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Topic: RE: The Female Brain Cell
Thats not only funny but oh so true! hope you dont mind i foward that to some friends in my address book!
Maureen
Topic: The Female Brain Cell
There was this female brain cell that got lost one day in a male brain. But she found out she was all alone. And she couldn't get out.
She started to wander around in a panic yelling "Hello, Hello, is anybody here?". This went on for quite a while and she was very scared and alone.
All of a sudden she get this corporate yell back "We're all Down Here!" 
Topic: RE: Two Texans in Oklahoma
ROFL..... I LOVED IT.... THIS IS MY FIRST TIME IN THIS SITE HUMOR SITE... I NEVER KNEW HOW TO GET IN HERE TIL TOOTER TOLD ME LOL... I LIVE IN OKLAHOMA TOO LOL... GOOD ONE IM GOING TO BE SHARING WITH MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS LOL...
Topic: Two Texans in Oklahoma
Bubba Wayne and Billy Bob, who are both from Denton, Texas, traveled to Grand Lake, Oklahoma for a vacation.
While walking along a busy downtown street, they see a sign in a store window which reads, "Suits $5.00 each, Shirts $2.00 each and Trousers $2.50 a pair."
Bubba Wayne says, "Woo Hoo, Billy Bob! We could buy a whole gob of these clothes, take 'em back to Denton, sell 'em to all our friends and make a fortune fer us." Bubba Wayne continues, "Now when we go in there, don't you say a word, okay?
Just let me do the talkin' 'cause if they hear your Texas accent, they might think we're ignorant, and they won't wanna sell them clothes to us. Now, I'll talk in a slow, fake Oklahoma drawl so's they won't know." They go in and Bubba Wayne says with his best fake Oklahoma drawl, "I'll take 50 of them thar suits at $5.00 each, 100 of them thar shirts at $2.00 each, and 50 pairs of them thar trousers at $2.50 each. I'll just back up my pickup and......"
The owner of the shop interrupts, "Ya'll from Texas, ain'cha?" "Well....yeah," says a surprised Bubba Wayne. "How come'd you know that?" The owner replies, "Cause this is a dry-cleaners." 
Topic: Smarter Than You Think
There was a little boy named Johnny who used to hang out at the local corner market. The owner didn't know what Johnny's problem was, but the boys would constantly tease him. 
They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load or two pickles short of a barrel. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and Johnny would always take the nickel (they said) because it was bigger.
One day after Johnny grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
With a big grin on his face, Johnny slowly turned toward the store owner. "Well," he answered, "If I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I've saved $20!" 
They would always comment that he was two bricks shy of a load or two pickles short of a barrel. To prove it, sometimes they would offer Johnny his choice between a nickel (5 cents) and a dime (10 cents) and Johnny would always take the nickel (they said) because it was bigger.
One day after Johnny grabbed the nickel, the store owner took him aside and said "Johnny, those boys are making fun of you. They think you don't know the dime is worth more than the nickel. Are you grabbing the nickel because it's bigger, or what?"
With a big grin on his face, Johnny slowly turned toward the store owner. "Well," he answered, "If I took the dime, they'd stop doing it, and so far I've saved $20!" 
Topic: Bet You Didn't Know
Whuts gut six teef an a thousan legs?????????????????
an unemployment line in Alabama
Topic: RE: Children in church
When my son was learning to talk, we lived with my parents, sister, and cousins (such a crowded house). We had a total of 5 dogs, all of whom loved to bark at the mailman. They'd make so much noise that somebody would eventually yell "SHUT UP" to quiet them, and it always worked.
It got to be a habit that whenever there was a lot of noise of ANY kind, someone would yell out those two magical words. So one Sunday evening, we were in church. Now, up till that time, Charlie (my son) had never put two words together. Well, the pastor got to preaching hot and heavy, really calling down some fire, and he got extremely loud.
At that moment, Charlie decided to do what we always do for loud noises. He stood up on the seat and yelled out "SHUT UP!!!!!!!"
Fortunately for me, it wasn't all that understandable, but every mom in the church understood him and they all laughed. I was sooooooo embarrassed. Then the funny side struck me and I laughed till I cried. Thank God for a sense of humor!! 
Topic: RE: Inner Peace
WOHA !!! This really works. Thanks Fribby, Hick, oh excuse me, Hick.
Feeling fine, hick
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