My girlfriend's "fat" issue.

Alrighty..here's the thing. My girlfriend detests the word "fat". I have no problem saying it, or calling myself fat..because to me, its just a word!! I know she's had to have said it about other people, but every time I apply it to myself, she flips the hell out..and says, "You're not f***ing fat, I wish you wouldn't say that stupid s**t!" The thing is..I AM FAT, AND I ACCEPT IT! Its ridiculous for her to say that I'm not..I don't use words like "stocky" or "chunky" anymore, because to me..they're just nice words for a not-so-nice condition, and I'm blunt. How can I get her to stop freaking when I say something about my weight? Its not like I'm complaining too much or anything..I've only said it once or twice and she gets irate, so I stopped. I'd just like to see this from her point of view, but I don't see what the big friggin' deal is. -Brandy 2 months out - 50 lbs down!

Here are some words of advice. She is your g/f and you want to see her happy right? Well she probably feels that you referring to yourself as fat especially now that you have had the surgery is not a good idea. So maybe she is not wording it well..but listen to your girlfriend..stop referring to yourself as fat and know that now you are in a state of flux.. OH..you could refer to yourself as having......... SITUATIONAL CHUBB..LMAO..yeah cause see you will be loosing it anyway right?? The more posititve things you say outloud, the more positive you will feel on the inside... Also..if she seems to be getting angry about it..she may not know why it bothers her to hear you say you are fat..but usually it has to do with a weight issue the other person is having.. So keep that in check..if she is your size, bigger or even smaller..maybe she thinks that if you have lost 50lbs and still think you are fat..what do you think of her.. Wouldn't it just be fair to say that you don't want to upset your girlfriend?? This upsets her right..so just be more kind to yourself and choose your adjectives wisely.. I mean what harm would come of that??? Sincerly.. Diana L. also experiencing..THE SITUATIONAL CHUBB.. LOL..

I've stopped using the word for her benefit, already.. I just wanted to see if anyone could explain why she flipped about it. I've lost 50 pounds so far and I feel GREAT - I couldn't be happier with myself, and I feel like its just going to continue to get better. When I made the comments, it would be like, "Well I can't wear those pants.. my fat rolls don't agree with 'em." Just conversational! But anyways..I dunno, I do respect that she doesn't want me to use the word towards myself..so I've stopped doing it within earshot of her. And she is in basketball..she's only about 150 or so, so she is NOT fat. lol.. I don't see her reflecting my words onto herself. Thanks for the words of wisdom though.. I'll have to remember "situational chub", my mom would get a kick outta that!

Brandy, Maybe it's just hard for your girlfriend to hear you say something that puts you down. When you say something like that it probably is a derogatory remark against yourself. We have all been hurt by the word fat. If we use it on ourselves in a nasty manner, then we are in sense putting ourselves down. She probably loves you too much to see you do that to yourself and that's my guess about why she gets so angry at it. It's also possible that she has had to defend you against the "fat" word. People don't say, think or feel good about that word or about being fat. Put yourself in her shoes. You probably wouldn't want to hear her knocking herself around verbally would you? It's wonderful to accept that you are fat because it helps us deal with how to be not fat, but not to belittle (hum... be little?) yourself. Just give her a hug.. she is protecting you. Congrats on the weight loss and keep up the good work! Amy