Don't Tell Me You Can Relate, You Skinny B****
I'm pre-op and this liquid diet is about to make me go postal (not really, but you know, what I mean). I'm really starting to hate all skinny people (not REALLY really, but you know what I mean) who tell me they understand what I'm going through.
Most annoying quotes by skinny *****es (not really *****es, but you know what I mean):
This was the latest quote that really annoyed me: "Oh, I know what you mean. It's awful. I once had to take a blood test and they told me I couldn't have anything to eat after midnight. And my appointment wasn't until 11:30! I thought I was going to die." You fasted for eleven and a half hours and THAT made you feel like you were going to die? Are you effing kidding me?
"I know what it's like to have to give up food. I once had to give up junk food for a whole month so I could fit back into my 'skinny jeans.'" Wow, a record for you.
"You should try Weigh****chers. It really works." Yeah, so I can watch the weight getting bigger and bigger while my pocket book gets smaller and smaller.
"Whatever you do, only go to the grocery store when you're not hungry." So.. I guess that would be.. NEVER?
"Just don't think about it. Do something to distract your attention from food." Ah! That must be the answer! Of course! How silly of me.
"The hunger only last for a while. Eventually, your stomach will shrink and you won't be hungry anymore." Yeah right. Sixteen months later, I was still waiting for "my stomach to shrink" and for the hunger to go away. Never happened (although, I did lose a lot of weight).
Few people understand that food addiction is worse than other addictions in many ways. Most importantly, we have to eat food. In heroin terms, restricting food would be like giving a heroin addict 1/4 fix of heroin once a day - just enough to keep them from dying, just enough to make them want more, and not enough to stop the withdrawal. Going to the store would be a nightmare to the heroin addict - you got your chicken nugget heroin, your bacon heroin, your freshly baked heroin cookies, sirloin heroin steaks, heroin pasta, heroin cereal, heroin chips and crackers, heroin this, heroin that. The heroin addict would hate their Facebook friends who keep posting holiday heroin recipes with close-up pictures of the heroin. And let's not even talk about all the holiday heroin commercials on TV. And of course, then there are your family members who have to keep their heroin in the fridge and pantry and even have to cook it so the whole house smells like heroin. There's just no escaping the heroin! Oh, but wait, we're talking about food, not heroin.
People who simplify food issues drive me crazy.
Ok, well... I feel better now. Thanks for listening!
Most annoying quotes by skinny *****es (not really *****es, but you know what I mean):
This was the latest quote that really annoyed me: "Oh, I know what you mean. It's awful. I once had to take a blood test and they told me I couldn't have anything to eat after midnight. And my appointment wasn't until 11:30! I thought I was going to die." You fasted for eleven and a half hours and THAT made you feel like you were going to die? Are you effing kidding me?
"I know what it's like to have to give up food. I once had to give up junk food for a whole month so I could fit back into my 'skinny jeans.'" Wow, a record for you.
"You should try Weigh****chers. It really works." Yeah, so I can watch the weight getting bigger and bigger while my pocket book gets smaller and smaller.
"Whatever you do, only go to the grocery store when you're not hungry." So.. I guess that would be.. NEVER?
"Just don't think about it. Do something to distract your attention from food." Ah! That must be the answer! Of course! How silly of me.
"The hunger only last for a while. Eventually, your stomach will shrink and you won't be hungry anymore." Yeah right. Sixteen months later, I was still waiting for "my stomach to shrink" and for the hunger to go away. Never happened (although, I did lose a lot of weight).
Few people understand that food addiction is worse than other addictions in many ways. Most importantly, we have to eat food. In heroin terms, restricting food would be like giving a heroin addict 1/4 fix of heroin once a day - just enough to keep them from dying, just enough to make them want more, and not enough to stop the withdrawal. Going to the store would be a nightmare to the heroin addict - you got your chicken nugget heroin, your bacon heroin, your freshly baked heroin cookies, sirloin heroin steaks, heroin pasta, heroin cereal, heroin chips and crackers, heroin this, heroin that. The heroin addict would hate their Facebook friends who keep posting holiday heroin recipes with close-up pictures of the heroin. And let's not even talk about all the holiday heroin commercials on TV. And of course, then there are your family members who have to keep their heroin in the fridge and pantry and even have to cook it so the whole house smells like heroin. There's just no escaping the heroin! Oh, but wait, we're talking about food, not heroin.
People who simplify food issues drive me crazy.
Ok, well... I feel better now. Thanks for listening!
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