I'm so upset

EXACTLY!  When I came to OH.com, if someone didn't support someone, they did not post to that person.  What happened to the pharase, "if you can't say anything nice then don't say anything at all"

Hey - I have to say that's out of line!  We all need support at different times and for different reasons.  I have been with Alyssa throughout her entire journey, and this has been no picnic for her.  Alyssa's life has totally changed from someone losing rapidly and exercising like a maniac, to someone who can't walk around the block without severe pain.  I think you misunderstood her post, or at least I hope that's what happened (because I don't see you as a mean-spirited person at all).

I don't think she meant it that way at all.  Just that things need to be put in perspective. I believe we have been supportiive in many many posts, threads, forums, PMs, emails, regarding many topics, issues, and problems.  I guess I'm just not sure what more any of us can do at this point. If Alyssa wants surgery sooner she'll have the surgeon do it.  If she is in that much pain and discomfort it is better to get it done and not worry if her 1st surgeon can watch or not. I'm not being unsupportive, just realistic.

I understand your point - I just wish that the negative crap could be done during PM's and emails and phone calls.  Directly.  Heh, what an idealist I am! And you make a good point - we have to take care of ourselves and that often involved tough decisions in this busy world we inhabit.

I guess I feel that if someone is this miserable and unhappy due to many many medical conditions there is no value in waiting so another doctor gets to watch the procedure.  If he wants to watch that bad, he'll change is schedule.  I'd be inclined to let someone watch too if that is what they wanted but not if I had to put off something that was making me that miserable. I don't think Banana was out of line in what she wrote and I don't think it was negative.  I think someone said what needed to be said, finally.  But then I've been accused of not being supportive before for not being a head patter.  I'm one to shake someone up and scream WAKE UP when necessary.  Cooing and patting heads isn't my idea of support, honesty is.  I needed it during my weight loss journey and I think most of us do at one time or another. We *have* been supportive and understanding through many many threads and many many posts and many different forums for a variety of issues, complications, and problems.  Suggesting that someone put off surgery that will improve the quality of life so a doctor gets to watch the procedure is insanity in my mind. Folks can flame away, I agree with Banana,

I did not have a CHOICE to put off the surgery.  It wasn't within  my control.  He is my surgeon, he arranged it with this expert, and he has to be there.  End of story.  This is a priority for me, I couldn't keep the surgery date, and I'm upset about that.  What you and banana are saying is that I chose to pu**** back for my surgeon.  No, he cancelled it.  So please stop saying that I had some control in the matter.  I don't want to switch surgeons, so I have to go with what he wants to do.  End of story.

My mistake.  I was going by what you wrote previously: >>You know... my surgeon doesn't HAVE to be there, but since I am his patient, he has never done this repair post-banding, he wanted to see it done before doing one one his own (he doesn't have to do that but he is one of those doctors that goes above and beyond).<< And:
>>My surgeon wants to be there (he says that I'm "his girl" and since he is my surgeon, friend, and mentor, I want him there).<< I just thought if you were in so much pain and your health was at issue, sooner is better than later.

When I wrote that before, I meant that he is my surgeon, I didn't want to change surgeons.  I could leave my surgeon's practice and go to the expert exclusively, but my surgeon's follow-up care and fills are important to me (best follow-up care in the area).  I just can't leave his practice.  So, yeah, if I left his practice, he wouldn't have to be there... but I can't leave his practice.  Yeah sooner is better than later and I am in pain, but since it is not life threatening, they feel they can put it off a bit longer.  Sucks for me, I know.

Alyssa, Don't waste your time trying to explain yourself.  You have been through the ringer and hopefully "the expert" will fix your problem.  Please don't feel you have to substantiate your reasoning for the few type "A" personalities here on the board!! Good Luck and I am hoping the best for you

Thanks Jim!  I guess I feel like I have to explain myself when there are a few people that just don't understand what is going on.  I guess I will never be able to describe what I am dealing with or what cir****tances are involved with planning this surgery.  As much as I like this "expert", I adore my surgeon.  And frankly, the expert is so busy and out of town more than my surgeon.  It was just unfortunate that this one Friday... of all the Friday's that were open for him, he had to be out of town.  The expert will be out of town the next 2 Fridays and I can't reschedule my exam for the 4th.  There I go again... trying to explain how complicated this is!  Oh well... I'm grateful for my supportative friends!  I just wanted to tell you guys to hold off on your prayer's, well wishes, etc for a later date!  I will post my new date as soon as I find out (hopefully tomorrow... go to see the expert for the pre-op appointment).