OT ::update::

i'm terrified of coming out, honestly.  i dont know what to do. i'm so confused.

*update: well i came out to the girl i liked, and it was like the hardest thing ever, shes the only person i've told, but she has something going on with this other girl. its not like i was looking for a relationship or anything anyways. next it will be to tell my best friend. who will probably be okay with it, if she starts acting weird though i'll punch her.

&thank you everyone for all of the advice, seriously you are all helping SO much <3

Coming out?  Well, how old are you?  Do you have any support at all?  Does anyone know already?  If not, maybe start with someone who you know would support you no matter what.  Thay can be your rock.  Eventually the rest should fall into place.  But always remember in a nut shell Those who mind-don't matter- and those who matter-don't mind.   AND....you always have the love of us :)   Good luck sweetie.

i'm eighteen, and seriously terrified. i have no actual friends that i can tell without them freaking out about it. i think i'm more afraid of my mom freaking out though. thanks so much for all of this though. i hope i can get something figured out. 

I'm with Jill on this.  "Those who mind" mentality.  It's very very true.  With that said, I did a cannonball myself and everything still worked out fine.  I was married at the time and lived next door to my Dad.  I told my wife first out of respect, then my Dad.  Then I called an accquaintence that I knew would tell pretty  much everyone I knew and within about three days time it was done.  Some people backed off for a while and came back around after they had some processing time and others were fine from the get go.  My best friend never spoke to me again.  So, you just never know.  The point is, I'm completely out going on 10 years almost and life has never been better.  I would caution that it does'nt work that way for everyone but, it's more how you deal with it than how they deal with it.  You have be strong and solid even when you feel broken and maimed.
oh yeah, and I'm from a hyperreligious small southern town, so , ya know,  I'm feelin' a bit like "if I can survive that then bring it Life,   Bring it ON!!!"   LOL.  Hope this helps or at least makes you smile.  Keep us updated.

Just do it. There is no right or wrong way to say it ..and honestly you'll find out who your true friends are after! They'll either stick by you or take off. It hurts but when you think about it ...do you really want those kind of friends any way?

Dan Savage the amazing advice man has some great insight on this;

"Consider coming out first to an adult you trust (a school counselor, your gay uncle). Second, try to come out to one friend, preferably one who loves the show Glee. Having a peer ally is critical to your mental health. Finally, when you do come out to your parents, just be sure you're not in a moving vehicle." and make sure that they can't financially harm you.

I waited until I was 24, but it was the worst/greatest day of my life. I have never felt so free, so unburden and I will never go back in the closet again.

I wish you luck and mad love!!

LMAO @ GLEE

  Love this, love it , love it. 

My buddy runs an organization here in Ct called True Colors. They were formed 15 years ago specifially to support sexual minority youth. They have a web site at ourtruecolors.org. I couldn't agree more with the idea that you can do this in steps and get some allies to support you so that if/when you decide to come out to your mum you will have some love and  support if it goes badly. I came out and had girlfreinds when I was 21 but did not , finally, tell my father, until after I graduated nursing school when I was 27. I needed to be able to take care of myself financially. There are some wonderful poeple here on this site and some great folks/information/resources on the True Colors site as well. Good luck. Trust your instincts on this one about who and how to come out. We are right here Carissa!!

Carissa,
well it IS terrrifying......don't feel you're alone with that feeling!
But it has HUGE benefits and in the end you gain more respect for yourself as well as from others. There is nothing worse than living a lie!

You don't mention where you're from, that can make a huge difference in how this coming out process goes. In bigger towns or near bigger cities, there are support systems in place (suppport groups, gay groups for all ages, social centers)  The internet can provide a lot of info on what's availible to you locally and in surrounding areas.
Here in Boston, there is BAGLY (Boston area Gay and Lesbian Youth) a peer support group that holds dinners, nights out, dances, even high school proms....is there anything like this in your area where you can find like-minded friends? It's nice to have some support before you start coming out to everyone from your "old" life.....but remember  true "old friends" will remain good friends....let the haters drop away and be happy they're gone.

Remember the reward in the end......a happy, healthy, honest life!!!
hope this helps.......good luck in the journey
I will help in any way I can
Greg