I need help..advice

Hi all

I have posted over here in the past.. Some may know me from the R&R board...

 

Anyway I am concerned about my son. And any incite or advice would be welcome.. Is this normal behavior or not..


My son is almost 19 years old and gay. We are so OK with that.. But he is well "being a ****". I have stressed over and over that sex with love is better... But he is 19 and a dude...
I think he is putting himself in danger, he has meet men on-line.. He is to young and stupid to understand the risks..

I know in my heart he just wants to be loved , but he is going about it all wrong.

He is a submissive (bottom) so that is even more risky...

What do I do.. How do I get him to get it..

In my experience as a hetero at 19 the guys would ALWAYS go as far as I would let them.. So if there are two men involved is sex always the outcome..

Hi Brenda

i can only give you advice based on my own experiences.  your son is half my age and the whole attitude on the gay scene has changed dramatically since I came out at 19.  We were in the total backlash of the AIDS crisis and, while I did sleep around a lot, I was always careful and still am.  Many of my friends weren't or just didn't care and are either positive now or sadly no longer with us.

I see the youngsters on the scene today and it frightens me just how invincible they seem to appear.  they have no point of reference for the need for safe sex and so it doesn't really occur to them.  there are so many recreational drugs around now that inhibitions get lowered etc.....

My mother thankfully is as loving and understanding as you seem to be.  She opened a dialogue with me right from day one telling me how much she loved me and respected me to live an honest life and alternative lifestyle.

My suggestion would be to be totally honest with him, tell him your concerns and fears. We all want to be loved and many of us go about it the wrong way.  Most of us wise up though as we get a little older and get a little more respect for ourselves.

hope this helps somewhat. 

I agree with britboy. I believe the main thing is to be sure your son knows you love him. Loving him has nothing to do with wheather you understand him being gay or not. He needs to feel he can come talk to you about anything no matter what it is. Being a submissive can be dangerous, so caution him to always be careful. (you do understand being a sub is differnt from being a bottom?) Talk to him about having a safe call. Feel free to pvt message me if you want. Make sure he has ******s even if you have to by them for him.

David B.