didn't do surgery on the intelligence portion of their brain...so for now, I just block! 

I agree with you.  There are some people who seem to actually enjoy being negative, not just on OH but everywhere.

When I was l little, when people said something like, "How's your mother these days?", the correct answer was "She's 80 years old, but she still enjoys good health."

Even as a kid I understood that my grandmother was being ironic when she said of an acquaintance, "She enjoys poor health."

Jean

I've noticed that even in the band forums, there is a "my band is better than your band" attitude at times. It is a very personal choice based on personal experience, research and our doctor's recommendation per our own needs.
I chose banding over gastric bypass surgery due to observing 4 individuals (2 had lap-band and 2 had RNY)...both banders are doing great, one 5 years out and one 14 months out. They have lost the majority of their excess weight, are living healthier and happier lives and do well in social situations. Neither is struggling in any way with their bands.
My two friends who had RNY have had opposite experiences, which are more a reflection of their lifestyle choices, than their choice of WLS. One friend had her surgery in 2001 and lost all of her excess weight and has kept most of it off, going up and down about 20 lb. She looks great, feels great and is having experiences she could not have had at 330 lb.
The other friend is almost 2 years out from her surgery and is an absolute mess...she is in danger of losing her life. She had emotional problems and is an alcoholic and prescription drug addict and has not done well. As she approached her goal weight, her problems with drugs and alcohol became worse...she recently completed rehab for the first time and is sober (120 days) but at 5'9" 110 lbs is dangerously thin. She did not quit smoking before surgery, went to 5 psych appointments before she found one who would clear her for surgery, she will not adhere to a food program and drinks heavily. Because she was non-compliant pre-op, but a very good concealer, she is in this situation...a bi-polar, anorexic, alcoholic prescription drug addict with ulcers. It is so sad.
My choice was made based not just on this, but I have had multiple surgeries for other things and just wanted to have the least invasive surgery possible to help me manage portions.
Another thing that swayed me was the "Failed WLS" forum...it is almost 100% bypass and the stories are horrific.